PigAdlemPimp
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 23, 2006
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Have you ever met a hot babe, pretty face, beautiful long hair, sexy body, but a pvssy so fvcking ugly that you just couldn't stick your d!ck in it, I have 
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
I Won't Fvck Hot Babes With Ugly Pvssies
- Thread starter PigAdlemPimp
- Start date
Have you ever met a hot babe, pretty face, beautiful long hair, sexy body, but a pvssy so fvcking ugly that you just couldn't stick your d!ck in it, I have "Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Kings_royalty
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Jun 7, 2006
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All pussies are ugly...haven't you heard the term 'bumping uglies'? :woo:
logicallefty
Moderator
I agree that all pvssies are ugly.. Does this answer the grand question of "do looks matter?" For men, maybe it's a clear cut NO THEY DON'T. After all, if men refused to fvck all women with ugly pvssies, human beings would extinct wouldn't they?!
I refuse to say all pussies are ugly. there are some perfect pussies that you'd wanna bury yer face into forever!!!
but anyway.. rings a bell dude, rings a bell...
The thing is in my case i fell for a girl whoz boobs never saw eachother.. nipples grew to the size of a marble, she was fat and her p_u_SS_Y could even scratch her ankle if she wasn't looking..!! but thats 'love' - i fell in love with her and overlooked all of that.. now where am i?? she cheats on me!! hahaha - life is soo funny!
anyway,
NEXT.
but anyway.. rings a bell dude, rings a bell...
The thing is in my case i fell for a girl whoz boobs never saw eachother.. nipples grew to the size of a marble, she was fat and her p_u_SS_Y could even scratch her ankle if she wasn't looking..!! but thats 'love' - i fell in love with her and overlooked all of that.. now where am i?? she cheats on me!! hahaha - life is soo funny!
anyway,
NEXT.
spider_007
Master Don Juan
i used to know a striper who had a huge cli*t. I mean this thing was like 1 inch long... we used to joke around how she would bend me over and fvck me with it.
damn, just saying that feels so wrong!!!!!!
damn, just saying that feels so wrong!!!!!!
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Quiksilver
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 30, 2006
- Messages
- 2,813
- Reaction score
- 55
I was hottubing the other night(st.pattys) and for some reason me, my buddy, and 6 girls decided to go skinny-dipping...We were pretty drunk...
Anyways, some of these girls had the nastiest cooches I've ever seen. At first I almost had an uncontrollable reaction of jumping out of the tub and running. Most of them were fine, but with two of the girls there were like extra folds of skin around the ***** dangling down two or three inches and one of the girls was pretty lopsided.
The rest were ok, so it wasn't too painful to sit in the tub.
Anyways, some of these girls had the nastiest cooches I've ever seen. At first I almost had an uncontrollable reaction of jumping out of the tub and running. Most of them were fine, but with two of the girls there were like extra folds of skin around the ***** dangling down two or three inches and one of the girls was pretty lopsided.
The rest were ok, so it wasn't too painful to sit in the tub.
Man there are some beautiful pu ssies out there... some wonderful ones!! but then you got that "the skin outside looks like a roastbeef sandwich is peeking out" and man.. that ain't sexy. I can't even imagine eating that.
Most of the chicks had been pretty blessed to me so far..one had the lips pouring out and I was drunk so I didn't even try to find the hole - i just told her "You stick it in"
Interestingly enouhg, I didn't have too much trouble with pubic hair. I had like 3 in a row that werent' shaven.. I can deal with it..but yeah i'd prefer clean kitties.
Boobs are important to me. I love tits. I want them bigger but FIRM. I don't want to dissapear on the sides when she lays down on her back. I don't want pepperoni nipples. Oh! One girl I hooked up with had AMAZING tits, but when i was sucking on her nipples i could only find ONE!!! it was dark so I couldn't check for sure, but damn, one nipple?
One chick confessed to me she used to mastrubate with beer bottles, so i nicknamed her long neck
Fun times, and spider - LOL YOU HOMO
Most of the chicks had been pretty blessed to me so far..one had the lips pouring out and I was drunk so I didn't even try to find the hole - i just told her "You stick it in"
Interestingly enouhg, I didn't have too much trouble with pubic hair. I had like 3 in a row that werent' shaven.. I can deal with it..but yeah i'd prefer clean kitties.
Boobs are important to me. I love tits. I want them bigger but FIRM. I don't want to dissapear on the sides when she lays down on her back. I don't want pepperoni nipples. Oh! One girl I hooked up with had AMAZING tits, but when i was sucking on her nipples i could only find ONE!!! it was dark so I couldn't check for sure, but damn, one nipple?
One chick confessed to me she used to mastrubate with beer bottles, so i nicknamed her long neck
Fun times, and spider - LOL YOU HOMO
Teflon_Mcgee
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 3, 2006
- Messages
- 918
- Reaction score
- 27
WTF!?!?!?!?MANtle said:
This is funny! Are you for real?
Socialreject
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 9, 2005
- Messages
- 409
- Reaction score
- 4
Beefcurtains?
Man i can't tell you how much i hate it when they got beefcurtains hanging out, and then you have to kind of bend them aside you know, so the whole things looks like a blown up gofer... eegh.
And then you got your typical camel toe... i guess some guys find that sexy, but i think it looks weird, it's like you're sticking your d1ck into a lunch-meat sandwich, and if the chick has short trimmed pubes it's almost like sandpaper and you fuk yourself raw in no time. Looks better than beefcurtain, but if it's not shaved i prefer beefcurtain to sandpaper any day!
I don't really have an issue with pubic hair... That is to say as long as it's not jungle sized so tarzan gets lost in the woods. Should definitely be properly trimmed! Have to say though, for simplicities sake nothing beats clean shaved, or a nicely trimmed landing strip... i don't really like having pubic hair in my mouth and all that... meh.
Now i realise not a lot of guys are clean shaved, but seriously, it's not like the chick needs to navigate her tongue through a pube jungle to suck the lolly pop now is it? I don't think that argument flies here at all.
I guess it's something a lot of guys 'notice', maybe one is more picky about it than the other, but i wouldn't say it's extraordinary to have a preference at all.
Man i can't tell you how much i hate it when they got beefcurtains hanging out, and then you have to kind of bend them aside you know, so the whole things looks like a blown up gofer... eegh.
And then you got your typical camel toe... i guess some guys find that sexy, but i think it looks weird, it's like you're sticking your d1ck into a lunch-meat sandwich, and if the chick has short trimmed pubes it's almost like sandpaper and you fuk yourself raw in no time. Looks better than beefcurtain, but if it's not shaved i prefer beefcurtain to sandpaper any day!
I don't really have an issue with pubic hair... That is to say as long as it's not jungle sized so tarzan gets lost in the woods. Should definitely be properly trimmed! Have to say though, for simplicities sake nothing beats clean shaved, or a nicely trimmed landing strip... i don't really like having pubic hair in my mouth and all that... meh.
Now i realise not a lot of guys are clean shaved, but seriously, it's not like the chick needs to navigate her tongue through a pube jungle to suck the lolly pop now is it? I don't think that argument flies here at all.
I guess it's something a lot of guys 'notice', maybe one is more picky about it than the other, but i wouldn't say it's extraordinary to have a preference at all.
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
I don't eat em.. at least not yet. May be Ill save this one for some special chick..right now all I give em is dic k.
And there is hair on your shaft too ..i remember a chick had to stop like every minute cause she kept on catching the hairs, but honestly, if a chick knows what she is doign she should have a hand on the bottom part and go to town only on the top 1/3.. AND make noises AND use her tounge.
lazy hoes i tell ya man!
but i love when they kiss the belly and go allll the way down
rsxtreme
Don Juan
mmm roast beef
Chosen1
Master Don Juan
Man some vaginas worry me. I mean I would love to get into most of them but yeech. But I guess that comes with the territory.
That's probably not as uncommon as one might think. I imagine varying degrees of hermaphroditism are expressed in a small percentage of the human population. It probably wouldnt hurt for this chick to check for Kleinfelter's syndrome as well since someone with that disorder would want to be aware of what goes along with that (such as being sterile).spider_007 said:
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
IrReSiStIbLe
Senior Don Juan
LOL what is that supposed to mean bro?? lolCremasta said: