I'm currently confused. I have been dating my girlfriend for over three months now, and I know it's still early, but sometimes you can't help getting that feeling that you have found the one. Up until this point, everything has gone very well...we are both college students, and we have a lot of fun together; by ourselves, and we both have good groups of friends. Up until just recently, I have noticed that my girlfriend has been acting slightly different. Earlier on in our relationship, she had no problem telling me how much she liked me, and that she has never liked someone as much as me, and that she couldn't wait til the next time she saw me, etc...things like that. In the past few weeks or so, I have definitely noticed that she doesn't do things that like nearly as much, and I asked her recently if something was wrong, and her reply was, "I don't always feel comfortable always telling you how I feel because it makes me feel vulnerable." At first I had no idea what this meant, and was very confused. Isn't this the same girl that has told me so many times how crazy she is about me, and that I am the first boy she has ever loved? Why would she feel vulnerable telling her boyfriend how she feels about me? Sometimes I feel like the woman of the relationship because I am telling her more about my thoughts, where normally that's the girl doing it. I don't mean that I'm some super sappy guy who is constantly saying 'I love you' every two seconds, but lately I feel like I have been expressing how I feel about her much more than her for me. I hear there's a honeymoon period when a couple first goes out, where they are crazy over each other, and I wonder if I am just overexaggerating about this, and if I should just chill out. But even though the honeymoon period is over, isn't it normal for her to still tell me how much I mean to her every once in awhile still? How do you guys interpret this....Thanks
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
"I Would Feel Too Vulnerable..." ???
- Thread starter A-Man2151
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"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
KontrollerX
Master Don Juan
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Yeah even after the honeymoon period ends she should be telling you how much you mean to her every once in a while.
It seems your gut instinct has detected something rotten in denmark with her.
What it is currently you do not know, but do not let your guard down.
When a chick starts acting different than her standard normal behaviour with you something is wrong.
It could be something a little wrong or something very wrong.
Just know that the gut instinct never lies.
It seems your gut instinct has detected something rotten in denmark with her.
What it is currently you do not know, but do not let your guard down.
When a chick starts acting different than her standard normal behaviour with you something is wrong.
It could be something a little wrong or something very wrong.
Just know that the gut instinct never lies.
Dude you should NEVER tell a woman too much about how you feel. Let them do that, and just because she does it, it doesn't mean you have to immediately reciprocate. Do it very sparingly and ofcourse she has to earn that kind of respect. Treat your feelings like they're a very special part of you. They should be. If you're to tell a woman how you feel about her she has to EARN it. Too much, too soon and too consitently is NEVER a good thing.
If she isn't being consistent with her behavior and you feel that she may be losing interest then it's likely that you aren't enough of a challenge or mystery for her. She likely takes you for granted. You don't want her to feel like she "has" you. That only brings boredom. And about the vulnerability part... It's probably bs on her behalf as well. She could probably see herself losing attraction in you and is confused about you and the relationship. Think of it as something along the lines of "It's not you, it's me".
The problem with these kinds of girls is that they don't know how to break it off with you so they
1. try to instigate fights and arguments and attempt to piss you off
2. make you break up with them or make you seem like the bad guy who they had to break up with.
3. stop answering phone calls and AVOID you.
You're probably doing other things as well to lower her interest that you're not even aware of.
If she isn't being consistent with her behavior and you feel that she may be losing interest then it's likely that you aren't enough of a challenge or mystery for her. She likely takes you for granted. You don't want her to feel like she "has" you. That only brings boredom. And about the vulnerability part... It's probably bs on her behalf as well. She could probably see herself losing attraction in you and is confused about you and the relationship. Think of it as something along the lines of "It's not you, it's me".
The problem with these kinds of girls is that they don't know how to break it off with you so they
1. try to instigate fights and arguments and attempt to piss you off
2. make you break up with them or make you seem like the bad guy who they had to break up with.
3. stop answering phone calls and AVOID you.
You're probably doing other things as well to lower her interest that you're not even aware of.
Well I know that I want this relationship to last...aka, I don't want to mess this one up...what kinda of things can I do to ensure that the relationship stays interesting and that I continue to intrigue her and we still have a lot of fun...What you said about 'making it a challenge for her still'....I understand that to the point of keeping her on her toes, but also, if I sometimes act like I'm ignoring her, how can that be good for a relationship by blowing her off sometimes?
A-Man - what's your situation outside of the relationship? Are you busy with your own things that don't involve her? Sports, hobbies, friends?
I wouldn't suggest just ignoring her, but get busy with other stuff once in a while so you're not being clingy. It's actually healthy for your relationship.
I wouldn't suggest just ignoring her, but get busy with other stuff once in a while so you're not being clingy. It's actually healthy for your relationship.
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
She could have easily just avoided answering by saying, "Nothing's wrong" or "I've just had a lot on my mind lately" or some other bullsh1t. The fact that she admits feeling vulnerable around you tells me she's probably telling the truth. Her IL is probably still at decent levels.
But remember to keep being a man. Don't sap up and become a wuss just because you've already got the girl. Being a man is what you are; learn to accept it on a permanent basis.
And Phat Elvis is right.
But remember to keep being a man. Don't sap up and become a wuss just because you've already got the girl. Being a man is what you are; learn to accept it on a permanent basis.
And Phat Elvis is right.
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