"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Identify your animal archetype

Dongfu

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The Pressure Causing Archetypes

I have observed several archetypes which summarize the behavior of pressure causing men. The following archetypes can typically be found in social settings, especially in bars and night clubs. It is likely that all of us have exhibited all of the archetype behavior to different degrees at one time or another. Familiarize yourself with these negative behavior patterns and begin to remove them from your identity.

The Spider: Men who exhibit spider behavior tend to hang around the perimeter, and near the doorways of social settings. They are passive stalkers, who have a very simple approach: wait for a woman to pass by and then spring into position and launch the attack. Their efforts are to ensnare, cocoon, or trap women into listening to their pitch:

“Hey baby, who are you here with?”
“Can I buy you a drink?”
“Would you like to see the inside of my cocoon?”
“NO THANKS”

Threatening surprise attacks always create negative pressure, and set up an immediate predator/victim dynamic. Women have an inherent fear of spiders and any man behaving like one.

The Snake: Snake men are slippery, sleazy characters who slither around social venues in search of a victim. They offer a drink with one hand while attempting to coil the woman with the other. They usually initiate physical contact before it is welcomed.

He may initially be perceived as charming or smooth, but his dual motives will usually be revealed, and ultimately create pressure. His mouth says one thing, but his eyes communicate something much sleazier. Although his touch may be soft and welcoming, behind it is a hungry serpent. His duality is symbolized by the split tongue of the snake. He is never out to just have fun and meet some new friends. He always has a hidden agenda. Women are highly intuitive and will usually discover they are in the company of a snake.

The Hyena: Hyena men act exactly as hyenas do in nature. The hyena’s sole mission in life is to steal the lions kill. Men of this nature will never try to attract a woman of their own. They wait and watch for another man to have some success, and then they move in for the kill.

Whether this behavior is a result of laziness, or a desire to steal another man’s find, this approach always creates pressure. Of the dozens of times I have seen this method used, I have never once seen even a small degree of success. Unlike in the animal kingdom, the prey is still alive, and therefore can judge the situation. If one man declares himself through his actions to be the hyena, then the other man must be the lion.

The Vulture: Vultures are pure scavengers who feed on dead and weakened pray. They clean up what the hyenas leave behind. Vulture behavior is characterized by circular movement throughout the venue. Vulture men will circle until they find a weakened prey: a drunk, ovulating woman for example. As other vultures pick up on the scent, they will also land until the full congregation is in attendance. It is not uncommon to see several vulture men all pecking at the same vulnerable woman. Vultures are usually in full swing around closing time at a night club.

The Used Car Salesman: Unlike the other archetypes, the used car salesman is not rooted in predatory animal behavior. His approach is an attack none the less, with his assault directed at the ear.

He starts talking, and he never shuts up. He is Pac Man in the ear, and he feels he needs to talk to appear attractive. Blah blah blah until his target finds a way to escape him. He never gives his target a moments rest to respond and react to him.

The primary reason for this is he does not want allow any space for rejection. He thinks he can wear his target down with words, unwelcome words, until she finally surrenders and say’s, “Okay, I’ll take it.” This of course never happens, so he moves on to the next victim.

These are just a few of the archetypes I have identified. Please list any other types you have observed, as well as an explanation of their behavior.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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KarmaSutra

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Good thread . . .

. . . though slightly disconnected from the content and title. I assumed this was about identifying your Power Animal or Jungian Archetype but it's about those smarmy, hidden creatures for us to look OUT for and make sure we do not supplicate ourselves to becoming them.
 

Dongfu

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KarmaSutra said:
. . . though slightly disconnected from the content and title. I assumed this was about identifying your Power Animal or Jungian Archetype but it's about those smarmy, hidden creatures for us to look OUT for and make sure we do not supplicate ourselves to becoming them.
I studied Jung in college. This thread, however, is primarily about behavioral patterns in men who are not successful with women, and create negative pressure for the women they do approach. These are some of the negative characteristics I have noticed in men, and they bare a striking resemblance to the behavior of predatory animals in nature. Some men exhibit several of these attributes. He could be a spider/vulture, or a snake/hyena etc. In any case he is frightening women away with this behavior. I am only attempting to identify it and bring it into the light so others can see, "hey I kinda do that sometimes," and stop doing it.
 

KontrollerX

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*Laughs*

Good list Dongfu but psychiatrist Al Bernstein author of Emotional Vampires would disagree with you about Used Car Salesmen types of which he has a chapter in his book titled for as a type of personality sociopaths the ultimate human predator assume in order to sell themselves to their prey.
 

Dongfu

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KontrollerX said:
A type of personality sociopaths the ultimate human predator assume in order to sell themselves to their prey.
I didn't make the list in an order of worst to best, but I was implying that the used car salesman archetype is what you are describing here - one of the ultimate pick-up predators - all the archetypes are attempting to sell themselves, with little or no success - they just go about it differently.

I will check out this book. Thanks for the tip
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Maxtro

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What about

The slug: Slugs move so slow you can't even tell he's moving. For whatever reason slugs may be waiting to be noticed and then they would either be picked up, stepped on, or have a run in with a saltshaker.
 

Dongfu

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Maxtro said:
What about

The slug: Slugs move so slow you can't even tell he's moving. For whatever reason slugs may be waiting to be noticed and then they would either be picked up, stepped on, or have a run in with a saltshaker.
Excellent

This is a Passive AFC Archetype, as opposed to the above mentioned Aggressive AFC Archetypes. There are definitely several others we can list. Thanks for the contribution.
 

The Bat

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So, what's the ideal archetype? A lion/tiger/cheetah?

What about a penguin? Penguins are cute, cuddly, and slide around well. Kinda like a nice guy, eh?
 

SinJester

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I have probabaly been most like the snake haha. Changing that though.
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

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Dongfu

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The Bat said:
So, what's the ideal archetype? A lion/tiger/cheetah?

What about a penguin? Penguins are cute, cuddly, and slide around well. Kinda like a nice guy, eh?
A good animal archetype is any animal that exhibits desirable qualities. It may sound laughable, but I observe some pimp a$$ roosters around my property. I will see two or three females come out of the bushes followed by the male. These are his girls and any other rooster that gets too close gets taught a fast hard lesson. Sometimes the rooster will run one of his females down, grab her by the neck and just hold her down for a second, just to keep it fresh in her mind who is running the show. He fvcks when he wants and does what he wants without exception.

Obviously most guys would want to identify with the lion - King of the jungle - the alpha of all species. However, because it is unrealistic that every guy will become a lion, I feel that just "cat" should suffice, be it lion, cheetah, domestic, or whatever. They all share similar qualities.

Cats attract you to pet them and give them attention without doing anything. They are aloof and charming all at once. They dont really care who their provider is, and they are difficult to piss off.

However, before you can become an ideal archetype, you have to identify and change negative archetypal behavior patterns. That is what this thread is about.
 

Maxtro

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I love cats.

You description of cats is pretty good but you left out one thing. Even though domestic cats and the bigger cats are very similar they have one thing very different. The big cats are wild. If you piss them off, they can kill you. Heck even if you don't piss them off they can still hurt you. They can not be domesticated. They just let you think that they are.

As for how to make a lion or tiger into an archetype. It's possibly a cool laid back dude that is obviously very powerful. He fiercely protects his own and he may often hurt people if they came to close to doing him wrong.
 

DonutMan

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How about the DOG:
The Dog may be mans best friend, but they also will do anything for your affection. The male version of the DOG is the dude that is obnoxiously loyal to females, and does anything he can to suck up.
 

Dongfu

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DonutMan said:
How about the DOG:
The Dog may be mans best friend, but they also will do anything for your affection. The male version of the DOG is the dude that is obnoxiously loyal to females, and does anything he can to suck up.
Yes, and on top of that, male dogs are desperate to fvck anything in site, including each other. They have no self respect and can be easily broken and tamed. I meant to list Dog, but it is likely the most commonly known animal archetype. Interestingly, we have an entire culture who identifies with "dog." "Wussup dog?" Dog is a male *****, and isn't very cool to idolize as an archetype IMO.

If you must identify with dog, then it should be a wolf. Wolves are the exception, and have very interesting social lives.
 

Huffman

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I'm particularly interested in cats vs dogs.

You can go up to virtually anybody and ask them "which one do you like better?"
Not only will you have a nice conversation since everybody seems to have a strong opinion on this, but what's interesting is:
You take one look at the person and you can predict their response. Even more so if you know the person. Try it for yourselves!

But what does this mean for us?
Do we choose the pet that represents our personality?
Or do we pick the one that represents our desired partner's personality? Could it be that the pet you had as a kid molded your personality?

I'm curious about your thoughts.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

Read more...

Dongfu

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Huffman said:
I'm particularly interested in cats vs dogs.

You can go up to virtually anybody and ask them "which one do you like better?"
Not only will you have a nice conversation since everybody seems to have a strong opinion on this, but what's interesting is:
You take one look at the person and you can predict their response. Even more so if you know the person. Try it for yourselves!

But what does this mean for us?
Do we choose the pet that represents our personality?
Or do we pick the one that represents our desired partner's personality? Could it be that the pet you had as a kid molded your personality?

I'm curious about your thoughts.
This is interesting, but it is not related to the context of this post. This post is about archetypal behavior patterns, not real pets.
 

Huffman

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I find that, in the context of a pet, people identify themselves with certain animal traits and incorporate those into their personality.
Meaning you can derive the animal archetype from a person's behaviour.

As such, I think it is not entirely out of context.
 

Dongfu

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Huffman said:
I find that, in the context of a pet, people identify themselves with certain animal traits and incorporate those into their personality.
Meaning you can derive the animal archetype from a person's behavior.

As such, I think it is not entirely out of context.
You are right, it is not completely out of context. You can adopt the behavior patterns of some pets. But no one has a pet spider, or a hyena or a vulture as a pet, but somehow they have still taken on the characteristics of these animals.
 

saber

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i can identify with the vulture, heyna and spider and think that its less personality and more situation 4 me
 

Dongfu

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saber said:
i can identify with the vulture, heyna and spider and think that its less personality and more situation 4 me
An honest man. We have almost all behaved like all the archetypes at one time in our lives.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

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