I wonder why

[Metro3pilot]

Just a thought, maybe some others do this as well .. maybe we can learn from each other

I wonder why someone, ( me ) would give more wieght to a sign that a chick don't like you, than a sign that she does.

( example )

she does not return your calls ... next, she's not interested etc

she takes and returns your calls, and tells you when her next day off is ... I wonder if she likes me hmmmm should I call her and ask her out

see what I'm saying ?

I'm really starting to get iriitated by this because it basicly stalls my azz and then I never make a move and it's just with some girls, not all

anyone have any suggestions ?

:rockon:

 

[squirrels]

When you're expecting something, you're more likely to see signs that it WILL come to pass than that it WON'T.

It's a confidence issue. Too many men have been convinced these days that women find them ignorant and disgusting by nature and that they have to do something to "compensate for their intrusion".

Which is totally untrue. And which is why you see ignorant jackholes that you think are beneath these women constantly walking right up to them and getting favorable responses.

Contrary to what Good Charlotte says, girls DO like boys.

 

[Interceptor]

If you ask most people what they're greatest insecurity is they will usually say something along the lines of feeling 'not accepted" by people in general.
If you ask most people what they're greates FEAR is, they will usually say something like "sharks" or a "tornado" or whatever.

But the way the human mind works is that most of our greates fear is the Fear of the UNknown.
A black vacuous space. Where there is NOTHING. Emptiness.
Nothing to relate to.

Most people are hardwired to negative or fear based reactions.

Few people have trained them selves to Respond to challenges with a Positive response.


Since most people fall into the habit or self limiting, negative beliefs when in doubt, it is assumed that in a situation where we doubt if we are being accepted, we will usually conclude that we are in effect NOT "accepted".

rejection

This is due to early trauma that instilled a negative belief, and one only reinforces it due to habit and ignorance.

Now, getting to the emptiness or vaccum of NOT KNOWING...

What happens when we are insecure, and not accepted and are facing this VOID of not knowing?

We fear it.

Why?

Because we fear the worst.

What is our worst?

Our deeply held belief that we hold.
"I am not good enough."

What is this called?

PROJECTING.

Wea re in effect projecting our deepest negative beliefs onto the crcumstance.


Guy meets and talks to girl, then asks girl for number.

Girl happily gives it to him.

Guy calls girl.

Girl never answers or returns messages.


Vaccum.

"Why doesn't she answer?"

"Am I not good enough for her?"

No answer.

"Am I not good looking enough?"

No answer.

Projection to resolve this issue.

PROJECTION.

Conclusion:

"She's not returning my calls or answering becasue I'm not good enough or good looking enough for her. I suck."


We project our deepest insecurities onto the unknown. What we see when there is a vacuum is ...............









US.

 

[Phyzzle]

I wonder why someone, ( me ) would give more wieght to a sign that a chick don't like you, than a sign that she does.

This may sound odd, but I think you're just getting wiser!

Signs of negative interest are always more reliable than signs of positive interest. Attention whres show that they like you all the time, but one or two signs of low interest will tip her hand.

 

[joekerr31]

im not sure i see the confusion.

to me its pretty simple.

if a woman talks to me or smiles at me, then on some level she is interested in me and its a green light to pursue things further.

if a woman disrespects me, it doesn't necessarily mean shes not interested in me (as many women are disrespectful by nature), but it does mean that she's a woman that i am no longer interested in.

for me its less about whether they are interested in me, and more about whether im interested in them.

IM the prize, not them.

 

[iqqi]

she does not return your calls ... next, she's not interested etc

she takes and returns your calls, and tells you when her next day off is ... I wonder if she likes me hmmmm should I call her and ask her out

anyone have any suggestions ?

I would suggest not assuming anything.

For instance... her taking your call and returning = just being polite. Right? That is what people do. When the phone rings, they "take" it. And if you leave a message, they call you back. Saying "Yeah... I'm off tomorrow..." is small talk, just conversation.

If YOU want to ask her out, you should.

With your other example, of her not returning you calls = not returning your calls. Instead of trying to assume or figure out why, just take it for what it is. You should want someone who will return your calls, by the way.

If she just stops returning calls, it might be that she isn't interested, might be she died, might be she lost her hearing. She could be playing games. Really you are only in control of you. With that, I would throw it to the wind, and what happens happens. Definately don't keep calling someone who isn't returning your calls.

 

[Metro3pilot]

Thanks for the great replies everyone ...

for me its less about whether they are interested in me, and more about whether im interested in them.

IM the prize, not them.

Damn Skippy Joekker that's the attitude ....

Iqqi, I mean no disprespect and agree with 95% of your reply .....

Maybe I'm wrong, then again maybe other guys will agree with me

in my experience there is a direct correlation between answering calls/returning calls and interest level

her taking your call and returning = just being polite. Right?

I think it goes beyond that ...... Iqqi are you saying you answer and return calls of guys who have a known romantic interest in you, even though you feel nothing ...or do you blow them off and let them establish a relationship with your voice mail ??

anyone else on that subject ?

 

[ketostix]

Thanks for the great replies everyone ...



Damn Skippy Joekker that's the attitude ....

Iqqi, I mean no disprespect and agree with 95% of your reply .....

Maybe I'm wrong, then again maybe other guys will agree with me

in my experience there is a direct correlation between answering calls/returning calls and interest level



I think it goes beyond that ...... Iqqi are you saying you answer and return calls of guys who have a known romantic interest in you, even though you feel nothing ...or do you blow them off and let them establish a relationship with your voice mail ??

anyone else on that subject ?

Yeah I disagreed with iqqi, but I didn't bother. Girls aren't "polite". They screen calls constantly if they're not interested. Her advice is basically be passive. A man has to do things that best influence a positive outcome and jump on windows of opportunity, and know when to cut his losses or as Joekerr put it know when a girl's actions go against you interests.

 

[Metro3pilot]

I think evertime I have been what could be considered " strung along " or

dealt with an " attention ***** " I can look back and say ...my game was

just was not strong enough ..... so I'm not sure those things are anything

more than a myth .............

Im my lifetime I have been rejected enough to know, when a chick is not

interested you have no doubt in your mind about it ...... and not taking your or returning your

calls is one of the signs



:rockon:

 

[betterthandead]

This is why guys got to stay cool when it comes to dumb crap that girls throw at us. If a girl doesn't call back I usually shrug it off because 1. she's not my wife 2. i could be dead the next weekend, why worry over one person?

 

[Desdinova]

she takes and returns your calls, and tells you when her next day off is ... I wonder if she likes me hmmmm should I call her and ask her out

I always take the attitude of "If she's not interested, then she'll let me know." That's why I never bother wondering if the woman likes me or not. She will make herself clear when she doesn't want to spend time with me. Until she decides to move on, enjoy your time with her! :cheer:

 

[guru1000]

HEY Metro,

What if I tell you, you are not confident!!

Even if you get a number and she is INTERESTED, by time the you leave a message on her voicemail, there will only be a 50% chance that she will return your phone call.

MIND BOGGLING??

What if I told you, the same scenario with me. If i get a number from a girl who is INTERESTED, and leave a message on her voicemail, 95% of the time, she will return my call.

What's the difference between us?

CONFIDENCE!

You are not projecting confidence because you aren't confident. Simple, isnt it?

YES, through a voicemail, your confidence will show.

And yes if a girl returns your call, she is interested. Make plans!

If she does not return your calls, she is not interested. Correct!

She might have had initial interest, but because of your lack of confidence shown through your voicemail or actions there after, she is not interested.

 

[Metro3pilot]

you know exactly what I'm saying Guru .......

not many, but some woman .... I can't visualize a positive outcome and that leads to " Paralisys by analisys "

It bugs the shyt out of me and I'm trying to change it because I know it's cost me more than a few times

:rockon:

 

[iqqi]

I think it goes beyond that ...... Iqqi are you saying you answer and return calls of guys who have a known romantic interest in you, even though you feel nothing ...or do you blow them off and let them establish a relationship with your voice mail ??

anyone else on that subject ?

Me specifically, I won't give a guy my # if I'm not interested. But interest could mean interested in getting to know you better, not necessarily romantic interest. I've met some great people that way, and had some great friendships... some of which led to meeting someone that I DID click with romantically.

Once you've called and talked a few times, IL is going to go up or down.

You're right, phone behavior could lead to lowered IL, and higher IL. If she isn't returning your calls... NEXT.

What I was saying had more to do with your thought process in regards to the situation, then the actual motives behind the situation... because you'll never really know what those are.

Don't think so much into it.

 

[guru1000]

GURU's definition of true confidence:


CONFIDENCE- Simply not caring about the end result

 

[Metro3pilot]

Don't think so much into it.

Damn Skippy

Paralisys by Analisys

:rockon:

Actually Iqqi, I was asking about after giving someone your number ..he declares or makes his interest known and you're not interested romanticly ...

be honest Iqqi, do you still act " polite " or do you blow the guy off ??

 

[John-467]

Metro

Hahahah..Yeah Metro, dude.....that's da whole people with these guys on the site.

(IN THEIR MINDS) <<< this crazed world of opinions, facts, judgements, beliefts, religions, man's movement bullshyt, etc, etc....

They seeee women as being evil, being mean, being all this shyt...and lol lol, with the NATURAL personality of women, they are BOUND to do someting offensive AT SOME POINT, then that action REINFORCES the bullshyt going around in these guys' head.

Now listen...I'm not about to come up here and say ANYBODY IS A SAINT, I'm no fvkin saint and I HAVE SENT MANY WOMEN to Women version sites like these b/c MY AZZ wouldn't love her lol.

But see.....you guys just need to change the tune, you've got the radio, now change the tune.

1.) Think of women in a different way....enjoy them, I mean quite honestly....women are cool fvckin people...maybe if you spend time with them you would know.

2.) FULFILL THEIR NEEDS MANNNN...listen, I said THEIR "NEEDS"...do you know what their NEEDS ARE?

>>> It's not money, status, none of that shyt.

GIVE THEM LIFE! GIVE THEM A EXCITING FVCKIN SEXUAL EXPERIENCE! That's what they NEED, that's what they CRAVE, and the person that gives that to them is the nygga they LOVE......

For some reason, you guys can't grasp that...to YOU GUYS (in your minds) there MUST be someting more....

It's why I said in the other thread, this has gone from "Attracting, meeting, and dating" women to some psycho-religious, man's movement, bullshyt...that's just a group of non-sexually satisfied guys bytching about shyt THAT'S NON-EXISTENT.

-Holllaaaa

 

[Metro3pilot]

YO Pimp Daddy thanks 4 da holla ....

If I wanna slap some ho's and tap dat ass I gonna change to yo station wit da bling bling

:rockon:

 

[iqqi]

Actually Iqqi, I was asking about after giving someone your number ..he declares or makes his interest known and you're not interested romanticly ...

be honest Iqqi, do you still act " polite " or do you blow the guy off ??

Well, Metro. It depends! Nothing is ever that simple. And that is real talk.

But you probably don't want to hear that, so what I will do is tell you when I blow someone off.

I blow someone off if they BLEW IT TOTALLY. As in any kind of relationship, friendship, or whatever. OR I blow them off if they aren't making any sense. Like they call, but don't say anything. After 2-3 calls of nothing happening, I might not answer the next time they call... cuz I got better things to do!

Like p!ss you guys off.

 

[Metro3pilot]

You don't piss me off Iqqi ......

I think it's a pretty simple question and you confirmed it, are you a politician by the way ? :crazy:

If a woman is not interested for whatever reason, she won't answer or return your calls ......