"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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i sense possible low IL but could be wrong?

pete101

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i picked up with latina last weekend in a cafe. she was going back to her country in 10 days cos her uni applications were rejected so her visa was expiring. she was waiting on 1 last app and if that was rejected she'd book a flight home. anyway i text her on tues.

me: hola, hope u had a good night out on Sat & feeling better. fingers crossed about your last app decision. x
2mins later her: yes, fingers crossed! thank you :)
me: hopefully u get to stay then u can enjoy my company some more! ;) haha. we should meet up before u leave, it might be the last time we see each other.. cant let u miss out on that. :) how's tomorrow or thurs?
(no response) tonight her: hola! i have been accepted in the uni :) how are things with you?

i have to take this as attention seeking as she completely ignored my text to meet up not even acknowledging it. am i right in thinking she just wants to see if im still interested but not interested herself? should i reply with something like: 'that's good news. it must be because of me as your good luck charm. you should reward me for helping ;)'
i am aware that if she wanted to meet she would have suggested it, am i right?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

FairShake

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I personally don't believe in cutesy text messages if she isn't your girlfriend. They have their important place and it's not with a girl you barely know.

Offer to meet her for drinks or coffee. In fact tell her you are going to be at such-and-such bar or coffee shop and she should stop by to celebrate. Go there and have a good time with or without her.
 

pete101

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i see, so offer specific meet up time and place.

in my mind i feel i already offered, she didn't agree and follows up with the atypical attention seeking type message of 'how are you?' just to see if im still interested.

i get so many of these year on year i've become immune so my instinct is to assume attention seeking. however i still haven't learnt what's the best way to get her reinterested which i think is impossible. you just next and move on.

i think i'll consider sending something short congratulatory and be uninterested i.e. punish her for not responding or acknowledging my meet up text, make her work harder for my attention.
 

alxrose04

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With it being technically "early" in your relationship, I wouldn't look too much into it. It seems like you guys hit it off. I wouldn't go with the "reward me" idea. There's a chance she might see that as attention seeking. Just keep the same frame that she likes you and invite her out. Keep assuming the attraction until she blatantly tells you no.
 
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