Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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I need som guidance

kipper034

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I see your point sandhawk and Kingsam. And I thought about it, reading other threads, and you guys were right. I was definately over analyzing everything, which is a first step to failure, instead of going with the flow and taking it for what it is. I definately needed some of your "harsh" comments.

So thanks for a reality check and I am just going to sit back and what happens.
 
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"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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SandHawk

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I think you misunderstood the concept behind these forums. We're not your regular dating advice, we're solely here to learn people to be successful with women in general, not how to hit on that specific girl you oh so gloriously placed on a pedestal and god knows how much want to make yours and marry her and spread your pathetic genes with.

The goal behind these forums is to get laid loads and learn to be be a Don Juan, a person whom all women adore, not just one.

No, you're not spoiling her, you're just doing what every other guy around you does: Kiss her ass in the hope she eventually loves you. And you cannot stop doing that all the sudden, now would you? So, depending on what you want: this particular girl or girls in general, we cannot help or we can help you.
 

kipper034

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Hey sandhawk, you didn't have to sound so harsh... You are from Amsterdam? Great, that's one of my favorites cities in Europe as I studied in Nederland for 6 months.

I do see your point. The reason why I posted is that because I do have tendency to go both extremes, to jerk and nice guy. I had two potential relationship destroyed because of that and now I am just trying to find the right balance for betterment. I want to avoid the trap of falling into same hole; I am hoping I am not spoiling her too much. Buying flowers on those days, well, it a norm here. I see others posted their problems as well and those ones who need advice. Similar to others all I am asking is for advice/guidance perhaps not just with her but for the future.
 

SandHawk

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Then read the DJ bible, which can be found here: http://www.jbspencer.com/djb/

Don't ask advice for this girl in particular, but ask on how to improve yourself. Not to us, but also to yourself. And instead of being a weakling that bends to her(or any girl in general) demands, lay down your own rules and stick to them.
 

kingsam

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sandhawk was NOT being harsh......he was being truthful and honest- which to some people (like you?) may hurt
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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