ok... my girl n i have been together for only 4 months.. but i really really care about her... and she cares about me.. but ok the thing is. like this past month we kinda ran out of things to talk about.. like i KNOW it's bound to happen. but iunno.. she keeps thinking about our first 3 months and missin those times.but i talked to her about it and she sed that the happiness i give her now is better.. but its just different. cuz i guess b4 it was puppy love.. now we are more comfortable with each other.. i really really care about this girl and i KNOW she does too... but lately it just feels like we're kinda of drifting. any idea how to get tha old spark back??... OH BTW i recently got in a car accident.. so as of now i dont have a car... ANOTHER THING IS I WANNA TRUST HER.. BUT I HAVE A HARD TIME BECAUSE OF PAST RELATIONSHIP...
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
I Seriously Need Some Help Please!!
- Thread starter dlin87
- Start date
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
#1 This is a new relationship, she is a new girl. Don't drag your past relationship issues into this, as it will destroy the relationship. Make her earn her trust, but don't project your last relationship on this one
#2 As for not knowing what to talk about, that happens. The honeymoon is over, now it is time to get to living. This is were the ones who are ment to be together and the ones who had a quick fling get seperated. LTR's are all not kissing and hugging, they are work and comprimise. If it was meant to be, you guys will grow closer, if it wasn't you will drift apart. That is the nature of things, and it is a good thing no matter what way it turns out
If you guys stay, good for you, if you drift, be happy you had the good time you did, and figure out what about you and here didn't mesh and look for that in the next relationship. It will be a learning experience
Let this stuff happen natural, and don't force it. You will be much happier in the end
#2 As for not knowing what to talk about, that happens. The honeymoon is over, now it is time to get to living. This is were the ones who are ment to be together and the ones who had a quick fling get seperated. LTR's are all not kissing and hugging, they are work and comprimise. If it was meant to be, you guys will grow closer, if it wasn't you will drift apart. That is the nature of things, and it is a good thing no matter what way it turns out
If you guys stay, good for you, if you drift, be happy you had the good time you did, and figure out what about you and here didn't mesh and look for that in the next relationship. It will be a learning experience
Let this stuff happen natural, and don't force it. You will be much happier in the end
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
thanks a lot guys!! i really appreciate the help!. ONE LAST QUESTION THOUGH.. you guys sed dont call her as much. but i never do.. she always calls me... and i dunno how to hang up with her.. because she doesnt wanna hang up.. even if we're not talkin she wants to just stay on the phone!!... and i really do enjoy talkin to her....
My best advice to you is this:
If you are looking for an LTR (which seems to be the case) just be yourself, be natural. If she likes you for you (without the false DJ act) then you will be happy with her, and you won't have to keep questioning what can I do to keep her (just like you are doing now) belive me, it will become a life long struggle.
If you are not looking for a LTR, just follow the guidelines outlined around this forum, they will hold her attention for a little while, but once she realizes that this isn't the real you, or you realize the whole relationship was based on false pretenses (she likes a "fabricated you") it will fall apart
If you are looking for an LTR (which seems to be the case) just be yourself, be natural. If she likes you for you (without the false DJ act) then you will be happy with her, and you won't have to keep questioning what can I do to keep her (just like you are doing now) belive me, it will become a life long struggle.
If you are not looking for a LTR, just follow the guidelines outlined around this forum, they will hold her attention for a little while, but once she realizes that this isn't the real you, or you realize the whole relationship was based on false pretenses (she likes a "fabricated you") it will fall apart
That's a good sign! Well best thing is to say before hand that you are going to be busy for the day or next couple of days (and really be busy, don't bs), tell her that she can call but you can't talk for too long.
Go hang out with your friends, hang with the fam if your cool with them.
Go hang out with your friends, hang with the fam if your cool with them.
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.