Piss off then my teenage friend, enjoy your no-sex-getting lack of game.Sofomore said:Also, I don't take advice from scumbags like you....
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Piss off then my teenage friend, enjoy your no-sex-getting lack of game.Sofomore said:Also, I don't take advice from scumbags like you....
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Asking for her to come to you on a weekend getaway is too excessive this early. You're basically admitting all your interest and pushing for relationship mode too soon. That's why she said that. You're giving off vibes that you're a couple, 'cause that's what couples do. Were you supposed to sleep in a hotel together? Heh..JYW said:dealing with a similar situation now. met up with this girl for drinks two weeks ago, it went well. she asked me to travel with her but cancelled due to changed plans... now when i ask her to a 2-day weekend trip she turns me down, saying i'm not her bf...i just straight up ignored the *****
**** being in the bullpen, you should be starting
I think you hit the nail on the head here. And I gotta say, I think lot of people fail to realize, ESPECIALLY the average chump, that the friend zone is a two way street. If she wants to be your friend, cool. She might be an awesome friend, but she shouldn't get any sort of girlfriend treatment or benefits until she deserves it.MasterFuu said:Go hang out with the girl have lots of fun and see what happens. If she didn't like you she would not even hang out with you. Maybe she has girlfriends that are attractive? It's always good to put yourself out there and see what happens...you never know.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Amen!Jeffst1980 said:For future reference, NEVER suggest wine and a movie at your place for a first date. Instead, make the date for a venue walking distance from your place, and then invite her to stop by for just a minute, if things are going well. Also give the disclaimer that she can't stay long, since you have to get up early tomorrow.
It is important that a girl feels like things "just happened," so that she doesn't feel like a slvt.
Also, don't judge whether a girl is "relationship material" until you've dated her non-exclusively for a couple of months. Doing so tends to provoke unattractive needy behavior on your end, and besides, you don't really know her.