Hi guys,
Okay I'm in a bit of a dilemma. I've been seeing this girl for the last 6 months, and I'm starting to feel it's at the point where I either need to really commit, or just pull the eject cable. What's making the decision difficult for me is because the main red flag that is holding me back isn't exactly her fault:
Her family is nuts and I depise them. Literally crazy. Her dad is an alocholic, her mum is a bipolar who won't take pills. Sister (22) has anger issues and is now knocked up by some guy she's been seeing for all of 2 months and they are going to carry to term. The family has been running an equine business for the last 6 years, of which my gf was involved for the first 4. Things got ugly (given that the parents are nuts) and she walked away from the business. Stayed away for a year or so, parents begged her to come back to keep the business afloat, so she did. Of course things were fine for a couple months, then went to **** again. So the gf recently left again, took the clients, and now runs it as her own business with the parents not involved. But through the whole time I've known her, the parents have gone out of their way to make her life miserable; they intentionally do their best to hurt her, day in and day out. And instead of the gf saying "piss off" and changing her phone number, she still keeps in touch and contacts them.
Ironically, coming from such a crazy situation, she herself seems pretty well adjusted. Polite, hard working, very personable with clients, that sort of thing. My issue is that I hate the parents, and I don't think it's undeserved: I'm not the kind of person who just puts the blinders on when someone I care about is being hurt, and that's what is happening in this situation. I would like to see her just walk away from the whole thing and not look back, but it's family after all, and it's easier said than done.
The way I see it is if things get serious, maybe 2-3 yrs down the road you're talking marriage and kids (for the sake of argument). Long story short, grandparents like to see their grandkids, and kids like to have their parents at weddings. These people are not people I would ever want at a wedding or family Christmas, and I sure as hell wouldn't want them around my kids. And while it's easy for me to say that, I'm guessing the gf will feel differently as time passes? And if that's the case, that puts me in an even trickier spot of having the gf annoyed at her parents now, but as time passes she forgives them. Then suddenly I'm the selfish ******* in the situation.
Anyway, I'm thinking it's time I split with this girl, but when the problem I'm having isn't directly her fault, I wondered if maybe that was an unfair way to look at it. Anyone have any experience with where a person hates and cuts off the in-laws and the relationship still worked?
Okay I'm in a bit of a dilemma. I've been seeing this girl for the last 6 months, and I'm starting to feel it's at the point where I either need to really commit, or just pull the eject cable. What's making the decision difficult for me is because the main red flag that is holding me back isn't exactly her fault:
Her family is nuts and I depise them. Literally crazy. Her dad is an alocholic, her mum is a bipolar who won't take pills. Sister (22) has anger issues and is now knocked up by some guy she's been seeing for all of 2 months and they are going to carry to term. The family has been running an equine business for the last 6 years, of which my gf was involved for the first 4. Things got ugly (given that the parents are nuts) and she walked away from the business. Stayed away for a year or so, parents begged her to come back to keep the business afloat, so she did. Of course things were fine for a couple months, then went to **** again. So the gf recently left again, took the clients, and now runs it as her own business with the parents not involved. But through the whole time I've known her, the parents have gone out of their way to make her life miserable; they intentionally do their best to hurt her, day in and day out. And instead of the gf saying "piss off" and changing her phone number, she still keeps in touch and contacts them.
Ironically, coming from such a crazy situation, she herself seems pretty well adjusted. Polite, hard working, very personable with clients, that sort of thing. My issue is that I hate the parents, and I don't think it's undeserved: I'm not the kind of person who just puts the blinders on when someone I care about is being hurt, and that's what is happening in this situation. I would like to see her just walk away from the whole thing and not look back, but it's family after all, and it's easier said than done.
The way I see it is if things get serious, maybe 2-3 yrs down the road you're talking marriage and kids (for the sake of argument). Long story short, grandparents like to see their grandkids, and kids like to have their parents at weddings. These people are not people I would ever want at a wedding or family Christmas, and I sure as hell wouldn't want them around my kids. And while it's easy for me to say that, I'm guessing the gf will feel differently as time passes? And if that's the case, that puts me in an even trickier spot of having the gf annoyed at her parents now, but as time passes she forgives them. Then suddenly I'm the selfish ******* in the situation.
Anyway, I'm thinking it's time I split with this girl, but when the problem I'm having isn't directly her fault, I wondered if maybe that was an unfair way to look at it. Anyone have any experience with where a person hates and cuts off the in-laws and the relationship still worked?