so last night im makin out w this girl on her bed and things get all passionate and we start undressing. we're both 21 yo virgins but she doesnt know i am or that i know she is [her friend let it slip out]. so i make my entrance only to realize that im not hard. i can thank my brilliant idea to lighten my load before i wentover to her house bc i feared id blow too quick for that. so she gives me oral and i think she may have started crying or something cuz she started whimpering almost. i ask her whats wrong and she says giving head makes her nose run and eyes water. so she stops, gets dressd and we just go to sleep. needless to say, i feel like ****.
Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single
She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.
You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.
The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.
i suck
- Thread starter dice
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
The Bad Ass Canadian
Master Don Juan
sorry to kick you when you're down but....
:crackup: :crackup:
Don't worry, in a few years you'll see the hillarity in this story.
Man, that was funny hahahahahahaha
My apologies for being an ass, but something about the eyes water and runny nose thing just really made me laugh out loud.
:crackup: :crackup:
Don't worry, in a few years you'll see the hillarity in this story.
Man, that was funny hahahahahahaha
My apologies for being an ass, but something about the eyes water and runny nose thing just really made me laugh out loud.
Qmanchoo
Don Juan
Giving head makes her nose run and er eyes water? rofl terrible excuse.
If she liked what was going on she would have grabbed a tissue and kept rolling.
$100 says she was probably thinking that she didn't turn you on...because you were not hard...and was all upset about it!
I'll be honest, I've experimented with some different drugs in the past as I'm sure most people have, and I once took something which side effect prevents you from getting an erection ( A type of pain killer)...unfortunately that same night was the first night I ended up having sex with my then new GF of 1 month (doh!)...details aside I wasn't able to...rise to the occasion and she took it to heart thinking I didn't turn her on (because naturally you should be rock hard when a chick has her lips wrapped around your little soldier)...she got a little misty eyed but I explained the entire situation, she understood, and we waited for a while until the effects wore off.
You need to handle these things like a man in the MOMENT not let them slide...because that negative feeling she has will stay if you don't turn it into a positive or neutral one.
If she liked what was going on she would have grabbed a tissue and kept rolling.
$100 says she was probably thinking that she didn't turn you on...because you were not hard...and was all upset about it!
I'll be honest, I've experimented with some different drugs in the past as I'm sure most people have, and I once took something which side effect prevents you from getting an erection ( A type of pain killer)...unfortunately that same night was the first night I ended up having sex with my then new GF of 1 month (doh!)...details aside I wasn't able to...rise to the occasion and she took it to heart thinking I didn't turn her on (because naturally you should be rock hard when a chick has her lips wrapped around your little soldier)...she got a little misty eyed but I explained the entire situation, she understood, and we waited for a while until the effects wore off.
You need to handle these things like a man in the MOMENT not let them slide...because that negative feeling she has will stay if you don't turn it into a positive or neutral one.
I was so f*cking nervous my first time that I had trouble getting hard too. I was worrying about all this other sh!t like when to do what...if I'm gonna be a disappointment...etc. Eventually I had to just shut down my thoughts by closing my eyes and taking deep breathes, and only after doing that for a little bit was I finally able to become hard as a rock and we banged....for like 2 minutes LOL.
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Life-Trainee
Master Don Juan
You should've went down on her first in that case
Badmannaz
Master Don Juan
hahahahaha grab a tissue and keep rollin hella funny.....
man somethin is wrong because even if i did bust the load before i left and hooked up you best believe I would have been harder that chinese arithmatic when i took off her clothes.....
how wasn't you hard??? I'm so horny i get hard just makin out!!!
Qmanchoo
Don Juan
lol no of course you don't say that.
And btw the reason you could not get it up is NOT because you jacked off, it's because you were nervous as hell man! Be honest with yourself here! If this girl really loves and/or cares about you and you share these things with her in the moment it's fine (As long as you don't come across as a girly man) In this case breaking the tension a little. Reassure her that she's sexy, that she turns you on, that you love X about her body because it's so cute...all that shyt counts during sex with nervous girls.
What you should have done is taken charge a little, I like life trainees response because it would have worked well in your case and shows what experience teaches, turn it around and go down on her! After 15 minutes she'd probably be moaning and groaning so much in the ecstasy of her first orgasm that you would have instantly been turned on yourself and Mr Winky would have stood up like super man on steroids.
When you are perfectly comfortable (no odd tensions keeping you from getting it up) you should be able to get it up once every 15-30 minutes at a young age.
Another $100 says she's feeling terrible about it right now that A. She didn't turn you on or B. She didn't do something right and she's a sexual failure
Come clean man, "hey, I was a little nervous it was my first time too (don't be ashamed), and tonight’s going to be even better"
btw. if you need any tips on sex just check out the tips forum, there must be something in there, or you can PM me or any others that offer assistance.
You can do this man, the first time is never the best
jesus chrsit - I just re-read that and fixed all the typos.
And btw the reason you could not get it up is NOT because you jacked off, it's because you were nervous as hell man! Be honest with yourself here! If this girl really loves and/or cares about you and you share these things with her in the moment it's fine (As long as you don't come across as a girly man) In this case breaking the tension a little. Reassure her that she's sexy, that she turns you on, that you love X about her body because it's so cute...all that shyt counts during sex with nervous girls.
What you should have done is taken charge a little, I like life trainees response because it would have worked well in your case and shows what experience teaches, turn it around and go down on her! After 15 minutes she'd probably be moaning and groaning so much in the ecstasy of her first orgasm that you would have instantly been turned on yourself and Mr Winky would have stood up like super man on steroids.
When you are perfectly comfortable (no odd tensions keeping you from getting it up) you should be able to get it up once every 15-30 minutes at a young age.
Another $100 says she's feeling terrible about it right now that A. She didn't turn you on or B. She didn't do something right and she's a sexual failure
Come clean man, "hey, I was a little nervous it was my first time too (don't be ashamed), and tonight’s going to be even better"
btw. if you need any tips on sex just check out the tips forum, there must be something in there, or you can PM me or any others that offer assistance.
You can do this man, the first time is never the best
jesus chrsit - I just re-read that and fixed all the typos.
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HalfAddict
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 23, 2005
- Messages
- 773
- Reaction score
- 29
- Age
- 43
Don't choke it next time dude...
Grab one of those extra sensitive condoms...
I went for 2 hours my first time cause of that damn thing lol.
Grab one of those extra sensitive condoms...
I went for 2 hours my first time cause of that damn thing lol.
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
DonMEgaHoss
Don Juan
The whole crying and nose running reminds me of the movie 'Stealing Harvard' When the man dude bangs his girl she cries until the end. That was a funny read... Ahhh your gonna make me bust a gut. Anyways I feel sorry too. But she got dressed to sleep? Wtf. Yeah you should of gone down on her atleast. Warm her up a bit. Girls are like diesel engines. Just work it then they get horny as hell. Then you get practically raped... There's always another chance with her or another
The first time I went soft, went '**** it', and went to bed. She probably felt like ****.
The next morning I went at it for like 2-3 hours before I gave up...and this continued for months until she learned to do kegels.
So it's not that bad. I suggest she learn kegels...then again if she's a virgin I've heard it's amazing stuff
The next morning I went at it for like 2-3 hours before I gave up...and this continued for months until she learned to do kegels.
So it's not that bad. I suggest she learn kegels...then again if she's a virgin I've heard it's amazing stuff
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Alphathree
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Aug 4, 2005
- Messages
- 404
- Reaction score
- 1
DUDE, was it CLEAN?
Kegels?Originally posted by PeeGee
The first time I went soft, went '**** it', and went to bed. She probably felt like ****.
The next morning I went at it for like 2-3 hours before I gave up...and this continued for months until she learned to do kegels.
So it's not that bad. I suggest she learn kegels...then again if she's a virgin I've heard it's amazing stuff
diablo
Master Don Juan
AE...
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.