Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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I have no wheels, and I must date!

Fa Zhou

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Greets, all! Great site and great forum!

I have a bit of a situation. I do not own a car. I live within an easy walk of work and store, and use public transportation like the bus or a ride from a friend/family member when the bus isn't convenient.

Am I dead in the water, or can I somehow turn this to my advantage?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Hamno

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Just meet up at places....much preferred for a first date anyway

What girl who had this strange guy ask for her number on the street is actually going to want him to know where she lives?

Hamno
 

nectarine

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It's a handicap, but if you're in easy public transport range of town you can overcome it. Still, fix it as soon as possible anyway. A man needs a ride.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Francisco d'Anconia

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Originally posted by Fa Zhou
Bellevue, Washington.
Ever hear of a town called Manhattan? Living proof that having an active dating live without owning a car is possible.
 

DumpaLumpagus

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Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
Ever hear of a town called Manhattan? Living proof that having an active dating live without owning a car is possible.
True, but many places within the U.S. are just so suburban, with giant housing plots that stretch for miles in every direction, with the occasional mini-mall. For lack of a better word, boring. That's why I asked. Manhattan or another big city seems like a great idea because there's culture and it's within walking distance. I don't know about Bellevue, but DJing without a car if you live in the 'burbs just doesn't live up to it's potential.
 

chancer

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I don't have a car anymore... I use to go on dates all of the time. But now i'm a broke college student. I rarely date, but I talk to more girls now. I pretty much i just ride around with friends. If i find a bunch of girls that are sexy, i'll just hit up my friends and set some **** up. For 1v1's i tell them to come by my pad and pick me up. :) It's very possible. just run with it

Oh and btw... I live in LA
 

chancer

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Also, i use to live with a female roommate, who was crazy for this guy who didn't have a car. She'd drive 30 mins away, pick him up, and bring him back to the pad, and you know the rest... (HB9)

Dating can be overrated... you don't always have to spend money. Just go hang out and have fun. If she's interested, she'll come back.

So grab your balls, get some numbers or go do something when you meet them. And work with what you have.
 

NYtomb

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Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
Ever hear of a town called Manhattan? Living proof that having an active dating live without owning a car is possible.
I used to live in the city. A car is more of a liabilty than an asset there. Metro card and knowing what train take is all you need. Unfortunately not all cities have such an effective mass transit system in place. I would list Manhattan as a special case along with a few other large metro cities with competent mass transit systems in place.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Fa Zhou

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First up, car situation is getting fixed.

Next, Bellevue is rather suburbia. Plus there are places outside of Bellevue I'd like to sarge at too.

The real kicker is going out for drinks and getting a ride home with my sister :mad: :rolleyes: instead of the gal I wanted to. Having my own ride in that particular circumstance (she was riding with a friend too) would have been much better.
 

jhs

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meet girls who use the same form of transportation you do... girls on the bus etc.

for a while all i had was a motorcycle and i thought it was hindering my ability... however girls don't really seem to care at all about picking you up for a date. of course if they dont like you its a different story. i find if i meet my date somewhere and we head off on an adventure of some sort we usually dont follow eachother in our separate cars. its no big deal really. besides in 5 years, not having a car will be a desirable feature in men. women will assume men who dont have to buy gas are millionaires.
 

LittleElf

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If I were you I would lie. Make up a story about how you have some rare disease and the doctors don't know what is going to happen to you in the near future. Discuss what it is like to have a really terrible seizure (like there is a good seizure :p) What do you studs think about pulling the old pity trick?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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NYtomb

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Originally posted by LittleElf
If I were you I would lie. Make up a story about how you have some rare disease and the doctors don't know what is going to happen to you in the near future. Discuss what it is like to have a really terrible seizure (like there is a good seizure :p) What do you studs think about pulling the old pity trick?
Link it into the car issue somehow. If i have a seizure while driving I could lose control and kill some poor family on their way to church. This is why I dont own a car.:D
 
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