"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
I want to keep her
- Thread starter vagrant
- Start date
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
The biggest problem i see in a lot of my friends' relationships is that they are with their girl CONSTANTLY. So of course the girl ends up getting bored even if at first she loves all the attention even if it's for months.
If you set up the attitude of her always wanting just a bit more time with you then she'll always be looking forward to seeing you.
She needs to be wondering what you're doing when you go out without her. She needs to wonder if other girls are coming onto you. Of course, make her feel safe that you have absolutely no intentions of doing anything, but a little doubt in her head and her realizing you can get another girl at any time if she ever gave you reason to is a very good thing.
and never be a pushover. quote from my ex from a couple weeks ago:
"youre always so difficult. i think thats what i like. haha"
challenge! ... but balance it.
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Warboss Alex
Master Don Juan
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What, after all this time you guys have been posting about how no girl, not even supermodel-like gorgeous should be put on a pedestal? A woman is a woman, no matter how 'hot' they're perceived to be. Treat them the same, no matter what.
Just continue to be yourself - if she's interested, you won't lose her. If she isn't interested, no matter what you do, you won't keep her. I confess that sometimes I've treated my missus (the woman who I perceive as the most beautiful thing in the world, 11 on a scale of 1-to-10, and who I love more than anything) really really badly, like unspeakably badly. And she's treated me badly too. But we stayed together no matter what happened, because we wanted each other that much.
If she wants you, you won't lose her. And if she doesn't want you, nothing you can do will make her - BUT if she doesn't want you, she's not worth losing sleep over, just move on. Simple as that.
Warboss Alex
Master Don Juan
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You're in a serious relationship with the girl now right? That's great! She likes you, right? So how do you keep it going? By not messing with what works.
Just like a weights routine, if it ain't broke don't fix it..
One way to guarantee screwing stuff up is to start acting different.. just carry on as you are, and if it's gonna last, it'll last.
Glad you're happy bro!
Warboss Alex
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there's no right or wrong bro..vagrant said:
reading this site will mess with your head. I firmly believe it is a lot of absolute bollocks which applies to high school/late teen relationships which won't last anyway and when both girls and boys wanna play games, if a girl falls for the 'sosuave' approach and not the 'natural' approach then she's not worth keeping anyway, she'll just go off with the next 'sosuaver' guy.. just like the arseholes on here will next their girlfriends when someone hotter comes along because for the most part, these guys are desperate to get laid and have to resort to seduction in its most scientific and precise form.. lol.
for serious relationships all this goes out the window anyway, you're in a relationship with someone then the 'game' is over, you're together now, games have no place, you have to be yourself 100% otherwise you're building a false foundation, which will eventually lead to the whole edifice crumbling down.. and me talking in metaphors all the time.
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Its nice to hear refreshing comments every once and a while. Keep up the good work.
I came to this site a few years as a sophomore in college pretty clueless. I have since really stepped up my ability to get girls, and I am now in a long term relationship. I started dating this girl about 9 months ago. I am now in grad school about an 45 minutes away and she is a senior in college. Vagrant, I know what you mean abou tnot wanting to lose your girl. You hear a lot of stuff on this site about how you shouldnt ever actually care about a girl, but once you find yourself in a healthy relationship with a solid girl that is BS.
I see my gf usualy every weekend. I do my best to walk the line of being a challenge but still be in a healthly relationship. There isnt much info on this site about, LTRs, and i think that most of the information that is available is tainted byt hte hard care DJ types. I sometimes wonder if I am going to be able to keep her, but she has never given me any kind of sign that she wants to break up or that she is loosing interest. Still, i retain some doubt left over form my pre-DJ days. Warboss its good to hear your words of encouragement that unless I change my behavior, she probablyt wont lose interest. Vagrant - how long have you been dating your girl?
we never dated but we hang out a lot. it's been 4 months since our first kiss and in those 4 months a lot of things happened. no sex but i'm down with that cuz i'm serious about her. anyways i've known her since january and i started courting her around may. i'm no don juan. i like to have just one girl who'll stay with me. the only reason i came to this site is to learn more on how i can make a girl be more attracted to me or stay attracted or w/e women like about men that i need to know. i just found out about how confidence is one of the killer. the other night my girl got so horny for whatever reason. i wish i knew if i did something that turned her button so i can do it again. last time i sucked her nipples but she didn't let me see it. but the other night i took her bra off of her and i was eating both. i'm sure no one knows me on this site so for some of you horny dudes that was one great night. hehe seriously. i wouldn't mind doing my girl for the rest of my life cuz she's hot..hehe...that's why i need her to stay? uhh yeah lolssposter said:
skip2mylou781
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hopefully your back for real advise and you won't be such a troll
you need to kiss her, 4 months with no kissing is plain WRONG
KISS