"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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I just realized I'm super competitive

Desert Fox

Master Don Juan
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Came as a surprise to me...I usually underachieve until the LAST MOMENT and then I'm always really clutch and pull it off.

Makes me wonder how I could accomplish so much more if I just was clutch...ALL THE TIME. You know what I mean?

But I've been looking for a trigger for a long time and I think I found it: competition!

Or better yet...pressure. I guess I am one of those people that when put under pressure just owns the competition.

So my question for you guys is how should I trigger my competitive trigger? I want to keep my self-esteem at a reasonable level so self-deprecation can only go so far to keep me motivated. Maybe I should find a few idols or models to look up to? :)
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Da Realist

Master Don Juan
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"I just realized I'm super competitive"

No you're not! I am!

Ok, but for real, you have a balance issue. At first you don't care or try, and then you decide to move on something at the last minute. The trick is to forget about winning/losing or passing/failing and just be determined to see what you're doing through to the end. Think about a farmer: he throws seeds out knowing some will grow and others won't for whatever reason. He gets up every morning and tends to his crops for the whole growing season till he harvests whatever he has at the end. It's a slow process, but at the end he gets something in return.
 

SeanyB

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Hahaha I thought that was just me lol I'm like that in college - not pay too much attention then get As and Bs in the big tests :)
 

Desert Fox

Master Don Juan
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Da Realist said:
"I just realized I'm super competitive"

No you're not! I am!

Ok, but for real, you have a balance issue. At first you don't care or try, and then you decide to move on something at the last minute. The trick is to forget about winning/losing or passing/failing and just be determined to see what you're doing through to the end. Think about a farmer: he throws seeds out knowing some will grow and others won't for whatever reason. He gets up every morning and tends to his crops for the whole growing season till he harvests whatever he has at the end. It's a slow process, but at the end he gets something in return.
Solid stuff bro. I will try to adopt this mindset.

The context is school (college), work, relationships, etc. EVERYTHING
 

strong like bull

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what you need to be doing is developing that competitive nature. a few recommendations do develop your abilities:

sports, for competitive teamplay. also physical exercise. pickup basketball games at a local gym/park, would be good.

internally focused physical activities, like hiking/mountain climbing, weight-lifting, etc.

developing your career/business. lets face it, the most driven businessman is usually the most successful. it just pays well to be focused.


being driven is one of the single most important traits a man could have. its ok to be competitive against others, but even greater to be competitive against yourself.

-SLB
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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