if a girl rarely texts first does that mean she's not interested

[JPlaya]

I mean she seems interested and continues the convos. I only text like once every week or so though,so I'm not clingy.

 

[ARrocket]

When you try to escalate physically and she stops you, on separate occasions, then you know she's not interested. Until that happens, she's interested.

 

[JPlaya]

I've touched her and she didn't reject me.

 

[ARrocket]

I've touched her and she didn't reject me.

Keep escalating then. Touching, then kissing, then sexing. Keep going and you'll get your answer.

 

[JPlaya]

The problem is I'm out of school, so no contact now.

 

[ARrocket]

The bottom line is that there is no way to judge her interest level (other than the fact that she's not at the level where wants you inside of her right this second) based on 1 simple little piece of info regarding a girl and a guy nobody on here knows. You're either going to have to 1) Provide WAY more details about your past history with this girl, or 2) Stop worrying about it. I vote for option (2).

Also, just because you only text her once a week or so doesn't mean you're not being clingy. You should be spending your summer bettering yourself, and that includes focusing on OTHER women. There's not much you can do to increase her attraction via text when you won't be able to see her for (presumably) months, so keep the texting to a much less frequent minimum, and don't get sucked into the long conversations via text.

 

[mahoney]

This particular topic is like groundhog day with you jplaya! But we'll try and go through it again

The problem is 1) you text too much, and 2) you are overly fixated on getting constant reassurance from responses. In neither case are you thinking about what the texts say, just that they exist

If you have established a pattern whereby you ALWAYS text first, then how can another person ever go first? You have made it that you are the text initiator. You have established this pattern. There is literally no reason for this girl to text first

what are you actually wanting to say in these texts? And what are you wanting to hear back? judging from your many previous posts on this subject, you aren't really even saying anything in these texts, so why are you sending them?

Look at the last 10 texts you sent her. Rate them on a scale of 1-10 in terms of interestingness. Thats how interesting they were for her to receive. Focus more on what you are saying not how often you are saying it. Because if your texts are as consistently similar as your posts on here, its got to be like groundhog day for this poor girl

But basically STOP focusing on these texts. She's not going to forget you exist without some boring text saying "how has your day been?" or "goodnight".

Now it does actually seem you have learned a bit, if you are saying you text less now than you did, but its going to take a while to break out of this pattern, and althought they now seem less frequent, dont make mistake of thinking they make you look less clingy. if you must obsess about texting, then at least focus on the CONTENT not the frequency.

Do you ever email or fb chat? I think texting in general is not a good look, other than arranging stuff. email is better if you have something actually INTERESTING to talk about

Question you must ask yourself: Are you an interesting person, is what you write something that is fun or interesting for this girl to receive? If not, why is it being sent?

 

[JPlaya]

Umm i looked over the texts and they didnt seem bAd. Im also posting on a phone so the structure might be weird.Theres a history and she usually tries to suck me in long convos. I've learned to make the convos and my texts brief and concise. Judging our history, I don't think she thinks I"m uninteresting. No I don't text like that lol. Is there anyway for me to get her text me first?

 

[JPlaya]

I also don't email and she rarely gets on fb

 

[AlexDP]

You do understand that there's only one way of solving this 'mystery'?

 

[JPlaya]

What?