"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

If pick-up artists make a woman fall in love with them, what happens to her after?

The_Reaper

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 22, 2006
Messages
284
Reaction score
1
Location
Europe
I read about Pick-up guys, like Senor Fingers, David deAngelo, Mystery, et al and they seem to be sleeping with a endless amount of women, and then just forgetting about them - they're like a puff of smoke, gone.

How come we don't hear about these women getting attached, bitter and angry, "****blocking", getting depressed because they can't be with this amazing guy, refusing to accept a break-up etc?

It's like the PUAs screw women and discard them cleanly, no problems. Maybe they have a skilful method of breaking up/nexting a girl, with minimal feelings hurt on the girl's part?

I am no pick-up artist but I'm not a total retard, and when I "bond" with women they sometimes get very attached (no boaster) and usually end up getting hurt!

I'm obviously doing something wrong, and I need to project a different attitude. But still, my main question is this:

If the pick-up artists can make a girl fall deeply in love with them, how do these girls accept a breakup, or accept being a casual partner, or forgotten about? Does it not cause them pain and bitterness?

David deAngelo wrote about how an ex-gf of his casually came to his house once, and they chatted casually, and all was fine, blah blah.

My exes could not be in the same room as me, the "atmosphere" would be too messed up! Exes are like forbidden people, no longer possible to communicate with.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

KontrollerX

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 11, 2005
Messages
4,476
Reaction score
182
I think the point of PUA is just to get a series of one night stands.

When its clear that this is what both parties are after it makes sense to me we don't hear about any of their scorned women.
 

The_Reaper

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 22, 2006
Messages
284
Reaction score
1
Location
Europe
KontrollerX said:
I think the point of PUA is just to get a series of one night stands.

When its clear that this is what both parties are after it makes sense to me we don't hear about any of their scorned women.
I may have used the wrong word: PUA. Maybe I should have said Don Juan or Alpha Male, or whatever label.

If you mean that the whole ethos of this site is to get a series of one-night stands, that's obviously untrue. But I think you were referring specifically to a PUA; I was not.
 

comic_relief

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 29, 2004
Messages
3,282
Reaction score
49
Location
Baltimore, MD
I don't usually have a problem with my exes. They usually chat with me all the time.

It only becomes a problem when they don't accept that it is over. I haven't had a problem with girls that I have slept with.

I also treat them as a friend even after I have slept with them.

comic_relief
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2003
Messages
15,481
Reaction score
65
Location
Galt's Gulch
dotcomwill said:
I have this problem ALOT. Girls tend to fall head over heals once they get to know me and screw me.
I'm still trying to understand the exact problem. Unless you mislead these women, what's the problem?
 

Adrian

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 28, 2002
Messages
244
Reaction score
1
I try to see my f-buddies every once in a blue moon for that reason. After several months many of them begin to have feelings for you especially if you're fvcking them really good. I guess Mystery and these other PUA's you mention disappear after one night therefore making things a lot easier.
 
Joined
Mar 18, 2006
Messages
3,956
Reaction score
37
Don't confuse "sex" with a relationship! Virgins don't have this problem!
 

Sean Stock

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 30, 2007
Messages
14
Reaction score
0
Location
Buenos Aires
Sex after a long period of getting to know each other and sex after one or two days are entirely different. That´s the only real difference.
 
Top