"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

I hate this website, was happier before I found it

Kal0051

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 24, 2009
Messages
964
Reaction score
7
I'm leaving this fvcking website for good. I don't see the point of it. No matter what I do I won't be good with women, not even good enough to get one woman. It's always been that way and it'll always be that way.

And I was happy before I came here, before people here convinced me that it's possible for me to get women. The fact that I still can't after being convinced is making me very unhappy so I'd prefer to just go back to accepting that it's not gonna happen.

So peace everyone :rockon:
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

Cure

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 7, 2009
Messages
304
Reaction score
5
Location
London
you're right, you will never get any women, none at all.

But its not because you can't get women, its because you dont want it enough, you are unwilling to try. you've made over 700 posts before coming to the conclusion you've come to.

In that time, have you actually gone out and applied anything you've learned? made any changes to your life that could help improve your chances?

I doubt it, but if Im wrong and you have been applying it, you just need to stop b!tching and try harder.

Cure
 

Kal0051

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 24, 2009
Messages
964
Reaction score
7
Cure said:
you're right, you will never get any women, none at all.

But its not because you can't get women, its because you dont want it enough, you are unwilling to try. you've made over 700 posts before coming to the conclusion you've come to.

In that time, have you actually gone out and applied anything you've learned? made any changes to your life that could help improve your chances?

I doubt it, but if Im wrong and you have been applying it, you just need to stop b!tching and try harder.

Cure
Yes I have been trying to apply it. I don't just sit at home and not talk to women. But it hasn't worked at all. All I get are rejection after rejection after rejection. Been rejected more since I've been on this site than all the other 24 years of my life (mainly because I made it a point of talking to and asking out women).

And don't tell me to stop *****ing. How bout you try being ignored by EVERY woman you meet. That despite your best efforts you don't get any results, no dates, not even a LJBF (instead they pretend I don't exist). That chips away slowly at your self-confidence and ego, and mine's pretty much done. If I have some results I wouldn't care as much but now I'm pissed.
 

omega05

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 18, 2009
Messages
654
Reaction score
10
Location
chicago
Kal0051 said:
Yes I have been trying to apply it. I don't just sit at home and not talk to women. But it hasn't worked at all. All I get are rejection after rejection after rejection. Been rejected more since I've been on this site than all the other 24 years of my life (mainly because I made it a point of talking to and asking out women).

And don't tell me to stop *****ing. How bout you try being ignored by EVERY woman you meet. That despite your best efforts you don't get any results, no dates, not even a LJBF (instead they pretend I don't exist). That chips away slowly at your self-confidence and ego, and mine's pretty much done. If I have some results I wouldn't care as much but now I'm pissed.
you cant really count yourself out unless you've been rejected by every women in your city or state
 

amoka

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 18, 2006
Messages
1,931
Reaction score
62
Good for you

Kal0051 said:
I'm leaving this fvcking website for good. I don't see the point of it. No matter what I do I won't be good with women, not even good enough to get one woman. It's always been that way and it'll always be that way.

And I was happy before I came here, before people here convinced me that it's possible for me to get women. The fact that I still can't after being convinced is making me very unhappy so I'd prefer to just go back to accepting that it's not gonna happen.

So peace everyone :rockon:
Good for you. Good luck.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

Desdinova

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 15, 2004
Messages
11,681
Reaction score
4,879
You have a couple of problems:

1) You're placing too much importance on women. If you were really able to be happy WITHOUT the need for a woman, you wouldn't be ranting about rejection.

2) You're taking rejection too personally. Instead of using rejection to improve the way you're interacting with women, you've decided to take it at face value and let it hurt your precious feelings.

You can either give up or keep working on yourself. If you give up, you will just continue being unsuccessful with women. But if you keep working at it and try different things to see what DOES work, then at least you have a chance at being successful.
 

ENIGMA16

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 21, 2009
Messages
764
Reaction score
21
You haven't understood anything here if this is your position; the entire point of being a DJ is becoming independent, learning not to make women the priority in your life and to not judge yourself based on your interactions with women. This site is meant to help people move towards that goal by giving them tools and insight on their situation.

If you are really that down about rejection then you simply haven't got it. The message that you're supposed to be getting out of rejection is that you got rejected and nothing terrible happened; that you went up to a girl and she rejected you and that you're still the same person you were before you went up to her, except now you have the ability to at least try. Instead, you're going in the opposite direction and letting your interactions with women be of paramount importance and are using every interaction you have with women as an occasion to judge yourself as a person and as a man.

And also, there are reasons that you get rejected. Sure, sometimes it's just because a girl is not going to be into you, regardless of how good your game is. But any guy can get at least some girls that won't reject them (without lowering their standards). So instead of using these moments to judge yourself as a person, you should be analyzing these situations and using them as self-criticism and reflection on where you went wrong and what you can do next time. In this sense every interaction you have with women is a success, because they all help you learn.

Your goals are messed up. Your goal is to get a girl, or **** a girl, and when you fail at this you feel like you're failing at your goals. Your goal should be improving yourself, not getting girls.
 

Kal0051

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 24, 2009
Messages
964
Reaction score
7
JLay87 said:
You haven't understood anything here if this is your position; the entire point of being a DJ is becoming independent, learning not to make women the priority in your life and to not judge yourself based on your interactions with women. This site is meant to help people move towards that goal by giving them tools and insight on their situation.

If you are really that down about rejection then you simply haven't got it. The message that you're supposed to be getting out of rejection is that you got rejected and nothing terrible happened; that you went up to a girl and she rejected you and that you're still the same person you were before you went up to her, except now you have the ability to at least try. Instead, you're going in the opposite direction and letting your interactions with women be of paramount importance and are using every interaction you have with women as an occasion to judge yourself as a person and as a man.

And also, there are reasons that you get rejected. Sure, sometimes it's just because a girl is not going to be into you, regardless of how good your game is. But any guy can get at least some girls that won't reject them (without lowering their standards). So instead of using these moments to judge yourself as a person, you should be analyzing these situations and using them as self-criticism and reflection on where you went wrong and what you can do next time. In this sense every interaction you have with women is a success, because they all help you learn.

Your goals are messed up. Your goal is to get a girl, or **** a girl, and when you fail at this you feel like you're failing at your goals. Your goal should be improving yourself, not getting girls.
I am improving myself, I have been doing that for years. And in a year or so I'll be done with my short term goal, which is to finish my second degree and start my career. I'm not doing that to get women, I'm doing it for myself.

But at the same time I've never been good with women. Sure, I've slept with a couple of girls but that was just because they were drunk. The same girls rejected me once they sobered up. So yes, I am making getting a girl a goal, I won't achieve it otherwise.

And as for your comment about any guy can get some girls, well I can't. So there goes that theory of yours. I don't judge myself because I'm getting rejected, it just pisses me off that no girl likes me. I still think I'm a good guy and I like my life and myself. But I'm tired of being made fun of because I can't get a date or always being the third wheel. That's why I joined this site. I know what I want out of life and how to get there so I'm not here for self improvement. The part of my life I needed help with is my inability to be successful with girls.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

ENIGMA16

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 21, 2009
Messages
764
Reaction score
21
And as for your comment about any guy can get some girls, well I can't. So there goes that theory of yours.
Yes you can. It's not about who you are, it's about what you're doing. You need to work on your game. There's nothing inherent within you that makes it so you can't get women. That's what you believe and that is completely wrong.
 

Kal0051

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 24, 2009
Messages
964
Reaction score
7
JLay87 said:
Yes you can. It's not about who you are, it's about what you're doing. You need to work on your game. There's nothing inherent within you that makes it so you can't get women. That's what you believe and that is completely wrong.
so why are women so turned off by me and don't even want to be friends with me? It's not like I'm being LJBFed, these girls are pretending I don't exist.

Edit: I can't post anymore. But I've given plenty of information about my problems with women over the last year (and I posted one recently, look it up). So far none of the advice has worked. The closest I've gotten is coffee with one girl then she cut off all contact, ignoring my calls, texts, and she even blocked me on facebook. I've given enough info here, and while there are a couple people that tried to help (even though their advice didn't work), most of the other people on here just said "you have no game" with no follow up advice (not helpful). So if you have advice I haven't tried already then maybe I'll give it a try but I'm not trying the same old things expecting different results.
 

ENIGMA16

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 21, 2009
Messages
764
Reaction score
21
so why are women so turned off by me and don't even want to be friends with me? It's not like I'm being LJBFed, these girls are pretending I don't exist.
Well it's obviously something you're doing or a vibe that you're giving off. Other than that we can't really help without more information.
 

Cherokee

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 12, 2009
Messages
157
Reaction score
9
Desdinova said it right. I'm not gonna point fingers, cos so many people are quick to say "this is your problem", when really its a lot simpler. All this website has done, is open your eyes to the truth, unfortunately that truth has messed up your vision of reality. When someone's vision of their own reality is disturbed, it creates a profound resonating effect in your mind. What is true? what is false? but instead of discovering the new reality you've chosen to return back to the dark! where is the adventure in that?.

You can get women, anyone can. The quality of the women you wish to achieve depends highly on your effort and perseverance. Quitters never win, it's cliché, but christ its true. So the choice is yours my friend, you can go back to the dark, sit in your room and twiddle your thumbs and wonder WTF happened? Or you can take it on the chin, not give a damn about how those around you are progressing and take it in your stride.

It really does depend on how much you want it. Period.
 

BigWillyStyle

Banned
Joined
May 22, 2004
Messages
300
Reaction score
1
Age
43
Location
In Uranus
so why are women so turned off by me and don't even want to be friends with me? It's not like I'm being LJBFed, these girls are pretending I don't exist.
Perhaps you lack social skills? Do you have guy friends?

The closest I've gotten is coffee with one girl then she cut off all contact, ignoring my calls, texts, and she even blocked me on facebook.
Perhaps you came off as 'creepy' on the coffee date. I doubt mere sexual disinterest in you would make her do all that. (Again, a lack of social skills could have caused you to come off this way [i.e., creepy].)
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

Read more...

Warrior74

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 25, 2008
Messages
5,106
Reaction score
230
It sounds like you have a problem with your social skills, if you can get a girl on a coffee date, a chic you like, you must look decent enough for her. So the problem is how you acted, how you treated her. Do you recall what you said? And how you said it? What did you talk about? How did the convo go?

You need to be posting field reports and asking people you respect on here for help.
 

Blood Angel

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 10, 2009
Messages
49
Reaction score
1
Location
Ontario
Warrior74 said:
It sounds like you have a problem with your social skills, if you can get a girl on a coffee date, a chic you like, you must look decent enough for her. So the problem is how you acted, how you treated her. Do you recall what you said? And how you said it? What did you talk about? How did the convo go?

You need to be posting field reports and asking people you respect on here for help.
^ This.

I personally struggle a lot with the same stuff that the OP is describing and this is how I'm going about fixing it. Take Warrior's advice. Keep at it and be sure to post frequent Field Reports.
 

thecurtainfalls

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 20, 2006
Messages
285
Reaction score
11
Location
Northern Cali
You have a very defeatist attitude and obviously low self esteem.

I can guarantee this is filtering into your interactions with women. It's very unattractive. As much as it might feel good to go around feeling sorry for yourself like this, it's absolutely pathetic and I'm not surprised that this mindset isn't enabling you to get any girls.

As a couple others said, you're probably not hideous - you got a couple coffee dates and whatnot. That's the good news. Your game is fixable. The bad news is that your personality is probably pretty bad to have a girl BLOCK you on Facebook after a coffee date.

My first reaction is to try and list some of the outer game stuff that you probably did wrong at this coffee date, but it's pointless because your inner game is shattered right now and you're caught in a cycle of feeling sorry for yourself.

When you're ready to man up and continue the fight, ask some of us for help with an open mind, a steel resolve, and none of this self-pity BS.
 

Tyson420

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 3, 2009
Messages
328
Reaction score
7
Location
BC Vancouver
She BLOCKED you?

Can you tell us what you said the coffee date? Must have been some pretty ****ed up ****.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

Read more...

Top