"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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If I can get over this problem, I will be a DJ.

AlmostThere!

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I don't have a problem being funny. I'm attractive. I have a good job.

I should have a couple girls I'm having sex with...or a GF.

But I don't approach girls unless I'm in a warm setting (used to be school, work, parties, through friends, etc). I don't approach girls in clubs, bars, or randomly.

My brother wonders why I'm not getting a whole lot of ***** because I live near two colleges. The way he makes it seem like there's a whole lot of ***** out there that I can get. To me, getting sex is damn hard. It feels like I have to work really hard to get some booty. It's like girls always want to take it slow with me, and then I try to rush the sex which ****s everything up.


Here's my thought pattern if I see a girl in a random situation or club/bar.

* She's hot.
* I should go over there and introduce myself.
* She's really hot and probably was approached 200 times already.
* She's probably having a bad day and don't want to chat.
* I'll find someone else who looks like they want to talk.

I put all these thoughts into my head and I care too much about what "might" be going on in a chick's life.

How can I just go after what I want and not care about who's looking, the situation, or what might be on a girl's mind at the time?

Basically, is it perfectly okay to strike up a conversation with a female in whatever situation I may find myself?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Neon Owl

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AlmostThere! said:
Basically, is it perfectly okay to strike up a conversation with a female in whatever situation I may find myself?
Yes.
 

Elephant

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AlmostThere! said:
I put all these thoughts into my head and I care too much about what "might" be going on in a chick's life.

How can I just go after what I want and not care about who's looking, the situation, or what might be on a girl's mind at the time?

Basically, is it perfectly okay to strike up a conversation with a female in whatever situation I may find myself?
Yea its fine to strike up a conversation. Try not to think and just walk up and say hi. Don't wait, just act. Waiting just gives you time to think about what could go wrong. Practice talking to everyone you see that way walking up to anyone and starting a conversation seems natural.
 

Exhumed

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I just started approaching often two weeks ago and honestly, you stop caring about rejection pretty quickly. Just realize that it doesn't reflect badly on you as a person, it's her problem if you approach her and she's not interested. If she brutally rejects you, she's probably a b!tch anyway. Scan the room, and as soon as your eyes fall on a pretty girl, walk up and talk to her. Yeah, you'll be nervous as sh!t and you'll probably creep her out...just do it again, and by the time you've been rejected by five or so girls, you get a little more comfortable with it and the adrenaline rush is less severe. Really, that's about all it takes, five in a row, then it feels more like a game and less like walking into a gas chamber. But I know, the first one's a b!tch.
 
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