If you have 250+ approaches under your belt

[poohead]

i've read something by style that says 250 is something like that 'magic number', that when you hit this number, all of a sudden you have conquered your fear and have achieved some level of mastery. those of you who have this many approaches under your belt - can you verify that this is indeed true? did something just 'click' at the 250 approach mark, and you all of a sudden 'could see the matrix'? how have you changed as a person since approach 1 and approach 250?

 

[crumpiteer]

i've read something by style that says 250 is something like that 'magic number', that when you hit this number, all of a sudden you have conquered your fear and have achieved some level of mastery. those of you who have this many approaches under your belt - can you verify that this is indeed true? did something just 'click' at the 250 approach mark, and you all of a sudden 'could see the matrix'? how have you changed as a person since approach 1 and approach 250?

i think that number is crap. conquer of fear & mastery doesn't come from approaches & gamings alone, but also from how you cope & deal with other experiences in your daily life

 

[Stackthestyles]

"There is no magic number"

I was happier, and could feel the matrix around me when I first decided to conquer my fears.

I have over a thousand approaches under my belt, I am now starting to think the matrix is retarded. I am beginning to believe all of the things that I hated when I was afraid. I realize now that I am hated. Apparently for me, I was the master of my old matrix, and now that I am in a new one I can see it, but it is nothing special, I don't want to be part of my current matrix.

 

[poohead]

"There is no magic number"

I was happier, and could feel the matrix around me when I first decided to conquer my fears.

I have over a thousand approaches under my belt, I am now starting to think the matrix is retarded. I am beginning to believe all of the things that I hated when I was afraid. I realize now that I am hated. Apparently for me, I was the master of my old matrix, and now that I am in a new one I can see it, but it is nothing special, I don't want to be part of my current matrix.

so it is pointless to continue to approach? can you elaborate on this?

 

[Doggystyle]

It all depends on how they go, 250 approaches is silly though. If you did 250 aproaches and got punched in the face (maybe too extreme) every time your not going to be a master!
Read the bootcampy loggy things, whatever you call them, about people doing approachs. all depends on the person how quickly there learning curve is.
(I'd find it difficult to find 250 people i'd WANT to approach where I live!)

 

[Doggystyle]

"There is no magic number"

I was happier, and could feel the matrix around me when I first decided to conquer my fears.

I have over a thousand approaches under my belt, I am now starting to think the matrix is retarded. I am beginning to believe all of the things that I hated when I was afraid. I realize now that I am hated. Apparently for me, I was the master of my old matrix, and now that I am in a new one I can see it, but it is nothing special, I don't want to be part of my current matrix.

uh huh! I hope your quoting something because you sound insane!!!

 

[Stackthestyles]

crumpiteer hit the situation on the head.

When I first started into the matrix you are talking about I was purely approach. I was a warrior, and I was constantly in battle. never did I stop to sit back and review the battle tactics, or plan any attacks, I was told what to do, and I followed orders without fail. I plowed through, there was no stopping me, women tried to reject me, but I was already sarging a new girl before she could make any difference.

There was no "magic number" the feeling was immediate. Over the course of one day I went from hating my life, fearing speaking to people, being silent, and avoiding any type of lifestyle, to a new me. I was energetic, I was talking to everybody, relating, and challenging. I made some stupid challenges, and luckily did not lose, they just didn't accept...

Since than though, I have continued approaching, but the energy is no longer there.

To lose your fear of approaching, you have to toally ignore it. I have no fear of approaching, there is no emotion involved when I approach any more... I am not happy, I am not sad, scared, angry, excited... I posted a list of 260+ feelings, and the only feelings I have now are related to apathy.

That is a bad thing... I am lost when it gets to this point... it is the reason I still post on this board.

What's your take on that? Think you'll ever hit that point? Are you now scared that one day approaching will be pointless?

 

[Stackthestyles]

If you did 250 aproaches and got punched in the face (maybe too extreme) every time your not going to be a master!

(I'd find it difficult to find 250 people i'd WANT to approach where I live!)

True it is the learning curve that poohead is asking about.

I love that, I wish I got slapped every time I approached. Perhaps that is what I need to do to get my energy flowing again. I need a challenge, I NEED something to fear, I need to feel a relief after a sarge, the fear of getting punched sounds cool.

PS, I am crazy... I am obeying human nature in doing so. You'll understand someday, I can't put it into words.

 

[poohead]

I"m just trying to psyche myself into continuing. Right now I don't seem to be improving as quickly as i'd like. I have to know that one day I'll get the skill and that there's a point to all this.

 

[Stackthestyles]

Heh, I approached this thread wrong I guess. You should have worded your request as wanting motivation, instead of looking for a "quick fix". I saw it on the same line as "If I had a million dollars" I would be happy.

Your a perfectionist I take it?

 

[Doggystyle]

I"m just trying to psyche myself into continuing. Right now I don't seem to be improving as quickly as i'd like. I have to know that one day I'll get the skill and that there's a point to all this.

Try not masturbating, or are you doing that already?

 

[Stackthestyles]

DoggyStyle, is it any different when a girl gives you a hand job?

 

[poohead]

Try not masturbating, or are you doing that already?

yeah. it's helping a lil, maybe i need to stop for good...

 

[poohead]

Heh, I approached this thread wrong I guess. You should have worded your request as wanting motivation, instead of looking for a "quick fix". I saw it on the same line as "If I had a million dollars" I would be happy.

Your a perfectionist I take it?

yeah i've been described as that

 

[gimmeyofonenumba]

I agree with style or whoever says this. The number itself has no significance other than being big. How i think it works though is it is like a placebo effect, but even better. You see, everyone thinks of an approach as such a big deal, and they start over-analizing it. If you put it in the 250 perspective you start seeing each approach as no big deal, nothing really special at all, just another day. Not only that you will start approaching just so you can reach that number. You'll be in line and say "oh i need 1 more approach before this week ends" that chick looks decent lemme go see what happens.

 

[Wiesman44]

who the hell counts their approaches ? i sure as hell don't, and haven't a clue how many i've done.

 

[john_1234]

i've read something by style that says 250 is something like that 'magic number', that when you hit this number, all of a sudden you have conquered your fear and have achieved some level of mastery. those of you who have this many approaches under your belt - can you verify that this is indeed true? did something just 'click' at the 250 approach mark, and you all of a sudden 'could see the matrix'? how have you changed as a person since approach 1 and approach 250?

The total number of cold approaches I have done is not even close to 250. That number is probably around 50. I am not counting approaches at parties/bars/clubs by the way. My 50 or so approaches were sporadic over a period of time. I still clearly remember my very first approach. I was so nervous my voice was cracking. After a number of appproaches though, I realized that there truly is nothing to fear and be nervous about. Nothing bad has ever happened when I cold approached; for the most part girls are actually nice and receptive the majority of times. What also helped is having a deeper understanding of why we are nervous and fearful of approaching women in the first place (Mystery explains it well and it makes a lot of sense). Nowadays when I cold approach, regardless of a good or bad outcome, I'll actually feel good about myself for even doing the approach in the first place. For me, it's so much better to take action and get no results than to not do anything at all. I still feel some fear and nervousness prior to an approach, but that fear and nervousness is nothing compared to when I first started. As I start chatting it up, the fear and nervousness goes away regardless of whether or not she's receptive or even being a *****. There is no magic number. Style advises 250 to hit that point. I needed less. We're all different. I think it will "click" for any guy when: 1) he has a deep understanding of why we feel fear/nervousness in the first place and 2) once he realizes that truly, nothing bad happens when cold approaching

 

[JezDuffield]

250 Approaches is alot, but you don't ever get the hot babe that you want on the first approach, I read somewhere on this site that if you can't get the hot babe on your second attempt then to give up on that lady and search for someone else, I don't agree with this for obvious reasons, if you are persistent and keep on asking you will either get your lady or you will be thrown in jail, if and when that happens it is the right time to give up, you never become an EXPERT at anything in this life until you eventually fail and by these failures you will learn to succeed, I did.

 

[poohead]

dude you're supposed to approach 250 different women not one woman 250 times

 

[Suckaazzclown]

i've read something by style that says 250 is something like that 'magic number', that when you hit this number, all of a sudden you have conquered your fear and have achieved some level of mastery. those of you who have this many approaches under your belt - can you verify that this is indeed true? did something just 'click' at the 250 approach mark, and you all of a sudden 'could see the matrix'? how have you changed as a person since approach 1 and approach 250?

I think all y'all lost count.

Nobody knows exactly how many approaches they did.

And if you DO know what your count is...it's probably because you don't have enough approaches..

250 is not the number..it's just a metaphor.

it's a metaphor because nobody counts to 250.

the point is to keep approaching until you lost count.