This chick is crazy. She has been flaking and showing low interest for three weeks now. Then, she calls me on Sat crying and apologizing for her behavior and telling me how she cares and everything. blah blah blah. So she calls me again today and I just said look "I don't want to waste my time because it seems like you are not interested. You are also holding some things against me (which she was)..........Look, I'll leave the ball in your court, if you want to hang out, let me know. I don't expect anything (she was telling me oh I don't know what I want, I'm confused, etc.) I like your company and I like you but I don't expect anything." I just had enough. I'm too old and too tired to chase after a girl who is telling me she is confused and doesn't know what she wants. I just want to have sex with her. So do you think I did the right thing? Usually, I would be more aggressive, but I realize at this age that her attraction to me goes lower when I chase for some reason. What do you think? I'm not contacting ever again. If she wants to see me, she can call. I've known her for a while now and we already had sex and she has been distant because she either thinks I want relationship, or her exboyfriend is back. I just don't want to play games anymore. I'm tired. WHAT WOULD YOU DO?
"The Kiss of Death Mistake"
You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?
Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.
One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.
Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I had enough, and said this to a girl........
- Thread starter trent81
- Start date
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
iqqi
Master Don Juan
This one is easy.
No matter what she is calling to talk about... cut her short and say "Look, don't call me until you are on your way over. Bye."
No matter what she is calling to talk about... cut her short and say "Look, don't call me until you are on your way over. Bye."
What would I do?
"She has been flaking and showing low interest for three weeks now"
I wouldn't have let it continue for three weeks.
"I just said look "I don't want to waste my time because it seems like you are not interested..."
And she just tells you she's "confused", apologizes, cries, blah blah, my point being there's NO point in telling a chick what it seems like she is or isn't. So what would I do? I'd just stop talking to her and find women who want to go out with me. It's that frickin' simple.
Understand that when women use the word "confused", don't believe for a second that their brains are actually confused. Women have IQs, you know. They're not stupid. They play as if they're stupid. They know EXACTLY what they're doing, and the "I'm confused" bit is a ploy to keep you in their orbit and in the dark. There's probably another guy involved. Oh! The ex bf is back? Excuse me, but he never left. Chances are she's playing him too with the same bit.
>> Look, I'll leave the ball in your court>>
I wouldn't do that either.
"She has been flaking and showing low interest for three weeks now"
I wouldn't have let it continue for three weeks.
"I just said look "I don't want to waste my time because it seems like you are not interested..."
And she just tells you she's "confused", apologizes, cries, blah blah, my point being there's NO point in telling a chick what it seems like she is or isn't. So what would I do? I'd just stop talking to her and find women who want to go out with me. It's that frickin' simple.
Understand that when women use the word "confused", don't believe for a second that their brains are actually confused. Women have IQs, you know. They're not stupid. They play as if they're stupid. They know EXACTLY what they're doing, and the "I'm confused" bit is a ploy to keep you in their orbit and in the dark. There's probably another guy involved. Oh! The ex bf is back? Excuse me, but he never left. Chances are she's playing him too with the same bit.
>> Look, I'll leave the ball in your court>>
I wouldn't do that either.
This is a non issue. If you had a life and important things to attend to you wouldnt even be wasting your time with these conversations let alone making a thread about it.
Btw even if she wanted to see you again, would you? The way you answer this question says alot about you.
Btw even if she wanted to see you again, would you? The way you answer this question says alot about you.
Listen to her actions - NOT HER WORDS!trent81 said:
Regarding what you said - it is now 100% irrelevant because it is in the past. You can't undo it. You'll only dig a deeper hole trying to understand it or change it. Plus what you said wasn't all the bad.
You guys were intimate. Something about it doesn't sit right with her. Go ahead, speculate all you want, but the reason is irrelevant, it's the corresponding actions (or lack of "actions") that matter. Now she wants you to be her girlfriend while she figures out whether to accept your frame or go back to the other guy (emotionally, she thinks this will be easiest for her). Heck, call it a great sh!t test. But deep down she hopes you'll be a MAN and respond with indifference (even if she never sees you again). It may make things more complicated for her but she'll understand and respect you for it (in the end). If you keep talking and trying to solve her problems I can assure you that you will not be with her long. This is a role for her healthy female GF's.
Then stop playing them. You're the man. MOVE FORWARD with your life. If she wants, she can catch up. When you're moving forward, they only frame is your frame.trent81 said:
If Rollo doesn't insert links regarding Plate Theory and women witholding intimacy for frame control then use the search link
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.