PuertoRican_Lover
Banned
Jon E
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Ignoring You: A Possible Interest Sign?
- Thread starter icepick
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
PuertoRican_Lover
Banned
Jon E,
If the girl is shy...she is probably intimidated by you
If the girl is a hottie then it was because you ignored her and she wants to be the victor of your pursuits.
k_sweat88
New Member
Strongest Indicator
Ignoring you is perhaps the most obvious sign of interest a girl can exhibit. There are a few keys when trying to analyze her behavior.
1) She will ALWAYS appear friendly and talkative with everyone but you. You will not get a negative vibe from her but you will look around and realize an important fact. There will be guys that look like roadkill that get alot of attention from her. Put yourself in her shoes. It is alot easier for you to talk with a fat/ugly chick than a girl you are interested in. The same rule applies to her. Especially if she just met the entire group of guys.
2) She will frequently come in close proximity to you FOR NO APPARENT REASON. For example, there are three people sitting at a bar with forty empty seats. She will sit right next to you. When she does this she will appear nervous as hell and probably try to act like she doesn't notice your even sitting there. If she does gather the confidence to initiate convo it will be totally impersonal.
3) Her friends will constantly comment about her to you. They will not tell you that she is into you. They will tell you how funny/crazy she is. The entire time you are asking yourself, if this b**** is so funny why can't she even speak to me. Man this S*** is so obvious it's funny. The best thing about it is that (as others have mentioned) in 99% of these cases the girl will be incredibly hot.
The one drawback about girls who give these signals is that many of them have BFs. If you don't make a move, and this is 100% guaranteed, the next time you see her she will be in a make-out session with him.
Remember, just use common sense and you're In like Flynn.
Ignoring you is perhaps the most obvious sign of interest a girl can exhibit. There are a few keys when trying to analyze her behavior.
1) She will ALWAYS appear friendly and talkative with everyone but you. You will not get a negative vibe from her but you will look around and realize an important fact. There will be guys that look like roadkill that get alot of attention from her. Put yourself in her shoes. It is alot easier for you to talk with a fat/ugly chick than a girl you are interested in. The same rule applies to her. Especially if she just met the entire group of guys.
2) She will frequently come in close proximity to you FOR NO APPARENT REASON. For example, there are three people sitting at a bar with forty empty seats. She will sit right next to you. When she does this she will appear nervous as hell and probably try to act like she doesn't notice your even sitting there. If she does gather the confidence to initiate convo it will be totally impersonal.
3) Her friends will constantly comment about her to you. They will not tell you that she is into you. They will tell you how funny/crazy she is. The entire time you are asking yourself, if this b**** is so funny why can't she even speak to me. Man this S*** is so obvious it's funny. The best thing about it is that (as others have mentioned) in 99% of these cases the girl will be incredibly hot.
The one drawback about girls who give these signals is that many of them have BFs. If you don't make a move, and this is 100% guaranteed, the next time you see her she will be in a make-out session with him.
Remember, just use common sense and you're In like Flynn.
PuertoRican_Lover
Banned
k-sweat, I like your insight!
Kineti[C]harm
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 16, 2003
- Messages
- 1,520
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- 2
Just about any girl can be easily intimidated just by eyecontact depending on the guy...
“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”
You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.
I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.
Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.
These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.
oohhh god....
Can you guys one time put all this Ego BullSh|t, and try to have some common sense? Is that so hard?
I guess the main reason, why she's ignoring you is - SHE ISN't INTERSTED. Yes, it CAN be that reason (and most probably reason)!
Even VERY shy people let's you know that "you are in". they just can't help it...
Can you guys one time put all this Ego BullSh|t, and try to have some common sense? Is that so hard?
I guess the main reason, why she's ignoring you is - SHE ISN't INTERSTED. Yes, it CAN be that reason (and most probably reason)!
Even VERY shy people let's you know that "you are in". they just can't help it...
I agree that sometimes a girl just isn't interested in you and that's why she's ignoring you. However, the point here is that that's not always the case, and it's totally likely that she may also be very interested in you too.
Haven't you been interested in a girl before, and even though you'd totally go for her, you are a bit shy to just go talk with her? It has happened to everyone at some point, and the hotter a person is, the more difficult sometimes it is to be around them. Many times they'd rather be with you, but I've heard many times before that some women will be too paranoid about screwing things up that they'd almost rather not take that step.
It's sort of like a don't ask, don't tell type of feeling. I also know some women who are afraid of getting hurt, and that sort of becomes an anchor that holds them back from ever getting involved with you in the first place.
Haven't you been interested in a girl before, and even though you'd totally go for her, you are a bit shy to just go talk with her? It has happened to everyone at some point, and the hotter a person is, the more difficult sometimes it is to be around them. Many times they'd rather be with you, but I've heard many times before that some women will be too paranoid about screwing things up that they'd almost rather not take that step.
It's sort of like a don't ask, don't tell type of feeling. I also know some women who are afraid of getting hurt, and that sort of becomes an anchor that holds them back from ever getting involved with you in the first place.
JustDoItAlways
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- May 28, 2002
- Messages
- 914
- Reaction score
- 7
Chicks have two different MOs in showing interest: They either:
1. Make it so obvious that everyone including your AFC self can pick up on the signals. or,
2. They act very shy, sometimes dorky, sometimes ignore you because they are afraid of showing that interest. This is usually obvious as well. While these chicks are too shy to do anything about it, they make their intentions known in other ways like always "accidently" showing up where you will be, throwing total dork fests since they are so nervous. You get the picture.
But then there are chicks that just totally ignore you because they don't like your ass. They are not in the least attracted to you and they don't want you getting the wrong impression.
You have to learn to use your gut instinct. It is rarely wrong.
If you find yourself asking "Does she like me?", she almost always doesn't. Your gut is telling you she isn't interested.
But if you find yourself saying "Man I'm sure she likes me, since she is so obvious about it (or but she doesn't give any signs)." Then you are usually right in that she wants your ass.
THE MOST IMPORTANT LESSON THOUGH IS TO BE A MAN AND MAKE A MOVE AND FIND OUT FOR SURE EITHER WAY. Rather than being a loser AFC-guessing-type guy.
1. Make it so obvious that everyone including your AFC self can pick up on the signals. or,
2. They act very shy, sometimes dorky, sometimes ignore you because they are afraid of showing that interest. This is usually obvious as well. While these chicks are too shy to do anything about it, they make their intentions known in other ways like always "accidently" showing up where you will be, throwing total dork fests since they are so nervous. You get the picture.
But then there are chicks that just totally ignore you because they don't like your ass. They are not in the least attracted to you and they don't want you getting the wrong impression.
You have to learn to use your gut instinct. It is rarely wrong.
If you find yourself asking "Does she like me?", she almost always doesn't. Your gut is telling you she isn't interested.
But if you find yourself saying "Man I'm sure she likes me, since she is so obvious about it (or but she doesn't give any signs)." Then you are usually right in that she wants your ass.
THE MOST IMPORTANT LESSON THOUGH IS TO BE A MAN AND MAKE A MOVE AND FIND OUT FOR SURE EITHER WAY. Rather than being a loser AFC-guessing-type guy.
Genghis Juan
Senior Don Juan
My 2 cents:
Someone mentioned Doc Love in this thread and how his "System" isn't always the way to go. I totally agree with that. A true Don Juan, once one accumulates the necessary experience, control and discipline, learns to improvise and adapt to the girl one is prospecting out. One cannot use a "cookie cutter" approach, but simulateneously, must adhere to the fundamentals of "reading" girls' signals and filtering out girls who will waste your time. In the aggregate, women behave in similar ways when placed in the "hot seat", i.e. asked for the phone number, BUT, individually, girls can express interest in varying ways depending on their personality and morals as they continue to interact with you. Some girl's IL's skyrocket, some only grow gradually.
I feel that Doc Love's system will mainly lead you down the road to me sluttier types of girls; which may not be a bad thing depending on what you're looking for. The very conservative girls will get filtered out. Think about it, interaction between two people is pretty complex (depending on what they are looking to do, etc.), following a simplistic rule system like the "system" won't cut it. You just have to practice the art of seduction and conversation.
Anyways, I would say that if a girl is ignoring you in the group, chill out, and talk friendly to all the girls. Build a rapport with everyone in the class, including the guys and the teacher. Eventually, people will become familiar with you and you can eventually get girls to open up and you will find out soon enough if they are available and or interested in getting to know you better.
Someone mentioned Doc Love in this thread and how his "System" isn't always the way to go. I totally agree with that. A true Don Juan, once one accumulates the necessary experience, control and discipline, learns to improvise and adapt to the girl one is prospecting out. One cannot use a "cookie cutter" approach, but simulateneously, must adhere to the fundamentals of "reading" girls' signals and filtering out girls who will waste your time. In the aggregate, women behave in similar ways when placed in the "hot seat", i.e. asked for the phone number, BUT, individually, girls can express interest in varying ways depending on their personality and morals as they continue to interact with you. Some girl's IL's skyrocket, some only grow gradually.
I feel that Doc Love's system will mainly lead you down the road to me sluttier types of girls; which may not be a bad thing depending on what you're looking for. The very conservative girls will get filtered out. Think about it, interaction between two people is pretty complex (depending on what they are looking to do, etc.), following a simplistic rule system like the "system" won't cut it. You just have to practice the art of seduction and conversation.
Anyways, I would say that if a girl is ignoring you in the group, chill out, and talk friendly to all the girls. Build a rapport with everyone in the class, including the guys and the teacher. Eventually, people will become familiar with you and you can eventually get girls to open up and you will find out soon enough if they are available and or interested in getting to know you better.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
FreeStyleZ
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Dec 26, 2003
- Messages
- 358
- Reaction score
- 3
Seems as though im in a similar situation right now. This girl across the hall from me is constantly knocking on our door to borrow the dumbest stuff. She constantly is saying hi to me and we have a class together where she sits next to me and ill catch her staring and give her a look as to say "Why the hell are you staring at me". She'll just smile and then stop staring. ive just recently started talking to her more and in correlation to that ive recently noticed she's in our appt alot more. She comes by to visit my room mate supposedly.. but i think its to just be around me. She talks to thsi guy like they are good friends but tries to act uninterested in me.. even though im sure i have alot more to offer physically and mentally than my room mate. She came by today to use his computer but when he left to go out somewhere she stayed in the appt........ does that make any sense? The person she came to visit left and now its just me and her inthe appt. I went out to the living room to talk to her and would go back and forth because it would seem like she's busy and doesnt want to talk, but EACH DAMN time i started walking away she would answer or respond.. even though when i was sitting there she seemed uninterested. She kept asking me the same questin over and over about cars or wutever even though i told her i dont know. I dont know for sure but it certainly seems like thats the exact situation i have right now. Good thing im not interested in this girl like that.. otherwise it would be driving me nuts.
See, if a girl is clearly making excuses to be around you, then it's likely that she's pretty into you. However, to me, this has to be pretty clear.
If this happens to you and you're actually into the girl, you need to make a move soon, or else she can get frustrated and just forget about you. Girls like to pursue, but they also like to eventually make a catch.
If this happens to you and you're actually into the girl, you need to make a move soon, or else she can get frustrated and just forget about you. Girls like to pursue, but they also like to eventually make a catch.
Sex0r
Don Juan
- Joined
- Feb 2, 2004
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Some smart guy said that lol cba to try remember his name lol
So u get my point?lol. When chicks ignore u they're in to u.. it's a proven fact almost lol... aren't i right PRL/SM?
Don Juanabbe
Master Don Juan
Hallelujah!! Too many times I found myself in that position when I was younger. This is sound, sound advice.
IL of shy girls are hard to tell
i've encountered girls like this before, they're actually the reserved type. the "if you dont break the ice for me, then i wont talk to you" kind of girl.
cuz of this i notice that the really cute/hot ones are more reserved, probably cause they intimidate other guys and they're not used to interacting with men.
well usually i end up breaking the ice for them and find out that no ***** shield exists and that they're not purposely trying to ignore me.
BUT THE PROBLEM I FIND WITH RESERVED GIRLS. is that i find it challenging to track what their IL is. cause i get mixed signals usually. shy girls show interest differently compared to outgoing/outspoken girls.
this girl whom i think has interest in me was careful with what she said to me. she talks to me only when we're alone. and if another guy butts in and listens in on our convo...that's it, the convo just ended...cause it felt wrong talking to each other w/him listening. when we're with a group of friends, she wont really talk to me. man you can kino these girls all you want and they wont get mad. these are possible IL signs, but once again it's hard to tell.
all i have to say is that these girls are the best, cause they're a challenge cause you cant tell what their IL is, plus they're not desperate. usually these type of girls wait for the DJ's to take initiative. PLUS most of the time they're single!
i've encountered girls like this before, they're actually the reserved type. the "if you dont break the ice for me, then i wont talk to you" kind of girl.
cuz of this i notice that the really cute/hot ones are more reserved, probably cause they intimidate other guys and they're not used to interacting with men.
well usually i end up breaking the ice for them and find out that no ***** shield exists and that they're not purposely trying to ignore me.
BUT THE PROBLEM I FIND WITH RESERVED GIRLS. is that i find it challenging to track what their IL is. cause i get mixed signals usually. shy girls show interest differently compared to outgoing/outspoken girls.
this girl whom i think has interest in me was careful with what she said to me. she talks to me only when we're alone. and if another guy butts in and listens in on our convo...that's it, the convo just ended...cause it felt wrong talking to each other w/him listening. when we're with a group of friends, she wont really talk to me. man you can kino these girls all you want and they wont get mad. these are possible IL signs, but once again it's hard to tell.
all i have to say is that these girls are the best, cause they're a challenge cause you cant tell what their IL is, plus they're not desperate. usually these type of girls wait for the DJ's to take initiative. PLUS most of the time they're single!
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Genghis Juan
Senior Don Juan
I totally agree ScrewIt,
If you are looking for a girl who is LTR material, these reserved types are usually the best. They are usually the types that are either seriously involved in an LTR or are completely single and don't play the field. I think the cliche ... jeez suddenly I'm drawing a blank...something like "What is worth having is worth the hard work" or some BS like that. Girls like these are more loyal, etc. But of course, you have to get to know her as well....you may find out that she has a crappy personality.
If you are looking for a girl who is LTR material, these reserved types are usually the best. They are usually the types that are either seriously involved in an LTR or are completely single and don't play the field. I think the cliche ... jeez suddenly I'm drawing a blank...something like "What is worth having is worth the hard work" or some BS like that. Girls like these are more loyal, etc. But of course, you have to get to know her as well....you may find out that she has a crappy personality
.thats right
yes i agree they are loyal to a certain extent, but i'd say they're easily seduceable by any DJ, cause no ***** shield exists amongst them. another thing i noticed is that these girls might have low self-esteem, cause since they're intimidating...they dont get much attention from ppl. but underneath their indimidating cuteness, they're actually very nice ppl and very friendly. but yea i do agree that these girls are difinitely LTR material and the best.Originally posted by Genghis Juan
I totally agree ScrewIt,
If you are looking for a girl who is LTR material, these reserved types are usually the best. They are usually the types that are either seriously involved in an LTR or are completely single and don't play the field. I think the cliche ... jeez suddenly I'm drawing a blank...something like "What is worth having is worth the hard work" or some BS like that. Girls like these are more loyal, etc. But of course, you have to get to know her as well....you may find out that she has a crappy personality
LuckyStrike
Don Juan
Observation
I have been perplexed by this type of behavior also. Actually, my new female boss seems to go out of her way to ignore me and avoid eye-contact. There is no hostility, just a blatant act of ignoring me when we are in the same room together. But when the occasion does come up when we have to speak to one another, there is a noticable drop in her shield and I can sense a little tension there, even nervousness to a certain degree. I've tried some neghits and being my usually ****y/funny self to test the waters with favorable results occasionally...sometimes neutral. I find it curious though that she has got to know some of my other coworkers(male) but appears to be not interested in getting to know me(not that I'm real concerned). I have no intention of having a relationship with her since I don't generally date coworkers and she is also married. Who knows, I could be totally off base and she can't stand me, but my instincts seem to tell me otherwise.
I have been perplexed by this type of behavior also. Actually, my new female boss seems to go out of her way to ignore me and avoid eye-contact. There is no hostility, just a blatant act of ignoring me when we are in the same room together. But when the occasion does come up when we have to speak to one another, there is a noticable drop in her shield and I can sense a little tension there, even nervousness to a certain degree. I've tried some neghits and being my usually ****y/funny self to test the waters with favorable results occasionally...sometimes neutral. I find it curious though that she has got to know some of my other coworkers(male) but appears to be not interested in getting to know me(not that I'm real concerned). I have no intention of having a relationship with her since I don't generally date coworkers and she is also married. Who knows, I could be totally off base and she can't stand me, but my instincts seem to tell me otherwise.
hmm...
im puzzled
what does this mean if my girl ignoring me most of the time in school??
by ignoring, i mean *once or twice* come and sit with me during classes.. and prefer to spend time with her female frens... and sometimes(seldom) with her male frens..
though she did admitted to me wont looking for another one (guy) when in a relationship...
im puzzled
what does this mean if my girl ignoring me most of the time in school??
by ignoring, i mean *once or twice* come and sit with me during classes.. and prefer to spend time with her female frens... and sometimes(seldom) with her male frens..
though she did admitted to me wont looking for another one (guy) when in a relationship...
Reply
Oddly enough, looking back on my AFC days, these same things that people are describing, like hostility and complete ignorance, and odd behavior were something I did. Therefore, I totally believe that women can do this to you. The idea that if someone is interested in you they will show it is not always correct. Hell, I did it myself to a girl I was obsessed with- who knows what she thought-
I believe it is correct that those who exhibit these types of traits are more reserved, "fragile" types- not your easy lay girls
Interestingly, 4 yrs later, here I am making a move on the same girl and she seems to be doing what I did to her long ago when she was giving me buying signals. Funny kind of role reversal but I like my position -Ill be callin her up tonight
and I have to give mad props to this site-
Take the challenge-
You live and you learn
Oddly enough, looking back on my AFC days, these same things that people are describing, like hostility and complete ignorance, and odd behavior were something I did. Therefore, I totally believe that women can do this to you. The idea that if someone is interested in you they will show it is not always correct. Hell, I did it myself to a girl I was obsessed with- who knows what she thought-
I believe it is correct that those who exhibit these types of traits are more reserved, "fragile" types- not your easy lay girls
Interestingly, 4 yrs later, here I am making a move on the same girl and she seems to be doing what I did to her long ago when she was giving me buying signals. Funny kind of role reversal but I like my position -Ill be callin her up tonight
and I have to give mad props to this site-
Take the challenge-
You live and you learn
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.