I wonder how women feel

[jamesfromhouston]

When I was younger, I used to rely mostly on my verbal skills to reel women in. I'm not photogenic, but women like my face. Not instantly, but women often claimed they were attracted to my mischievous green eyes. I was obviously having fun and they wanted to be part of that.
When my eye got damaged in 2015 and I started to wear an eyepatch to shield it from direct light, I didn't like looking handicapped, but I found that instead of decreasing, my attractiveness actually increased. Women came up to me to flirt with me, something that hadn't happened previously. On one hand it was flattering, but I was also acutely aware that apparently it took disfigurement to make me attractive.
In 2021 I went with a lover to her family in Prague and she arranged for me to buy a Maine Coon kitten that I had to carry around CZ for six days before we went back to Amsterdam. After those six days, Klook was used to going everywhere with me, so instead of leaving him at home alone, I take him with me into town. He likes to observe the lower lifeforms.

The (female) attention I received before 2021 was welcome and not too intrusive, but walking around with a shoulder cat taught me what it's like to be approached constantly when you just want to be by yourself. As with a beautiful woman, people stop me in the street to talk with me, to take photos, to share about their cats, to touch Klook.

I had a lover who had long chestnut curls she was very proud of, but she was tempted to cut it off because people stopped her in the street and wanted to touch her hair. And, like with Klook, people would just touch her hair without asking permission.

It's mainly because of annoying people that I carry my cane everywhere. So I can keep the dildos at a distance.

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But, yes, I know what it feels like to be a 'photo opportunity' and the level of attention is probably close to what an attractive woman would have to deal with on a daily basis. I'm not surprised beautiful women pretend to be aloof. They love a normal conversation without people drooling over them.

Incredible story. Inspiring. Thank you for the candid sharing.

 

[jamesfromhouston]

Men and women have different motivations, and are judged by culture different. Behavior is the same. A man that has no problems getting women will behave the same way women behave. I agree it is rare, the man has to have great looks, is famous, and has a lot of disposable income does not have problems getting women.... so he really doesn't value sex. All you have to do is look at men that fit this category. For even the average woman, getting lots of men is easy, so she really doesn't value sex... it's just another biological function that has to be done like sleep and eating.

I agree with you on this. Never thought about it this way but its true I think when we have an abundance of choice, especially those of us who have experienced having a lot of plates at one point, we don't really value sex as much (at least for me). We don't have that desperation for women. At times you get tired and can't be bothered to even hangout with them sometimes and just want alone time, especially when they are needy and attention seeking. During times of plate abundance, we experience the paradox of choice where we hangout with one girl and we regret and think time would be spent with another and then by the end of it, it turns out none of them really make you truly fulfilled. I assume this is how women feel by default of having an abundance of men.

 

[jamesfromhouston]

I disagree. men will have a lot of sex with a lot of women IF THEY COULD. Woman on average do not do this. it's biological. for every woman who has slept with a hundred men, there is a man who has slept with a thousand women.

Men and women act differently. the average woman can go out and get laid by dozens of men every day of the week if she wants, but she doesn't. the average man can't do this. However, if he could he WOULD. woman want that single High value man.. she might monkey branch but that's to replace one man, with another higher value man. Men just want to F even if the girl is plain (or even ugly).

in a world where women don't discriminate men. in a world where women are as horney as men, there would be a lot more sex happening. in the gay community where there isn't a biological imperative to be "picky", there is so much more sex happening. SooooooooOoo if women were as horney as men, there would be a lot more heterosexual sex period.

even when men are in committed relationship, men still want to have sex with other women - mistress, cheating, etc.. I'm not saying women don't think about cheating. but they think about it less often... HOWEVER, when they do think about it, there's a higher chance women can make it happen.

But most women have higher body count than most BP men. I assume not that they necessarily want to initiate it but the abundance of men in their lifetimes initiate it with them and since they always have men in their orbit it's not unfathomable that this is the case.

 

[Slowhandluke]

But most women have higher body count than most BP men. I assume not that they necessarily want to initiate it but the abundance of men in their lifetimes initiate it with them and since they always have men in their orbit it's not unfathomable that this is the case.

If 100 women are going after (and sleeping with) the same top 10% of men.... yeah, these women will have a higher body count then most AVERAGE men...... but the top 10% of men will have a EVEN greater body count then these women. It will be astronomically high. Hell, read the biography of some of the sports stars. I think Wilt Chamberlin said he sleep 20,000 women. People have done the math and a lot of people have said it is in the realm of possibility. Many other celebrities have claim basically the same thing - maybe not as staggering the number... but very high numbers no less.

For every slutty groupie that sleeps with a rock star; she may have a body count of a 100, but that rock star will have a body count 100X as much or more. Hell, Genghis Khan had so much sex, that at one time in history his progeny was about 30% of Asia (or something remarkable like that); and trust me most of the sex was consensual.

 

[zekko]

When you're a good-looking woman and all these pathetic guys suck up to you, the attention quickly sours. And you see the attractive men not giving you attention because you're surrounded by these unattractive simps who are not really into 'you' but who are just horny for your body.

I think, generally speaking, that the most attractive girls are more likely to have guys following them around who fall in love with them. And the less attractive girls are more likely to have guys following them around who are horny for their body.

 

[Vanderdonck]

When you're a good-looking woman and all these pathetic guys suck up to you, the attention quickly sours. And you see the attractive men not giving you attention because you're surrounded by these unattractive simps who are not really into 'you' but who are just horny for your body. And you just wish these people would realise they have no chance, because while it sound romantic, you don't really want someone to worship the ground you walk on. Sure, it's an ego boost until you realise that they're just words to get into your panties. None of these people actually want to know you, it's all about their needs. They want to impress you to possess you, not to support you into blossoming into something more than just another pretty face.

I would think guys here would have had this experience themselves. Women simp for high value men too. Many times I've felt "awkward" or had to mention a girlfriend to get a woman to back down.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

I would think guys here would have had this experience themselves. Women simp for high value men too. Many times I've felt "awkward" or had to mention a girlfriend to get a woman to back down.

You think these guys here are high value men?

I think, generally speaking, that the most attractive girls are more likely to have guys following them around who fall in love with them. And the less attractive girls are more likely to have guys following them around who are horny for their body.

Not really.
The most attractive girls do get the most stalkers though.

And whether they are in love or just want to squirt juices all over your body doesn't really matter if you're not attracted to them.

 

[Vanderdonck]

You think these guys here are high value men?

They should be working on it, at least. Nothing is ever static. If they've taken any steps then at some point a woman will go for broke on him.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

They should be working on it, at least. Nothing is ever static. If they've taken any steps then at some point a woman will go for broke on him.

Most people here are 'self improvement collectors': they keep amassing all these techniques to make women swoon, but they don't put any of it to practice because, uhh, rejection anxiety.

I've never read so many excuses to not do something. Some of the worst cases here can quote you from all the PUA bibles, but are tongue-tied when they're confronted with a moderately pretty girl. And then whine about their 'dating problems' and never put any advice they get to work.

 

[The Duke]

@jhonny9546

3 Examples of Men Acting Feminine/Not Leading:

1. When a guy asks a girl on a date and has no plan. He lets her decide. It conveys to her that he is not decisive and won't be a good leader. She thinks he won't have her best interest in mind. He also fears accountability.

2. A guy that won't initiate. He is fearful of a negative outcome, typically rejection.

3. A guy that is afraid to get physical with a girl.

4. A guy that is too emotional.

5. He gets facials, his nails done. Does as much self-care as she does.

6. He isn't authentic. He's a people pleaser. Avoids confrontation. Too Sensitive.


All a woman has to do to connect with a man is use her femininity and beauty. Theres not much to it on her end.

A man will know he is connecting with a woman by her open body language. She will also start to give a guy compliments on his character that he displays while sharing stories that show who he is. A womans willingness to agree with what the man is suggesting is also a sign she is connecting and trusting.

 

[H8CourtshipWithAPassion]

It's a known fact that most women (even mediocre ones) have an endless supply of men chasing them and giving them attention.

I've seen this to be true through the years, even women that I know who are 6s have almost an army of simps after them and hitting them up. Some of these men have higher SMV than them as well.

I often wonder, how do women feel in terms of their experience of the dating?

I wonder because it must be so drastically different to us men and our experience of the dating.

Most of us men have to actively pursue and secure dates, partners, lays and comparatively speaking, we don't have an endless supply of women bombarding us with attention and jumping through hoops for us by default. It's an active exercise for us compared to their passive sit-back experience.

I can anticipate one outcome of it is that they become entitled but do women feel fatigue like us?

For us men, we feel fatigue when the effort we have placed into active dating and the pursuit does not lead to dates or plates that are commensurate. We feel we have expended all this effort on a fruitless chase. Of course we can meet others but it's hard for us to even create a supply of prospects comparative to the ease of women.

What about women? Do they feel the same?

Do they have a better experience than us by comparison? Do they have a better time?

well i like this mindset explanation, men are naturally by default in scarcity with women but women naturally by default are in abundance with men

 

[Gamisch]

I agree with you on this. Never thought about it this way but its true I think when we have an abundance of choice, especially those of us who have experienced having a lot of plates at one point, we don't really value sex as much (at least for me). We don't have that desperation for women. At times you get tired and can't be bothered to even hangout with them sometimes and just want alone time, especially when they are needy and attention seeking. During times of plate abundance, we experience the paradox of choice where we hangout with one girl and we regret and think time would be spent with another and then by the end of it, it turns out none of them really make you truly fulfilled. I assume this is how women feel by default of having an abundance of men.

A man's abundance is there, BUT imo its more stretched out over many years and ONLY if he actively keeps working on improving himself.

But as I said before, there will ALWAYS be balance. The biggest equalizer is the fact that most women go nuts before they hit 30.
ALL women seem to lose most of their braincells between the ages of 27/30. All the "Bad bytches " I've ever known went from bubbly personality to depressed and sometimes straight up suicidal. Like, you wonder where that cute girl went. Still looks good, but her personality takes a dive for the worst.



That's what it's like to be a woman. Going bat shyte when you about to turn 30. Because you got sold dream after dream and got played hundreds of times. The consequences of "dating easy " also means attracting tons of strangers who dgaf about you ( rightfully so)

Uhm, no thanks, I am good being a man.

On the other hand ,the men that do have the same level of abundance as hot women oftentimes ALSO ending up hating the game. Think ball players that say a man should never get married. Think a megastar like Lenny fecking Kravitz who practises celibacy despite having access to tons of women..

Bottom line is that dating without a purpose gets exhausted. A pretty woman will reach that level sooner, whereas an average might never get there. The grass SEEMS greener but its not always the case..

 

[DarwinTaurus]

But as I said before, there will ALWAYS be balance. The biggest equalizer is the fact that most women go nuts before they hit 30.
ALL women seem to lose most of their braincells between the ages of 27/30. All the "Bad bytches " I've ever known went from bubbly personality to depressed and sometimes straight up suicidal. Like, you wonder where that cute girl went. Still looks good, but her personality takes a dive for the worst.

I heard a similar anecdote recently. I made out with a girl recently whom I've known for 10 years. She's 28 now, I'm 47. There was a lot of gossip amongst the local bars of us kissing. A female friend of mine told me that the girl I kissed wanted to have kids and be married by the time she is 30, but it 'wasn't happening for her', which I found out, as she has a great personality, and is absolutely gorgeous.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

If abundance is the default state for most women. They will not reflect upon it. It just is.

 

[jhonny9546]

She might drift off and make things difficult from time to time, and when this happens you just have to let her go, and date other women... if she loves you she will come back, then you get to decide if you want her bac

Don't you think that a woman who loves you would leave you for a debate? But when you show her that you have other women in your life, she might be disgusted to come back to you? I understand what you're saying, but some women, who are truly good ones, wont take you back if you show that you're 'doing well' with other women. They may think about cheating and treat you as low value.
Please go deep down here, explain the mechanism!

She will also start to give a guy compliments on his character that he displays while sharing stories that show who he is.

This is so important. Would you mind to expand this?

 

[jhonny9546]

She will also start to give a guy compliments on his character that he displays while sharing stories that show who he is.

This is so important. Would you mind to expand this?

 

[RangerMIke]

Don't you think that a woman who loves you would leave you for a debate? But when you show her that you have other women in your life, she might be disgusted to come back to you? I understand what you're saying, but some women, who are truly good ones, wont take you back if you show that you're 'doing well' with other women. They may think about cheating and treat you as low value.
Please go deep down here, explain the mechanism!

I understand your point. But what works for me is when a woman is making things difficult, getting into arguments over insignificant things, I take that as a sign she has lost interest (for whatever reason, it really doesn't matter).... and since I can't control how she 'feels' and just move on. I just figure she's already gone, and I forget about her. You move on and date other women because it's over, and the man has to go on with life. I am familiar with a lot of PUA/relationship coaches who teach this as some kind of method to get a woman back, and while I admit that it occasionally DOES work out that way, it's always temporary and never lasts... which is fine for someone like me that really isn't interested in any long-term relationship on an emotional roller coaster.

You know you have a good one who isn't complaining all the time, b1tching about little things, happy to take what you can give her and reciprocates. If a woman is willing to leave you for a 'debate', she doesn't really love you.... so she isn't worth busting your @ss to keep her around. The man has to decide if what she isn't happy about is really a problem, and every man has a different threshold for BS, mine is pretty low, but in my opinion not unreasonable.... because it's me. I know plenty of men that but up with stuff from their wives and girlfriends I wouldn't tolerate... and that works for them... I do not judge.

I learned a long time ago that you cannot control a woman. She is going to do what she is going to do, and the man just has to decide if it is worth putting up with.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I disagree. men will have a lot of sex with a lot of women IF THEY COULD. Woman on average do not do this. it's biological. for every woman who has slept with a hundred men, there is a man who has slept with a thousand women.

Men and women act differently. the average woman can go out and get laid by dozens of men every day of the week if she wants, but she doesn't. the average man can't do this. However, if he could he WOULD. woman want that single High value man.. she might monkey branch but that's to replace one man, with another higher value man. Men just want to F even if the girl is plain (or even ugly).

in a world where women don't discriminate men. in a world where women are as horney as men, there would be a lot more sex happening. in the gay community where there isn't a biological imperative to be "picky", there is so much more sex happening. SooooooooOoo if women were as horney as men, there would be a lot more heterosexual sex period.

even when men are in committed relationship, men still want to have sex with other women - mistress, cheating, etc.. I'm not saying women don't think about cheating. but they think about it less often... HOWEVER, when they do think about it, there's a higher chance women can make it happen.

This is why so many men who think it's a great idea to have an "open relationship" when their partner is against it but finally convince them to do it are shocked when it backfires and she is getting tons of guys going after her and he has nothing.

Then of course he wants to close it back up and she wants nothing to do with that because she is riding the c0ck carousel with better looking guys than him who are likely better in the bedroom as well.

 

[Slowhandluke]

This is why so many men who think it's a great idea to have an "open relationship" when their partner is against it but finally convince them to do it are shocked when it backfires and she is getting tons of guys going after her and he has nothing.

Unless it's a high value man... To be honest, I think most average men know that it's a bad idea to have an "open relationship".. Average men have been rejected so many times, they understand the "score". If the man is average, only the really stupid.. or brainwashed men would agree to an open relationship.

 

[DJ Novice]

The experience of most average women with dating is like being in a swamp looking for a piece of dry land. They suffer the paradox of choice.

The experience of most average men with dating is like being in a desert looking for an oasis. They suffer from a scarcity mentality.

While being a woman in the dating market sounds great imagine being hit on by women rated less than 5 constantly on a daily basis. It would get annoying after a while. But unlike men women crave attention even from unattractive guys to feed their ego.