"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

I found out why my GF is so emotionally stable...

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

Read more...

Scars

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How far a long into the relationship are you?

A girl that shares this gem with me pretty early on I see as a gigantic red flag. And as we all know, they may appear "stable" at the beginning of things, then suddenly flip the psycho switch.

Just looking out for you brother.

But yes, I agree. Doctors need to come out with an almighty pill that makes woman less crazy. I would even help fund that sh!t.

-Scars
 

SecondHalf

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Ran from one of those, takes some SSRI and Lithium.
Wasn't ready to date nutty after just surviving a 14 year marriage with a cluster B.

Turned her into a FB.
Now I service her between her two month victims.
It works.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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DJ Logic

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Caveat: Over time a lot of these bipolar medications adversely affect the metabolism and these girls will suddenly pack on some serious weight. But if you are cool with having a drug-dependent borderline-psycho fatass as your dime piece then who am I to argue?

FWIW I've dated plenty of women who did not need any medication to be a decent human being.
 

Rollo Tomassi

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Danger! Danger Will Robinson!!
 

5string

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Desdinova said:
She told me she was diagnosed Bi-polar, but she faithfully takes her pills every single day. Every fvcking woman should be on that 5hit.
Be careful my friend. You know the drill. This is serious stuff.

You would not have posted this if it did not concern you. But, you should be concerned. Let us know if you need to talk.
 

Scaramouche

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Dear Des,
Oh Mate!,take care....In a long previous post,I mentioned in passing that when I take a Lady out for a while I take a look at what she has medication-wise in her Bathroom vanity unit,took a bit of flack from the Girls' blouse brigade....six years ago Red warning Bells started ringing with a Lady I had carted out for about a month,took a Little Bo-Peep in her Bathroom,couldn't make out what she was taking but wrote the names down....Yup a BPD,and didn't she run true to form....forewarned is forearmed.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

cordoncordon

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I'm confused. In another thread you wrote this yesterday:

Desdinova

Quote:


I've found mine, and we're getting divorced. The worst part about the whole thing is I found mine AFTER I joined this forum and had been posting regularly.

Being with the wrong woman TWICE is enough for me.


And now you are saying you are with a bipolar woman WHILE you are getting divorced for the second time to another woman? Some of you guys just love the drama don't you? I don't get it.
 

Colossus

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Bipolar I and II are amazingly common diagnoses. The lifelong prevalence of bipolar disorder in the United States is around 1% to 1.6%. BPI occurs equally in both sexes; however, rapid-cycling bipolar disorder (4 or more episodes a year) is more common in women than in men. The incidence of BPII is higher in females than in males.

Epidemiology aside, I'm not convinced all the diagnoses are made on a sound clinical basis. Basically I think behavioral b!tches are sometimes written off as having Bipolar disorders, where in reality they just need an attitude adjustment. Just my opinion though. My catalytic oneitis in college was Bipolar. She was unpredictable to say the least, but there were other factors at play there.

Anyways, this isnt new territory for you, Des. Maybe probe a little deeper and find out if she is the depressive-predominant type or the manic-predominant type....might give you some insight as to what you can expect if she ever gets off meds; for pregnancy, insurance, or some other reason. :nervous:


(Reference: http://emedicine.medscape.com/article/286342-overview)
 

Delly2000

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Man...there are no clean deals.

I think when you guys became serious she should have shared that with you. I think 8 months is long enough...but varies from relationship to relationship. Too soon I do think is inappropriate.

Here at the forum the BPD is like the antithesis of the don juan..next to the "nice guy". Maybe I should say the arch nemisis. In the sense that the Don Juan is 100% game..and the BPD by nature in the long run is un-gameable.

Not sure what you going to do. Especially with the investment (time/emotion) you have made. But you have experience with this. Plus you see all the posts surrounding BPD women.

Touchy situation.
 

pdx1138

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SecondHalf said:
Ran from one of those, takes some SSRI and Lithium.
Wasn't ready to date nutty after just surviving a 14 year marriage with a cluster B.

Turned her into a FB.
Now I service her between her two month victims.
It works.

the s3x is great isn't it :)
 

Rogue

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Espi said:
I'm no expert on bipolar disorder, but a family member of mine was involved in a long-term relationship, and his bi-polar GF, for whatever reason, would stop taking her meds, and her depression would quicken to the point that she wouldn't get out of bed.
I have a friend who had that happen to him. He had no clue she was bipolar until right after they got married. She stopped taking her meds, went batshît, and threatened him at gunpoint.

Desdinova, you're playing with fire.
 
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"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

Sue Madre

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Next thing you may find out is that she has Herpes and never told you about that either.
 

Sue Madre

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cordoncordon said:
I'm confused. In another thread you wrote this yesterday:

Desdinova

Quote:


I've found mine, and we're getting divorced. The worst part about the whole thing is I found mine AFTER I joined this forum and had been posting regularly.

Being with the wrong woman TWICE is enough for me.


And now you are saying you are with a bipolar woman WHILE you are getting divorced for the second time to another woman? Some of you guys just love the drama don't you? I don't get it.

He is obviously talking about his former wife being his perfect match that didn't work out, and then his current girlfriend who he thought was the right one and is turning out to be another whackjob.

Duh , you need to keep up with the Days of Our Sosuave program.
 

Johnnyventana

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BPD is not Bipolar. They are 2 very different things. One is a mental illness (BPD or Borderline Personality Disorder) and the other is a mood disorder (Bipolar). I wanted to clarify as it seemed some people were using them interchangeable. Also, Bipolar you can medicate, BPD you can not. The later sometimes will take prescriptions, but they are hardly effective and there is no BPD pill.
 

Knight's Cross

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Des!
What are you doing? Sure there's no clean deals, but this falls outside the realm. Get out while you aren't too entangled. That's my 2 cents. Every woman that I dated that was...on meds, or should have been on meds....I count my blessings that I didn't either wind up getting an STD, a unwanted pregnency, or worse. I'm sure it isn't easy. You've been dating her for awhile, you feel a connection...etc. Be honest tho....You KNOW that she has MAJOR issues now. This kind of issue won't go away, it won't get better, and it's ALWAYS in the closet ready to come out.....
Sorry to hear about this, but when a woman is honest she's TELLING you in hopes you'll white knight.
Don't do it.
KC
 

Bible_Belt

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An ex of mine has OCD so badly that she said she couldn't leave the house, had to stay home to organize everything and cry that it wasn't perfect. That was before Paxil. Now she is a state's attorney, and doing very well. It's a night and day difference with the Paxil.

Of course it is impossible to make a thread on sosuave about a girl without everyone telling you to dump her, but the one thing you might check is if she can have kids while on her meds, if that is something you want. My ex can't ever have children while on Paxil, and she can't cope without it, so I don't see her ever having kids.

All that matters is that you are happy. Good luck with everything.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

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