"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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I'm new..and have a problem

Kamikaze10223

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Hey guys..great site.been following for a while..and read the dj bible

Here's my situation:
there's this girl that my friend used to like..he's over her now..and they were friends for a few months..He gave me her screenname for aim

I know she's interested..she's been dropping hints..but i never followed up because i knew my friend wanted her at the time..

But now, idk how to start a conversation with her because she'll probably ask how i know her..or how i get her sn
though she does know i'm friends with the guy who gave me her sn

so i was thinking of saying i got it from him...but that might make me seem desperate...

my other idea was to say hi and ask if she was the girl checking me out allt he time..and i know she was..caught her looking back at me a few times after we passed by each other..

any ideas?
thanks
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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BongDuy

Master Don Juan
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Personally, I would NOT aim her, because I think its a little weird that your friend gave you her aim, which was cool of him, but i dont think that'll help you much.

You're much better off seeing her in person, and just saying "hey, whats up?" and then starting from scratch, like getting her phone number, setting up dates, and getting to know her better.

EDIT: I just kind of re-read your post, and You don't know her well at all? Do you two know each other's names?
 

eaglez1177

Master Don Juan
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Yea man you cant make the first time talking to her over a computer screen lol. You should always strive to talk to a girl as much as possible in person, as opposed to talking to her on the internet. Do not send her an im, but instead just go to her in person, and start talking like you've never met before. Start from scratch like BongDuy suggested.

I dont think shes gonna ask how you know her, cuz most people dont ask they when they meet someone for the first time. You prolly know her name, but she doesnt know yours im guessing? Just pretend you dont know what her name is. "Hey whats up im blah blah...whats your name?"
 

Kamikaze10223

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those were my thoughts
the thing is...

i dont want to wait till school starts
hah
impatient i know..but i feel like i could be spending at least one day of this christmas break with her
 

colombiandude

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I'd have to disagree with eaglez on saying that she probably does know youre name. if youve caught her looking back at you a few times already then shes probably very interested, which means shes probably asked her friends who you are or something. You could not introduce your name if you want to. lol. for the hell of it. Be like "Hey I've always see you around...blah blah, whats youre name? blah blah blah. Cool ill see you around." but like dont say youre name. Its your choice.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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