I thought girls were more mature in college...

[The Comeback Kid]

I made a goal for myself today and went through with it. The goal? Approach the attractive girl (HB 8.5) in my weekly discussion class and do more than exchange names and a handshake. I felt that this would accomplish three things: 1.) I have nothing to lose here, so I'd talk to the HB 8.5 and see what happens, 2.) It gives me a little more experience when it comes to approaching and beginning a conversation with girls and, 3.) Give me the confidence to approach just about any girl. Well, I was able to accomplish all three things , but this girl seemed out to get me, and not in a good way.

I figured she sits in the same general area in the class, so I sat near where I think she would (I got there first). She came in a couple minutes later and sits next to me. Perfect! When she sits down, she takes out the textbook and starts skimming through what we were supposed to read this past week. Figuring she didn't read and just wanted something she could mention in the discussion, I asked her with a little smirk, "So...did you do the reading lol? What'd you think of it?" Out of nowhere, she lashes at me, "YES I did the reading! Why, did you NOT do the reading???." Somehow, I didn't miss a beat...I laughed and told her, "Yes, I did the reading as well. I just know a lot of people don't and muster up some bs to say in discussion." I kept everything upbeat, not serious at all. If I were to critique myself, I'd say maybe I should have asked how the reading went instead of "did you do the reading?" Regardless, I definitely wasn't using a serious tone and was just trying to spark some conversation. Later on...

...the Teaching Assistant (TA) puts us into small groups. Sure enough, I'm in the group with the HB 8.5. This is where I thrive...I showed off the charm, engaging the group in conversation about what we needed to talk about and a bit of other stuff too (what's your major, where are you from, etc.). Despite this, HB 8.5 still had a beef with me. For someone who is usually quiet in discussion, she was quite fiesty today. If I made a point, she was there to counter whatever argument I had. When she mentioned she lives in California, she quickly corrected me about what part of California she was from (I live on the east coast, 3000 miles away from her lol). When we rejoined as a class to talk about the topic...

...I took a stance on the material we had to read. I'm pretty good in the general subject of the class (US History), so I like to throw in a little nugget or two when making a big analysis. The TA said I made a very good point and liked my answer. Literally two seconds later, HB 8.5, who had never spoken in discussion before..."I actually disagree with what TCK said, (states her position)." The TA acknowledged that my answer was correct, since he simply jumped to the next topic after her response. :crackup:

So that's everything that happened. My first question...WHAT THE HE!! was that?? All I wanted to establish today was introducing myself to her, breaking the ice, and seeing what happens. One thing I was not anticipating was her attitude - she was firing away all class. So I was thinking...is she just a b!tch, or was this her attempt at playing games?

 

[The Comeback Kid]

One of my close friends is very smart and a very perceptive person - he picks up on things quickly. I relayed this story to him, and he had a pretty interesting take to say. He feels she is very pretentious (means she thinks she is better than others), and because I was the one who began talking to her today, she made it her mission to try and "better" me.

When I asked her if she did the reading, her defensive answer could be her trying and define her "betterness" (yes I read...did you?) The fact that she would try to correct me when we were in the small groups...she was trying to show she knew more, or was "better, than me. When she decided to pick away at what the TA said was my "very good point," she was trying to "better" me there as well.

This is what my friend believes at least, and I think he may have a point. Do you guys buy his argument? Or do you think she is playing games? Or do you think she is just a plain old b!itch?

 

[jdon23]

I'd say most likely she is a just a stuck-up *****. But there may be more than meets the eye (no transformer jokes please, lol)

It could be that she is testing how strong your convictions are. She wants to see if you will stick by your ideas even if she completely disagrees with you.

All in all, she seems way too argumentative and *****y . I would say good job on the approach, but she's not worth your time.

 

[BlakeW5]

I think your friend nailed it. Still, I'm not quite sure why she instantly went on the defensive when you talked to her (she had a bad day perhaps?). Anyway, I think it's a cross between pretentious-ness and b1tchy-ness.

I have a buddy ( I use that term loosely... I actually can't stand him but I'm nice to him when he's around), who's the EXACT same way. Anything you say or any accomplishment you make he has to instantly try to one-up you. It's kinda fun though because I use it to bait him into topics he knows nothing about and then roast him over it. I think she (hb8.5) took it to the extreme though. She's definately not testing you. Hell, if you get to feeling randy one day, mess around with her like I do my "buddy" (it's fun )

Either take another approach or forget about her. Good job on following through with everything though

 

[The Comeback Kid]

The general consensus I've received so far is that she's just a b1tch/very pretentious, so I'll roll with that for now.

I don't think she was testing me either, but it's not 100% out of the question that she was trying some sort of trick/test. I mean, she was debating me on so many things, I've never seen anythng like it. She was clearly out to get me for the most part, and I don't know why. It was the first time I met her. :nervous: Also, as was pointed out, she was like this from the get-go. I ask if she did the reading, and all of a sudden she's in attack mode. :cuss:

The approach was really the toughest thing for me today. Once I broke the ice and we split into groups, I was all set. I thrive on the small group settings in class...I take a leadership role and try to loosen everybody up. Plus, this whole experience has given me confidence for future approaches, as well as a good laugh.

P.S. BlakeW5 - While you use the bait strategy to trap your "friend", I prefer to use the hustler route, especially in class. I pretend I have no idea or know very little about what we're talking about, this girl will make some argument that has some holes and then BOOM! I go to town, dissecting why I disagree with her and use the facts to prove it. The look on her face would be priceless. :crackup:

 

[TizZle]

after the T.A. acknowledged your answer was correct you should have said "psssss" to get her attention. and said "<<your name>> 1, << her name>> 0 , you don't want none"

jokes aside, she sounds like a crazy b1tch. which 95% seem to be anyways.

 

[BlakeW5]

P.S. BlakeW5 - While you use the bait strategy to trap your "friend", I prefer to use the hustler route, especially in class. I pretend I have no idea or know very little about what we're talking about, this girl will make some argument that has some holes and then BOOM! I go to town, dissecting why I disagree with her and use the facts to prove it. The look on her face would be priceless. :crackup:

Ooooohhhh I like, I like :cheer:

How delightfully evil

 

[sprint]

well yeah she wasn't testing you. But that's besides the point. Now that you have at least some rapport going with her you can go with that. Maybe call her out on arguing with you so much (in a joking way). However, you'll really only make progress if she doesn't hate you. It's possible you just pissed her off and now she doesn't like you anymore. It happened to me once. I was trying to be funny (and it was) but the idiot girl didn't get the joke and got mad. Oh well.

 

[The Comeback Kid]

We'll see what happens...I have no expectations here and I's curious to see how this one shapes up next week...will she still be mad for w/e reason, or was it just a bad day and she will act more "normal?"

 

[DJ#7436]

So two things come to mind. She is severely repulsed by you, or attempting to win your respect. I think i'd attempt to make a move at a study date with her, focusing on how your differing opinions could make for some intense and creative discussion. If she attempts to blow you out of the water again, forget about the B!tch.

DJ

 

[DonGorgon]

Male Humans dont mature until viagra no longer works and human females dont mature until the plastic surgeon tells them NO!

 

[somebody2]

lol...
ofcos not..
they are thinking about penis 24/7....
thats why they enter college

 

[The Comeback Kid]

So two things come to mind. She is severely repulsed by you, or attempting to win your respect. I think i'd attempt to make a move at a study date with her, focusing on how your differing opinions could make for some intense and creative discussion. If she attempts to blow you out of the water again, forget about the B!tch.

DJ

Not a bad idea, but I think it's neither lol (out of your two ideas). I have decent looks and didn't do/say anything moronic, so I don't think I repulsed her upon first sight. I also don't know how she'd be trying to win my respect by lashing out at me and acting rather pretentious. I'd need to get to know her a bit more before any sort of study date. I'd also test things out next class to see if we're still "coincidentally" differing on our views for most topics.

Regardless, I am going to enjoy every bit of this. I have no feelings towards her, but this whole thing makes the class fun and not boring. Now, I have reason to look forward to the discussion...to see what twist this whole thing takes! :woo: I'm not taking any of this (my interaction with her) too seriously and just want to have a good time with it - maybe I'll have a good laugh about it.

 

[DevanE]

....

This girl is very much pretentious but most of all she is competing with you bruh!. You are a threat and I wouldn't be surprised if your a good looking guy which makes you an even MORE of a serious threat but the major factor in all this is that your outgoing and a cool dude where as she is a beeeotch!!!!. :rockon: See women like this have a perception of themselves of being the BEST at everything so their ego's can't handle the REALITY that someone out their could actually be smarter than them. (Guys can be like this too but guys can learn to turn it on and off where as women compete their whole lives with other women so when you add men into the mix it gets nasty so it's not that easy for them to balance it correctly). Now the problem is that she MIGHT actually be seriously attracted to you but because of low self-esteem she is trying to disqualify you in her head meaning trying to come up with SOME reason to hate you, like assuming your a player, arrogant etc etc...and fight her feelings thus, all the negativity and attacks against you. I also have a feeling that she might be somewhat of a feminist and seems a little bitter.

Check this out I went through the same thing but mine was a little bit worst because I ACTUALLY liked the chick. I approached her just like you did but she shut me down NASTY!!!. She was reading a book by herself one-time and I decided to go up and just initiate something with her. Man I still remember this...

*I go up cool as a cat*
Me:- Heeeey...*I sit down right next to her because she kinda knew me already and I knew her*
Me:- whatcha doing...?
Her:- uuuh...what does it look like...I'm reading a book!?!?
*Her attitude was so bad and she completely shut me down*
Me:- Oh alright...well good luck!!! *I just got up and left*.

Next day in class I go and I'm helping a couple of people out with some stuff and she suddenly blurts out:-

"...why are you helping and telling people all this stuff...??!!? you need to go sit down!!!!..."

*I just completely ignored her and went back to explaining my fellow peers but I could see the frustration in her and it was fun*.
The weird thing is that one day she decides to walk by me and wink at me while smiling which was a huge SIGN for "come talk to me" but by that time I really didn't want anything to do with this chick and had moved on.

Just thought I'd share my story but yeaa dude I wouldn't be surprised if this chick secretly has the hots for you. You know you should say something REALLY outlandish to her and really put her on the spot. Next time she interjects or says something negative to you just be like...

"...man I don't know how your BF puts up with you...!?!.."
*make sure it's loud enough for everyone to hear it and see what she says*.

Make sure you have fun and don't be intimidated by this chick...chances are she's a pretty sweet girl on the inside but just a little immature on how to deal with her feelings. Keep me up to date!!!!

 

[DonJuan11]

I figured she sits in the same general area in the class, so I sat near where I think she would (I got there first). She came in a couple minutes later and sits next to me. Perfect! When she sits down, she takes out the textbook and starts skimming through what we were supposed to read this past week. Figuring she didn't read and just wanted something she could mention in the discussion, I asked her with a little smirk, "So...did you do the reading lol? What'd you think of it?"

Mistake. She didn't do something and you are calling her on it. That's not a turn on, that's not happy, that's not easy going, that doesn't get her juices flowing. She is all stressed here and you are in her face. I would have just let her be. You don't want to be talk or be around girls who are stressed. You want to talk and be around them when they are happy.

Out of nowhere, she lashes at me, "YES I did the reading! Why, did you NOT do the reading???."

It's not "out of nowhere". Put yourself in her position, how would you respond? How do you know she wasn't working the late shift last night and was too tired to do the reading?

Somehow, I didn't miss a beat...I laughed and told her, "Yes, I did the reading as well. I just know a lot of people don't and muster up some bs to say in discussion." I kept everything upbeat, not serious at all. If I were to critique myself, I'd say maybe I should have asked how the reading went instead of "did you do the reading?" Regardless, I definitely wasn't using a serious tone and was just trying to spark some conversation. Later on...

Even "did you do the reading" wouldn't work when she is frantically trying to read the pages assigned. Again, put yourself in her shoes. You would be annoyed too

...the Teaching Assistant (TA) puts us into small groups. Sure enough, I'm in the group with the HB 8.5. This is where I thrive...I showed off the charm, engaging the group in conversation about what we needed to talk about and a bit of other stuff too (what's your major, where are you from, etc.). Despite this, HB 8.5 still had a beef with me. For someone who is usually quiet in discussion, she was quite feisty today. If I made a point, she was there to counter whatever argument I had. When she mentioned she lives in California, she quickly corrected me about what part of California she was from (I live on the east coast, 3000 miles away from her lol). When we rejoined as a class to talk about the topic...

So that's everything that happened. My first question...WHAT THE HE!! was that?? All I wanted to establish today was introducing myself to her, breaking the ice, and seeing what happens. One thing I was not anticipating was her attitude - she was firing away all class. So I was thinking...is she just a b!tch, or was this her attempt at playing games?

Don't take everything so personally. Her "feistyness" could have been from:

(1) No time to do the reading
(2) Working late the night before
(3) Skipping breakfast
(4) Breaking up with her bf
(5) Car broken down
(6) Lost her keys
(7) Friend is getting married and she's not
(8) Too much drinking the night before

I doubt she wanted to teach you a lesson about girls and sex during you TA class. Plus, it sounds like you weren't afraid to show off that you did the reading to everyone in the class.

 

[DevanE]

....

Don Juan, even though it's a possibility I highly doubt it would have caused her to lash out at him like that repeatedly throughout the class THAT was completely un-warranted. I could understand her reading or whatever but that doesn't mean you HAVE to be rude with people and try to cut them down to size like she was doing. Women usually give short and direct answers when they don't want to talk to you but plain out bit**yness is not normal. See you know one thing I never understood that you brought up about him "showing off" in class. What point would it be to go to class and not participate in discussions about the material and most of all ask the teacher pertinent questions that could help you better understand the material...? If someone does their homework WHY not engage themselves in class to see how much they have learned...?. I don't feel that is "showing off" at all better yet I feel people like that have much more confidence in themselves than anything by not giving a sh** what anyone thinks in the class and NOT being like everyone else...scared to speak up or ask questions.

 

[ElStud]

Just ignore her attitude man. It's like a bully sort of, if she sees what she's doing isn't affecting you she'll stop. And overall, you're in college man! Why are you tripping over one girl when there are literally thousands of probably better looking girls throughout your college? You shouldn't be wasting your time getting caught up in one girl. Overall I see a girl being mean or b*tchy as one huge sh*t test and by reacting to it, you're failing the test. Pass the test though and she'll probably be nicer to you and show more interest than ever before.

 

[The Comeback Kid]

DevanE - Competing, eh? I like the sound of this...it'll add a little spice to the class (esp. since I know the topic). I had a similar situation last semester in a journalism class. A really uptight guy didn't care much for my laid-back demeanor in a "competitive" class. He did a little better than me at first when it came to grammar and such (I can't figure out interjections and prepositions and such) and I think he felt justified. And then the Prof. finally let us go out in the field and do our own assignments. During the first in-class one, the kid comes up to me and basically says, "TCK, what are you doing? You really need to start doing the work here!" I laughed, b/c I knew what I was doing, and I was in no rush for time like he was. When we got the assignments back and I did a little better, his reaction was priceless. I continued to do better in the class throughout the 2nd half of the semester b/c I geared the assignments toward my strengths. What does this show? I'm definitely competitive, but I put up a laid back demeanor up front. - it's not a fake thing, but I'm not the type of person to act as if they're real competitive, I'm the sleeper.

Alright back to what you had to say. I feel I look pretty decent (I have a very good physique) and came ready to play (for the class), so maybe she sees me as some sort of threat? Possibly. Attracted to me as well? We will have to see. I mean it's possible but I don't know any girls who go about being a b!tch to a guy they're initially attracted to. I wouldn't be surprised if her repeated b!itchiness was some sort of front that will test me to see how I react the next time around. Then again, she may just be a b!tch.

DonJuan11 - Ah, I figured someone would bring this up. Definitely a valid point, I addressed it in the original post. However, I mentioned two things that hurt your argument a little. First, I did not come off as serious when I asked her about this. I had a smile and asked it real casually. The TA doesn't "check" who reads and who doesn't, it's not a big deal. Heck, I don't even read all the time. If someone asked me about it, I'd probably laugh that they caught me lol. The second point, as DevanE said, I wasn't showing off. As I mentioned, I don't always read. I know a lot of away-from-the-textbook things about the subject, so I can hold my own in a discussion here anyways. We get participation credit for talking in class, and after being a mute for the first class, I felt the need to redeem myself here by stating a few points.

 

[The Bat]

She sounds like a real ball buster. I bet you she would be an all or nothing in bed. Either freaking amazing or a dead lay.

I think your real life friend's analysis was down to a tee. Only thing I would add in his analysis is that she might or might not be attracted to you.

Believe it or not, push and pull works great with chicks like her. You pull her in by letting her "win" an argument. But do this very sparingly. Other times, you keep pushing her and point out flaws in her argument.

And you can tease her too whenever she tries to discredit you or speak out against your point. Tease the hell out of her.

I think she may be trying to test how tough your balls are. And whether or not you react to her. So far, you've done well. I'd say ante up and start teasing her.

In the end, just have fun at her expense. You've got absolutely nothing to lose anyway.

 

[Darth]

"I thought girls were more mature in college"

Nope.