"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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If you found yourself in a commited relatioship would you leave sosuave?

Naughty Ninja

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If you found yourself in a commited relationship would you feel it time to leave so suave to focus on the relationship with what you've learned so far and only visit at times to remove yourself from some of the negativity seen here or continue to post on the regular?
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Masculinity

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Been in an LTR & didn't leave SS; it kept me sharp.
 

Naughty Ninja

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I'm not sure myself. I'd most likely forget about the site for a while as when I'm in a relationship i usually don't have any issues and know how to handle them even if I have to end the relationship period. Which is why in my history on here I really have nothing to complain about in or not in a relationship. Who knows. If i was bored and had downtime I'd probably post.
 

zekko

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I was in a commited relationship when I came here and I still am. I knew I was getting close to my 50s and I was having some trouble squaring that with my sexual identity. That's why I came here.

I can't say I've really learned anything here. Most of the worthwhile stuff here are things I either figured out myself from dating women, or is common sense, or part of the conventional wisdom when I was growing up, or I've just heard somewhere else.

That's why I get so surprised when people say this place changed their lives or think there is unique information here you can't get anywhere else. "Unplugging from the matrix" and all that. I guess it's different coming here when you're in your teens or early 20s. And probably different growing up these days than when I did.

But it is nice to have a place where all this information is gathered together. And there are some cool people here. But the main thing is, I've always been fascinated with the subject of attraction, plus I just like message boards, so that's why I stick around. This is the one I seem to be addicted to lately.

I do think this place is good at helping motivate you.
 
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The Gambler

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I'm pretty much with zekko here.... I am happily married, but I'm fascinated by the contributors here that really know what they're talking about. The principles taught here can be used in life in general, whether it be talking to another male, a boss, a stranger of either sex, etc. Plus, at the age of 41, I feel like I may finally have enough sense and experience to give decent advice to others.

The Gambler
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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perseverance

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I probably wouldn't leave, but I wouldn't be on here as frequently as I am at the moment. I enjoy this site because I'm always learning from it, always getting a different perspective and I like trying to help people out based on my experiences and knowledge, which isn't much, but If I can help someone out, then that's great.

This site has taught me alot about the uncompromising and callous behaviour that a lot of women indulge in and it has opened my eyes up to that and it means that I am in a much better place to determine whether or not a woman is worthy of my time and effort based on her behaviour etc. It's great at filtering out the trashy women which is the type of women I want to avoid, I'll leave them to BigNeil instead.
 

SgtSplacker

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I love the psychological aspects of the site and men's dealings with women. I'd still come back here if I were to find my "keeper"...
 

ArcBound

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Naughty Ninja said:
If you found yourself in a commited relationship would you feel it time to leave so suave to focus on the relationship with what you've learned so far and only visit at times to remove yourself from some of the negativity seen here or continue to post on the regular?
I take week or month long breaks from sosuave at times. While overall a good site if you keep visiting a website that basically tells you that you are doing something wrong, something not alpha, something not approved, and continually shows people with problems it eats away at your mind.

And as to the question I came to sosuave with the goal of being able to attract someone suitable for LTR. What I learned was other stuff lol
 

bigneil

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perseverance said:
It's great at filtering out the trashy women which is the type of women I want to avoid, I'll leave them to BigNeil instead.
As if perseverance had trashy women to avoid.
 

Itsjustme

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This site brings out alot of your insecurites, being in a relationship is different than being a player spinning plates etc.. The answer to everything is next the *****. She's a hoe etc.. I feel like when I disappear from here my relationship was the best but when I come back because of some small insecurity in the back of my mind it's just automatic you get attacked like WTF are you doing with this ***** etc.. And it just brings up a whole nother set of insecurities to deal with, is this guy right? Or am I just being paranoid? It only adds to the problems in a relationship, if it's truly a healthy trusting relationship you should be talking to your partner about your problems not a bunch of guys on a message board.

The information here is crazy good though for just getting laid, setting the frame etc It will get you into a relationship and there is a lot to learn from other's experiences but then you're on your own because that's when the real you comes out. The fake it til you make it.. once you get the lay and a girl wants a relationship with you she gets to know your real self so all the **** you've read on a message board no longer applies because if you're faking it you can't keep it up 24/7.

I guess the real answer is to work on yourself, be the person you want to be and if a girl doesn't find that attractive then so be it, eventually you'll find one that does and then you won't need a crutch to get you through the relationship, you can just be yourself. Because eventually that's who you're gonna be anyway.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Greasy Pig

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I think anyone who gets into an LTR should definitely stay on SS.
It's easy to get complacent once your hard work has paid off and you've secured a high quality woman.
Coming here will help keep your game sharp and reinforce what you should be doing.

My best mate who introduced me to this site recently got engaged and I asked him the other day if he still comes to these boards.
He couldn't remember when he was last here and although he's a very capable DJ, I worry he may lose his edge.
 

Voice

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I'm in an LTR and just started posting more often within the last few months. Why? Because I'm in grad school and need an outlet. I enjoy posting here more for the intellectual debate rather than advice. Though I think it's pretty important to not lose track of the core principles taught here.

Also I think I am constantly learning from being in an LTR and can offer unique perspectives for the single guys. You learn much more about women from being in a relationship than spinning plates. Not only am I learning a lot about a female perspective of things, but I am also able to critique her friends and their interactions with guys.
 

NobodyCares1

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nah... right now I'm on my way towards an commited relationship but I still plan on going here... I still want to learn and improve and this forum helps me with that...
 

SgtSplacker

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I'm a pretty easy going guy, and sometimes I have to force myself to lay down the law out of principle. Lots of the things girls do really don't bother me, and it's important to flip out every once in a while to keep em in check...
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

floydb25

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I only come here to discuss a topic that interests me, so probably. Its not something I come to learn or seek advice for. Like, once I have it "figured out", I'll no longer need it. Namely because I never had problems in this area, and whenever I did, I already knew the reason & solution. I have a damn encyclopedia of this **** in my head, so who needs a "book" (of Pook). :woo: Experience is quite the teacher.

I dont even live the kind of lifestyle anymore, or care for it, but still like to talk about it. I was always one of those technical, dissecting, grit and bones kind of people. Need to know how and why everything works, and argue with people over it. Like, having no life, if you will.

I also like to rant about crazy people, bad experiences, and telling random people they suck, and should stop sucking and making stupid decisions. It makes me feel alpha - I can even feel the alpha juice flowing through my veins while doing it.

Eat a ****.
 
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perseverance

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bigneil said:
As if perseverance had trashy women to avoid.
I'll leave them with you BigNeil. I find like often attracts like. ;)
 

JohnChops

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ArcBound said:
I take week or month long breaks from sosuave at times. While overall a good site if you keep visiting a website that basically tells you that you are doing something wrong, something not alpha, something not approved, and continually shows people with problems it eats away at your mind.

And as to the question I came to sosuave with the goal of being able to attract someone suitable for LTR. What I learned was other stuff lol

I agree with this 100%. If you keep coming here youll always find something wrong with your game or approach or really anything! The real benefactor from this site is to learn something by reading and testing it in the field. I like to think that the field is my football field and im just training/getting better at any certain aspect of my life by trail and error/pushing forward with little rest.

To the question I would still stay here. I would just keep updating my log and read a few posts .
 

Desdinova

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zekko said:
That's why I get so surprised when people say this place changed their lives or think there is unique information here you can't get anywhere else. "Unplugging from the matrix" and all that. I guess it's different coming here when you're in your teens or early 20s. And probably different growing up these days than when I did.
When you're the AFC who's trying to win women with flowers, friendship, and hope, this place certainly does change your life. The only thing I did right as an AFC is use kino to get the girl I wanted. The rest was all trademark Disney stuff I had learned from society.

As for leaving while in a LTR, I haven't. I didn't leave even when I got married.
 

zekko

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Desdinova said:
When you're the AFC who's trying to win women with flowers, friendship, and hope, this place certainly does change your life. The only thing I did right as an AFC is use kino to get the girl I wanted. The rest was all trademark Disney stuff I had learned from society.
But surely all that "Disney stuff" has to go out the window after you have a few experiences? Once you have a relationship or two, that surely must teach you that all that stuff isn't true. It must clue you in more to the "true nature of women"?

I do wish sometimes I had come here in my early 20s. It would have saved me a lot of trouble having to learn a lot of this the hard way, through the "school of hard knocks". Plus I was heavily into self improvement anyway. I kind of figured most guys in their 20s were into self improvement.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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