I just want sex and it affects how I feel about my interactions with women.

[thoughts]

Hi, long time lurker but first time poster.

I was hoping to get some insight and maybe some shared experiences from individuals who've had similar thoughts or issues.

When I meet up with women that I've approached or met online and then met them for the date/whatever, I find that the sexual tension is solid(probably something to do with my looks) but my desire for only sex affects the connection and interaction I have with them in some sort of way. I'm not sure how best to explain it but I guess the best I can say is that conversation, to me, doesn't feel natural and doesn't flow well between topics nor do I find that I'm connecting on some level with them because all I want is sex. When we end up doing it finally I feel like my needs were satiated but that it didn't feel genuine... Honestly these are mostly shower thoughts but I've begun to pick up on it consciously...

I think more discussion will help me to better explain?

Regards,

 

[RangerMIke]

Your problem is that you don't have any depth. My guess is that your life centers around getting women. If you don't have any other interests except nailing chicks you will be a boring @ss man.

You do not talk about things that are interesting to you because all you care about is having sex. I know people like you, truth is that there is likely a VERY interesting person in their someplace, you just have to let that person out. Talk about things that are interestign to you... whatever it is, and conversation just flows. Or just get her to talk about what she is interested in, and listen to what she is saying.... pay attention, and try to engage her...you'll do fine.

Having said that, you are doing one thing right... you are making it VERY clear to women that you want sex... that is VERY important. Too many guys tap dance around their masculinity.... and they never get anywhere with women.

 

[thoughts]

Don't things with women tend to die off if you don't make sexual advances though? I guess the irony is I'm also not interested in being platonic friends with them, I wish experiences or bonds to be deeper with the women whom I game successfully. I suppose if I were being honest I would say that I project what I think women want to experience with guys but don't tend to get which is the 'game' and the kino leading to tension and the final close. So it makes everything revolve around sex with them to some degree.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Hi, long time lurker but first time poster.

I was hoping to get some insight and maybe some shared experiences from individuals who've had similar thoughts or issues.

When I meet up with women that I've approached or met online and then met them for the date/whatever, I find that the sexual tension is solid(probably something to do with my looks) but my desire for only sex affects the connection and interaction I have with them in some sort of way. I'm not sure how best to explain it but I guess the best I can say is that conversation, to me, doesn't feel natural and doesn't flow well between topics nor do I find that I'm connecting on some level with them because all I want is sex. When we end up doing it finally I feel like my needs were satiated but that it didn't feel genuine... Honestly these are mostly shower thoughts but I've begun to pick up on it consciously...

I think more discussion will help me to better explain?

Regards,

If all you want is raw sex take a female friend to a swingers club. Easiest quickest and likely cheapest way.

 

[Von]

Hi, long time lurker but first time poster.

I was hoping to get some insight and maybe some shared experiences from individuals who've had similar thoughts or issues.

When I meet up with women that I've approached or met online and then met them for the date/whatever, I find that the sexual tension is solid(probably something to do with my looks) but my desire for only sex affects the connection and interaction I have with them in some sort of way. I'm not sure how best to explain it but I guess the best I can say is that conversation, to me, doesn't feel natural and doesn't flow well between topics nor do I find that I'm connecting on some level with them because all I want is sex. When we end up doing it finally I feel like my needs were satiated but that it didn't feel genuine... Honestly these are mostly shower thoughts but I've begun to pick up on it consciously...

I think more discussion will help me to better explain?

Regards,

I am like that too, i got these intimacy issues and I talk to women only for a clear goal

If i want the sex, it will happens. Than I lose interest. Some of the girls becomes friends.

The thing is like RangerMike said above, you have to diversify around you, your interactions and activities.

If you are only obsessed to have sex with women, do activites that woman are there: Yoga, Lectures, Dancingè

Validate yourself by improving yourself, learn to ask questions about passions or activites that will develop conversation and go on stuff you know or like.

What you need is to do activities that bring social interactions, it will increase your knowledge, value and bag of discussion by creating common interest.

Also, learn to accept what you are.... and make it clear to her

 

[thoughts]

I think you guys are right...I need to expand my interests and hobbies a bit. That's one area where I feel I've always lacked a bit.

 

[CMNILS87]

I think you guys are right...I need to expand my interests and hobbies a bit. That's one area where I feel I've always lacked a bit.

Like everyone said, you're going through the motions of the date. Step into her shoes and think for a second. Are you coming off as super aloof and standoffish? Do you engage questions after she says something? Do you make a joke from something funny she did. You just need to be open to listening to everything she says. She'll tell you everything you need to know as long as your head isn't in the clouds.

 

[marmel75]

Hi, long time lurker but first time poster.

I was hoping to get some insight and maybe some shared experiences from individuals who've had similar thoughts or issues.

When I meet up with women that I've approached or met online and then met them for the date/whatever, I find that the sexual tension is solid(probably something to do with my looks) but my desire for only sex affects the connection and interaction I have with them in some sort of way. I'm not sure how best to explain it but I guess the best I can say is that conversation, to me, doesn't feel natural and doesn't flow well between topics nor do I find that I'm connecting on some level with them because all I want is sex. When we end up doing it finally I feel like my needs were satiated but that it didn't feel genuine... Honestly these are mostly shower thoughts but I've begun to pick up on it consciously...

I think more discussion will help me to better explain?

Regards,

I used to do the same thing, so I can tell you where you are going wrong. They sense you aren't interested in them or what they are talking about, so they shut down knowing what you are after.

You would do better to be upfront about it versus trying to pretend you aren't. Will some chicks be off put by it? Yes. Will others like the fact you are upfront and honest? Yes...and those are the ones you will get laid by.