frivolousz21
Master Don Juan
Mr code? how is florida? do u still live there?
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Originally posted by MrCode
Come on, this is all just bullsh!t. Sure, some women may not like you for various reasons, but that is their problem, not yours! All this crap is just excuses you make to yourself for why you don't even try!
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
lol, I never said I was gangly, and I never tried to "make" it as a dancer... the dance instructor thing was just another way to pick up girls. But after I saw the way the dance schools ripped off poor symps both males and females, I just couldn't be a part of it.Originally posted by Player_Supreme
Your 6'6 and you taught dance...no wonder you never made it as a dancer. You were too tall and gangly.
Florida is OK. I've lived here my whole life so for me it is all pretty standard. Though I've only been in South Florida for about 5 years. South Florida is almost a completely different state compared to further north. These hurricanes have been a b!tch, though my house did OK.Originally posted by frivolousz21
Mr code? how is florida? do u still live there?
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Originally posted by MrCode
Let's see how many more limiting beliefs you guys can come up with?
How about if you wear less than a size 10 shoe women will be repulsed by you.
Or if you make less than $80,000 a year no woman will want you.
Or if your face is not perfectly symmetrical with a strong jaw line and perfect nose you won't ever get laid.
Or if your teeth are not perfectly straight and white no girl will want to kiss you.
Or if your clothes are not the top of the line Armani with $400 shoes you won't get any play.
Come on, this is all just bullsh!t. Sure, some women may not like you for various reasons, but that is their problem, not yours! All this crap is just excuses you make to yourself for why you don't even try!
If you LA guys stop before approaching a 9 because you are under 5'7 or whatever excuse, you are rejecting yourself! Why not leave that up to her? Because in reality there is as good of a chance she will like you as not, if you at least try.
By the way, I'm so passionate about this because I use to do this sh!t all the time. "I'm too short, my teeth aren't perfect, my house isn't a mansion, I have a pimple, my nose isn't perfect, blah blah." All it ever got me was an empty bed.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
yes yes, I read yours after I made my post; didnt realize you'd already gone through and covered it. Anyway yeah, DeAngelo's stuff got me started in the right direction a few months ago, but then I got impatient and found this place. there's so much conflicting advice, such as dave's "never smile" to dj's "always smile." this is the one I'm most confused about, especially since I'm a big Dave-ist.Originally posted by MrCode
I also like DeAngelo's stuff, and the post above that TyTe`EyEs quoted is heavily influenced by DeAngelo's ideas.
Thank you Mr. Code! That is on point. Anything can be a limiting belief if you let it.Originally posted by MrCode
Let's see how many more limiting beliefs you guys can come up with?
How about if you wear less than a size 10 shoe women will be repulsed by you.
Or if you make less than $80,000 a year no woman will want you.
Or if your face is not perfectly symmetrical with a strong jaw line and perfect nose you won't ever get laid.
Or if your teeth are not perfectly straight and white no girl will want to kiss you.
Or if your clothes are not the top of the line Armani with $400 shoes you won't get any play.
Come on, this is all just bullsh!t. Sure, some women may not like you for various reasons, but that is their problem, not yours! All this crap is just excuses you make to yourself for why you don't even try!
If you LA guys stop before approaching a 9 because you are under 5'7 or whatever excuse, you are rejecting yourself! Why not leave that up to her? Because in reality there is as good of a chance she will like you as not, if you at least try.
By the way, I'm so passionate about this because I use to do this sh!t all the time. "I'm too short, my teeth aren't perfect, my house isn't a mansion, I have a pimple, my nose isn't perfect, blah blah." All it ever got me was an empty bed.
Tell your grandma to shut up and make me a quilt and bake me a pie like a real grandma.Originally posted by Ice Cold
Nobody likes short guys. My grandma used to talk about it.
"What kind of a man is a short man? It's not a man. It's a toy. A real man is tall"
Go figure.
Where's the "middle finger" emoticon?Originally posted by Fatality
Tell your grandma to shut up and make me a quilt and bake me a pie like a real grandma.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.