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RobbyDog

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...not always.

Some background: I am soon to turn 40, six foot, divorced with two children and am in decent shape. I run and visit the gym pretty regularly. All my life I've been complimented on my looks, which trust me guys, can be a real curse. Especially since I'm a pretty quiet, and rather serious guy. All sorts of women have called me hot, cute, ridiculously good looking, a heartbreaker, etc, etc but this has certainly not translated into above average success with them. Yes, I've banged some pretty hot women, however these experiences are few and far between. In my experience, an average looking guy with good game will way outmatch a good looking guy who lacks game any day. Someone here recently said that women expect above average looking guys to have above average game, which I have found to be very true.

I find that women very often play hard to get with me. Conventional wisdom around here usually says that if a woman is truly interested, she will make it easy. I'm not so sure. Most of the women I meet are from dating apps (I know, I know, not the best however I work in an absolutely male dominated industry and my hectic schedule leaves little time for a good social life). I find that often I have to put in way more effort at first...it's like pulling teeth with some of these broads...often they're HB7s in their 30s or early 40s. Some of them I definitely know are interested. I think they don't want to get hurt/played so they hang back to see how hard I'll try.

Even this one cute girl at work who I've seen around but don't know is exhibiting the same behaviour. I know from a friend that she is single. We work in totally different departments and never cross paths, so I friended her on FB and sent her some friendly messages, introducing myself, asked her if she's going to the company Christmas party. She reads the messages but doesn't reply. Ughhh. I realize I should go talk to her in person but I think that it'll be awkward now. I admittedly have never cold approached a woman while sober. I'm always just at a loss for what to say. Maybe the best bet is to be very direct, tell her I find her attractive and ask her for her number.
Anyway, not looking for any specific advice here guys, just sharing some of my experiences with the baffling world of women and am open to any suggestions on how to open up these icy broads.
 

SargeMaximus

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My experiences are the same as you OP. In my teenage years I had women approaching me regularly as well. Didn’t lose my virginity till I was 28. Simply put I don’t have game and I’m a serious type. Looks mean nothing
 

Hamurabimbi

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RD.: ‘ All my life I've been complimented on my looks, which trust me guys, can be a real curse.’.
100000000% disagree. being attractive is such an amazing blessing. I’m GL & I wouldn’t trade my looks for anything. It’s literally life on easy street.
 

Robert28

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Just because she’s making it easy for you in the first couple of weeks means NOTHING. So many women these days purposely try to speed up the “getting to know you stage” where they basically force 3 months of normal dating into a couple weeks. What I mean is they demand to see you 2-3 times the first week and every week after that and it’s still not enough for some, they demand you text then throughout the day becsuse they need that reassurance and if you miss a day they begin to lose interest and they’ll start and argument over it under the guise of “I need someone who can CoMUnICaTE”. It’s bull**** to be honest. Im thinking what I’m going to do going forward is I don’t care how well the first date goes, how good she looks, how much fun I had, I’m just going to dump them through text after the date. Im tired of being the dumpee, it’s time to be the dumper. These women freaking obsess over guys who rejected them after a date or two, so that’s what I’m going to start doing.
 

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RobbyDog

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My experiences are the same as you OP. In my teenage years I had women approaching me regularly as well. Didn’t lose my virginity till I was 28. Simply put I don’t have game and I’m a serious type. Looks mean nothing
Interesting. I think I remember you posting that you’ve never had any luck taking girls out on dates etc…you usually just invite them right to your place from dating apps? And you have decent success with that?
 

RobbyDog

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RD.: ‘ All my life I've been complimented on my looks, which trust me guys, can be a real curse.’.
100000000% disagree. being attractive is such an amazing blessing. I’m GL & I wouldn’t trade my looks for anything. It’s literally life on easy street.
Don’t get me wrong, it helps a lot. But you need decent gaming skills to go along IME for consistently good results.
 

Chowdah

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Women will play some variation of games if they believe you have a high SMV. I think I have an above average SMV, minus looks and height. Sometimes you have to play the game and have fun doing so. I’ve always enjoyed the chase and I dish it back. One eventually has to give in, if it’s the guy, it’s over since the chicks have tons of options. Spin, Hamster, Spin.
 

SargeMaximus

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But voice means EVERYTHING!
I have been told by more than a few women that they like my “cadence”


Interesting. I think I remember you posting that you’ve never had any luck taking girls out on dates etc…you usually just invite them right to your place from dating apps? And you have decent success with that?
Yes dating apps and “straight to sex” as my date model is working for me. Although this year it seems women aren’t as abundant as in previous years in the apps
 

pipeman84

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Conventional wisdom around here usually says that if a woman is truly interested, she will make it easy. I'm not so sure.
So you're trying to falsify the conventional wisdom using your experience with women in their 30s and 40s from dating apps? C'mon man. ;)

Even this one cute girl at work who I've seen around but don't know is exhibiting the same behaviour. I know from a friend that she is single. We work in totally different departments and never cross paths, so I friended her on FB and sent her some friendly messages, introducing myself, asked her if she's going to the company Christmas party. She reads the messages but doesn't reply. Ughhh. I realize I should go talk to her in person but I think that it'll be awkward now. I admittedly have never cold approached a woman while sober. I'm always just at a loss for what to say. Maybe the best bet is to be very direct, tell her I find her attractive and ask her for her number.
She reads the messages but doesn't reply...that's rude AF. Why would you even consider complimenting this girl to her face and ask for her number? What does that tell about your self-respect?:rolleyes:
 

characternote

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So you're trying to falsify the conventional wisdom using your experience with women in their 30s and 40s from dating apps? C'mon man. ;)
yeah, that's how I see it too. I don't think he's comparing apples with apples

My only experience with this is from two exceptionally handsome wingmen (one of whom i've written about many times in my old FR's etc) and it is indeed nutty how girls will open them and do ALL of the work. This is in bars mainly. And the girls are usually like 18-22 (so not older women, and not online dating as in the OP's example so maybe that explains the difference - or maybe it's another variable)

One of them (not the guy I mentioned a lot) does have really bad 'game' in that he's fairly quiet and doesn't seem to have a sense of humour! (we joke that it's because he's German) or 'charisma' etc (he certainly doesn't do anything that comes under the umbrella of outer-game like pushpulls and sexualising convo and breaking rapport and DHV'ing and qualifying etc) and it doesn't stop him from being able to bang very pretty young girls on nights out basically every time i've ever been out with him. I don't think any 'normal' looking dude with 'great game' would have a hope in hell of competing against them lol
 
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LARaiders85

Master Don Juan
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...not always.

Some background: I am soon to turn 40, six foot, divorced with two children and am in decent shape. I run and visit the gym pretty regularly. All my life I've been complimented on my looks, which trust me guys, can be a real curse. Especially since I'm a pretty quiet, and rather serious guy. All sorts of women have called me hot, cute, ridiculously good looking, a heartbreaker, etc, etc but this has certainly not translated into above average success with them. Yes, I've banged some pretty hot women, however these experiences are few and far between. In my experience, an average looking guy with good game will way outmatch a good looking guy who lacks game any day. Someone here recently said that women expect above average looking guys to have above average game, which I have found to be very true.

I find that women very often play hard to get with me. Conventional wisdom around here usually says that if a woman is truly interested, she will make it easy. I'm not so sure. Most of the women I meet are from dating apps (I know, I know, not the best however I work in an absolutely male dominated industry and my hectic schedule leaves little time for a good social life). I find that often I have to put in way more effort at first...it's like pulling teeth with some of these broads...often they're HB7s in their 30s or early 40s. Some of them I definitely know are interested. I think they don't want to get hurt/played so they hang back to see how hard I'll try.

Even this one cute girl at work who I've seen around but don't know is exhibiting the same behaviour. I know from a friend that she is single. We work in totally different departments and never cross paths, so I friended her on FB and sent her some friendly messages, introducing myself, asked her if she's going to the company Christmas party. She reads the messages but doesn't reply. Ughhh. I realize I should go talk to her in person but I think that it'll be awkward now. I admittedly have never cold approached a woman while sober. I'm always just at a loss for what to say. Maybe the best bet is to be very direct, tell her I find her attractive and ask her for her number.
Anyway, not looking for any specific advice here guys, just sharing some of my experiences with the baffling world of women and am open to any suggestions on how to open up these icy broads.
Because theyre in their 30s and 40s. The baggage is beyond belief. Every time you do ANYTHING it reminds them of 5-10 other guys and they get triggered to shyt. There's also a reason they're single.
 

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RobbyDog

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Because theyre in their 30s and 40s. The baggage is beyond belief. Every time you do ANYTHING it reminds them of 5-10 other guys and they get triggered to shyt. There's also a reason they're single.
True true. I find many of these women put in almost zero dating effort then complain that they can’t find a good man.
 

LARaiders85

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True true. I find many of these women put in almost zero dating effort then complain that they can’t find a good man.
one of the first things I noticed in a bad dating market was the lack of effort women put into dating, compared to the more balanced ones.
 

BackInTheGame78

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Too many guys confuse

"Women making it easy" with "Women falling into my lap without any effort put in whatsoever on my part"
 

Robert28

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Because theyre in their 30s and 40s. The baggage is beyond belief. Every time you do ANYTHING it reminds them of 5-10 other guys and they get triggered to shyt. There's also a reason they're single.
Yes! OMG! You just reminded me of a couple girls I dated for short times. If you didn’t text one day or respond right away it was “my ex husband/boyfriend used to do the same **** to me and I’m not going to put up with it!” And I’m thinking “what in the absolute fvck? Comparing me to your ex because I did or didn’t do something? Well my ex had hair and you have hair so now I’m triggered af too!” You’re right about them being single, the couple I mentioned still are very single. I even told one after she started an argument with me “you know, you tell all these stories about exes and how bad they were to you but I think it’s you who’s the problem after getting to know you” she went OFF after that.lol
 

Epicwinguy

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Right now I have no beard. I made the mistake of shaving clean I do NOT look good guys, but I was sitting alone at a bar and a girl just sat down and started flirting. A young woman.
 
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