"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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I'm not doing something right, but I don't know what

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yuppaz

Master Don Juan
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Hey,

I've been trying to get better with women for a while now and am not having very much success. I get initial attraction pretty well, but it never seems to move beyond that when I approach and go for a GOOD number close or insta date.

I have posted some field reports. I usually come in with some witty line, then just:
1. Chit chat about nothing special, then try to close
2. Try to tease her a little bit, but not too mean. Try to have some fun, but it may seem disingenuous to them
3. Maybe give a compliment, then try switching subjects up
4. Get slightly verbally sexual and with my body
5. Tried speaking passionately and telling stories

I'm really not doing very well. I had a recent set seem to have some fun, and seemed interested, but wouldn't give out the digits (might have been because she had a really bad schedule, like she told me about earlier), also another recent one that I REALLY wanted to get something going with (my version of a 10), not give out the number, but take mine (uhhh no, she didn't call.... lmao). I feel like I am doing something fundamentally wrong and I can't figure out what it is.

I have been adjusting my behavior around what I think will work, because I have never really been good with women and I just want this stuff to start clicking for me.


PPPlease assist in any way possible if you have been in this a while and have been honestly able to help friends etc. with their troubles. I don't feel I need generic answers but something substantial.

Thanks in advance!
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Apocalypse Now

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Are you at a good confidence level?

Do you see them as winning you? Or are you still in the "I must win over this girl" mindset?

How's your Alpha Male mentality?
 
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yuppaz

Master Don Juan
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I think that due to scarcity and not ever having seen that kind of thing in real life, I still see them as the prize (although I know that is wrong). My confidence level is ok, but fading due to the lack of actual dates as a result of approaches. I really don't know why, but I have been having such a hard time hooking.
 
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yuppaz

Master Don Juan
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Oh Alpha mentality... I'm not sure man... it gets so convoluted in set.
 
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Apocalypse Now

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You need to work on your core then. That is, work on finding the happiness within yourself. If you look toward others (friends, family, girls) to establish your happiness, you can never be an Alpha Male.

Once you can honestly say that you're happy with yourself FIRST, and you don't need other people around to make you happy, then you'll be good to go. Find new hobbies, be more active, go to the gym, love yourself, accept everything about you (good and bad), and then you'll have the aloof/indifferent attitude needed to get women.


I'm still working on this also. It's not an overnight thing.


Edit: Think of the movie Rocky (my favorite movie). He had the technique to be a great boxer, but if he didn't have the HEART, he would have never gone as far as he did. INSIDE is most important.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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yuppaz

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I think the matter with me is more tactical at this point. Inner game is probably not all there, but good enough to date I would hope.
 
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Unbridled_Phoenix

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Stop adjusting your behavior. The inner game, who you are, is everything. When it is in harmony, your outer behavior will manifest automatically.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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