"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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I think a problem I have is...

ItsOnNow

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I don't know who I am. I don't know where I fit in,I don't know how mature I am,I haven't worked my ass off and gotten where I needed to go, I haven't improved where I want to. I feel adrift. I feel like I am sometimes out of touch with reality. It could be insecurity or anxiety. Alot of it has to do with long periods of loneliness,I realize this cause I have never approached anyone. I can shut down sometimes instead of working through it. I have always thought it would just happen,that's not true. I have been reading on plentyofffish.com as well. ALot of the same subjects come up on there. I was just reading about nice guys,I wouldn't qualify myself as that,as I have many tendencies,done somc fvcked up things,such as I once almost killed someone in a drunken rage,only after they had stabbed me in the back though. I have had little college experience,not into bar/club scene,although would like to be,and am always in this slump. It's driving me nuts.
 
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"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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MooseGod

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Truth be told man, nobody really knows who they are or where they're going. Sure, some might have a vague idea, but plans are always flexible. Better opportunities might come up. You've just got to be confident in your abilities and "keep on keepin' on."

A lot of people seem to agonize over the meaning of life....fact of the matter is, there is no meaning but what you make for yourself. Just find something and go for it. Find a passion, an obsession. Something that keeps you pushing ahead. Everything else will pretty much fall into place after that.
 

Interceptor

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ION,
what you have to realize is the VALUE of NOT living life like you do.
You must assign a VALUE to that which you believe will provide you comfort and happiness.

Since you are not placing enough value on that, it is hard for you to make any strides toward that goal.

Do you value food?

Water?
clothes?
shelter?


All these things have value.
And in a life threatening situation I'm sure you'll want to secure those things for yourself.

You probably wouldnt hesitate.


So why arent you taking steps to get those issues handled?
 

Interceptor

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Who you ARE has NOTHING to do with 'others perceptions' and 'what you have'!
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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ItsOnNow

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I don't know. It feels like I am in this constant slump,one that involves hot having a woman gf,I have been reading alot this pua stuff,and realize where I have head my head up my ass or in the clouds.
 

Mavrick

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It's not who you are that you do not know, but it's a lack of believing who you are. You don't stand up and show a self belief. Your self-talk is rife with self doubt. Insecurity is a lack of belief in yourself.

Don't go on some long, endless journey to find yourself because you're right there. Everything you ever knew about yourself is more than anyone else will ever know. Until you start believing in who you are, no one else will.

Until you stand up for yourself, you'll always be beat down by whatever life throws at you. You shouldn't allow anyone the ability to define who you are. Only you can do that, and you do it daily.

What you portray about yourself is what people will see in you. Have some self-respect and stop stripping yourself of your dignity. It's time for you to own who you are. Only you can make believers out of others.

You know who you are, but you fear what other's think of who you are is why you don't allow yourself to be that person that you are.

Love yourself always and above all others. Never put anyone above yourself. If you defend yourself and stand up for yourself with boundaries drawn by self-respect, there isn't any way anyone could step on your toes.

You know who you are, and you don't have to search. Find your boundaries to defend who you actually are and to define who you are. Don't let anymore of this crap in your head bring you down. People will only respect you until you respect yourself. You cannot love others until you love yourself.

Good luck, Bro!
 
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