"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
I think this will be my last post on this site
- Thread starter Scion
- Start date
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
This is your problem, Im pretty sure someone has talked about it before but to put it less eloquently, when you feel good about yourself you look good, its not about knowing its about believing, you project how you feel.Scion said:I don't normally get numbers or make outs at clubs. This girl was one of the exceptions. Most girls straight up reject me. Which pisses me off since I'm a great guy ( good personality, good looking, going places in life). And while I know that I'm great I feel like I'm a piece of sh1t.
theres a saying i think but cant remember. any help?
I heard this other way of it being put on the radio today: happy + active = attractive
Probablybecause her friends were taking her home so I went for the number. I doubt I'd of been able to take her home with me anyway, she doesn't seem to move very fast.Alien said:How come that you are in a club making out with a girl and you ask her for the number? I dont know what to say for such a thing.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
The Mad Ghost
Senior Don Juan
That site has like 10 members dude.joe henny said:try zenmack.com
Most chicks strait up reject anyone who tries. I contend that the best get rejected the most, they just don't care as much. When you know there are good women out there who will eventually be receptive to your advances, you tend not to care about the ones who show nothing. You can't take it personally. maybe they have a boyfriend and are in a good relationship - do you think they are going to botch a good thing to hook up with some average dude like you at a bar? A lot of guys tried it to my gf, and they ended up indirectly buying me drinks, lol! Women are bombarded by men all the time, so don't think you are anything special by being guy # 1028.Scion said:I don't normally get numbers or make outs at clubs. This girl was one of the exceptions. Most girls straight up reject me. Which pisses me off since I'm a great guy ( good personality, good looking, going places in life). And while I know that I'm great I feel like I'm a piece of sh1t.
So my question to you is this ; what makes your personality or who you are stand out amongst the sea of guys? Ask yourself critically if you have as great of a personality as you claim. From what I read on this thread, you seem average and frustrated at best , but you might be different in person. Personality will trump everything else, especially if you hit the gym and look halfway normal. (lets not turn this into a looks thread, we are all roughly the same in this regard)
In your first post you were so pessimistic about yourself. Then you are in a club and just doing the right things. You just need practice as it was stated. That is the missing key. And dont say "im trying to hit the gym", "im trying to socialize", ...DO things! forget the try attitude.Scion said:She seemed interested by giving the usual subtle girl signals. I picked up on them, took her hand and lead her to the dancefloor. Some dancing, she's showing off for me. I lean in for the kiss.
About asking her phone number...
From my experience ...a club is not a good place to find relationship material. It happened to me a few times that we made a date after the club thing, and it was not the same... There was no sexual tension i was totally uninterested in her. We could not even have a decent conversation.
I wouldn't say I'm totally pessimistic about myself. Though I will admit that women's rejections have/are making me doubt myself.Alien said:In your first post you were so pessimistic about yourself. Then you are in a club and just doing the right things. You just need practice as it was stated. That is the missing key. And dont say "im trying to hit the gym", "im trying to socialize", ...DO things! forget the try attitude.
About asking her phone number...
From my experience ...a club is not a good place to find relationship material. It happened to me a few times that we made a date after the club thing, and it was not the same... There was no sexual tension i was totally uninterested in her. We could not even have a decent conversation.
The gym I am going to. Currently I'm going 3 times a week to do weight training, with at least a day of rest in between. However, starting next week I want to go 6 days a week, 3 doing weight training, and the rest just doing cardio. The only day I'm gonna take off is sat, since I want to go out fri night. I'm planning on going to the gym in the morning when I wake up (like 6:30), so it doesn't interrupt my work schedule in the evening.
Yeah, I'll agree that clubs suck for meeting women (unless you are only after ONS). The chick I met was more of a social circle meeting, it's just a coincidence that it was at a bar (could have easily been a house party, or just drinks at a restaurant). However, having said that, she's been pretty much no contact in over a week. I know she was moving yesterday and today, but my instincts are telling me something's up (either she's not interested or is playing some fvcked up games).
...once a girl is not interested there will be just head-games and excuses.Scion said:...(either she's not interested or is playing some fvcked up games).
About the gym: 3 times a week is perfect. In the high school i had a buddy whom i talked a lot with about bodybuilding. He went to the gym on monday, wed., frid. and had a biceps ...i`ll tell you in centimeters 44-45cm which is BIG. He had been doing bodybuilding for 3 years then ...with no steroids or something just protein powder, creatine etc.
Im going to the gym now that im in college.
Things i`ve learnt: twice a week is nothing, 3 times is OK. But dont do something like this:
monday: pectoral muscles and legs
wedn: biceps and back muscles
friday: legs and cardio
...cause this way you exercise ...lets say your biceps... once a week ...which equals nothing. Plus it will be in your head that you have to do this exercise 120 percent ...and then you will do it asymmetrically etc.
Exercising in the evening is better cause after that your body will have a good rest. Plus in the morning you dont have as much energy... but school and work are the FIRST.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
the only reason I was thinking the morning was because it fits my schedule better. In case you didnt know I'm going into my last year of my degree and between my classes, client meetings (part of my grad project), and work I don't have tons of time. Most of my days will start at 11-12 (expect on thurs, have scheduled meetings at 9). I've been doing this program so far (started it about a month ago). Here's what I'm thinking for a schedule:Alien said:...once a girl is not interested there will be just head-games and excuses.
About the gym: 3 times a week is perfect. In the high school i had a buddy whom i talked a lot with about bodybuilding. He went to the gym on monday, wed., frid. and had a biceps ...i`ll tell you in centimeters 44-45cm which is BIG. He had been doing bodybuilding for 3 years then ...with no steroids or something just protein powder, creatine etc.
Im going to the gym now that im in college.
Things i`ve learnt: twice a week is nothing, 3 times is OK. But dont do something like this:
monday: pectoral muscles and legs
wedn: biceps and back muscles
friday: legs and cardio
...cause this way you exercise ...lets say your biceps... once a week ...which equals nothing. Plus it will be in your head that you have to do this exercise 120 percent ...and then you will do it asymmetrically etc.
Exercising in the evening is better cause after that your body will have a good rest. Plus in the morning you dont have as much energy... but school and work are the FIRST.
Mon morning: Weight training + cardio (cardio before or after?)
Tues morning: Cardio
Weds morning: Weight training + cardio
Thurs evening (since I don't work and have meetings in the morning): Cardio
Fri morning: Weight training + cardio
Sat: nothing, recovery day from fri night
Sun morning: Cardio
Scion said:the only reason I was thinking the morning was because it fits my schedule better. In case you didnt know I'm going into my last year of my degree and between my classes, client meetings (part of my grad project), and work I don't have tons of time. Most of my days will start at 11-12 (expect on thurs, have scheduled meetings at 9). I've been doing this program so far (started it about a month ago). Here's what I'm thinking for a schedule:
Mon morning: Weight training + cardio (cardio before or after?)
Tues morning: Cardio
Weds morning: Weight training + cardio
Thurs evening (since I don't work and have meetings in the morning): Cardio
Fri morning: Weight training + cardio
Sat: nothing, recovery day from fri night
Sun morning: Cardio
Can I ask why is it cardio so important to you? Doing some sport, want to loose weight?
"Weight training + cardio (cardio before or after?)"
Lets say you exercise and you do it hard ...when you finish it you just want to eat and lay on the bed for at least half an hour. So i cant imagine doing cardio after that.
If you do a "little" cardio before the weight training its good because your body pumps a lot of stuff into your blood which gives you energy.
I looked at that program. It is OK, that swapping A and B is a clever thing
...but those 3x5 = 15 reps ...for me it seem very few.
I used to do something like this: warmup + 4x(8-10)
I've always had issues with my cardio. So I'd like to train a bit of cardio. Plus I want to get back into martial arts. And the additional fat loss would be nice.Alien said:Can I ask why is it cardio so important to you? Doing some sport, want to loose weight?
"Weight training + cardio (cardio before or after?)"
Lets say you exercise and you do it hard ...when you finish it you just want to eat and lay on the bed for at least half an hour. So i cant imagine doing cardio after that.
If you do a "little" cardio before the weight training its good because your body pumps a lot of stuff into your blood which gives you energy.
I looked at that program. It is OK, that swapping A and B is a clever thing
...but those 3x5 = 15 reps ...for me it seem very few.
I used to do something like this: warmup + 4x(8-10)
For cardio I'm just thinking of running on the threadmill a bit, maybe 20-30 mins on a weight training day and 45-50 mins on a non training day.
The think the point of the program isnt lots of reps but your supposed to be increasing the weight incrementally each time you do it. You more push yourself to your lifting limits (from what I understand). I've only been doing that program a short time so the results arent huge at this point, but I've heard good things about it.
Scion said:I've always had issues with my cardio. So I'd like to train a bit of cardio. Plus I want to get back into martial arts. And the additional fat loss would be nice.
For cardio I'm just thinking of running on the threadmill a bit, maybe 20-30 mins on a weight training day and 45-50 mins on a non training day.
The think the point of the program isnt lots of reps but your supposed to be increasing the weight incrementally each time you do it. You more push yourself to your lifting limits (from what I understand). I've only been doing that program a short time so the results arent huge at this point, but I've heard good things about it.
That 20-30 min running will not affect the weight training. Im not a bodybuilder or something so i cant give you any real advice on that program.
Personnally i rather used to decrement the weights as my muscles are getting tired. Give it a try.
the cardio isn't for weight training. It's just for general physical fitness. And I do have a bit of fat over my abs I'd like to get rid of.Alien said:That 20-30 min running will not affect the weight training. Im not a bodybuilder or something so i cant give you any real advice on that program.
Personnally i rather used to decrement the weights as my muscles are getting tired. Give it a try.
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
kingsam
Master Don Juan
scions virtually identical thread from RSD nation
hes got basically the same responses there as he did here....
http://www.rsdnation.com/node/163521
hes got basically the same responses there as he did here....
http://www.rsdnation.com/node/163521