I need to relax

[Gammergq]

Guys I am to stiff and not chilled out in conversations. I try not to but everytime I talk to a women I get in a try hard mode where I become tounge tied and I do not enjoy the interaction how could I change things?

 

[Rhoto]

Stop being intimidated by women for starters.

Start meditating, that is a sure fire way to reduce mental/physical tension.

 

[true romance]

Pratice to talk to women everywhere you go

grocery, cashier, coffee house..etc

engage in any conversation

 

[WC2]

Why do you care what women think of you? Let alone women that you may never see again. Notice that the men who pickup women are the ones who care about the women the least.

 

[Fleshy99]

Stop being intimidated by women for starters.

Start meditating, that is a sure fire way to reduce mental/physical tension.

Meditating will do wonders for you, you should look into it. I've gotten past so many mental blocks over the last few years its not even a joke.

Also I agree with everyone else here, honer and respect a women when she's possibly might be right one for you and show that you can do that, but until those days come you need to just think of it as conversation and thats all.

 

[ItsOnNow]

"Why do you care what women think of you? Let alone women that you may never see again. Notice that the men who pickup women are the ones who care about the women the least."

But why? The whole "bad boy" thing, what about someone who is honest,kind and caring? Do they like that? Or is it "nice guys" finish last?

 

[Telos]

Can we please stop rehashing topics that could easily be solved by taking a read through the bible? No, women do not like over-emotional doormats. No you will not woo a woman into loving you by listening to her feelings. "Nice guys" don't always finish last as long as they act on their sexual appetites and don't turn into a complete pedestal chasing stooge. This is elementary stuff dude. You have 375 posts and you're still oblivious to fundamentals.

 

[AKA FLEX]

Pratice to talk to women everywhere you go

grocery, cashier, coffee house..etc

engage in any conversation

Like Tag Team said: "woop, there it is."

It'll feel awkward at first, but so did riding a bicycle. The key to becoming a master conversationalist is to converse every chance you get. Practice makes perfect. Chicks, dudes, old people, young people, fat, skinny, ugly, hot - talk to them all, all the time.

 

[K2000kidd]

get them off the pedastal man
Go into an interaction as if
You're the one THEY are trying to impress
not the other way around

 

[Super Hero]

Quick story...

I remember the time a wise old "ladies man" taught me this lesson.

He said:

Relaxation is actually pretty easy in groups... because your muscles have a rather binary switch... they're either tensed (to some degree) or they're relaxed.

The question is: which muscles should you relax, and which not? I think you'll be able to figure this out for yourself. (Obviously, you want to keep your legs and spine held up straight) For some reason, I find it really beneficial to relax my shoulders and face in set.

But I find there's a deeper way to look at this topic, and this comes directly from being in-field for 100s (maybe 1000s) of hours every year.

Relaxation is not the same as comfort.

Naturals are COMFORTABLE with girls... but not always relaxed.

Being comfortable in set, to me, means three things:

1. Slowing down/shutting off ALL internal rep systems (the pictures and movies and sounds in your mind)

2. Having a good feeling spinning through your body when you're talking to women and

3. Having an OUTWARD focus, on the girl in front of you. (All while your muscles are relaxed and you're feeling good)

The point you begin to take control of your feelings (which I can tell you're looking to learn), is the point something inside clicks and you know your bed will be warm for the rest of your life.