I found myself laughing in delight over this

MatureDJ

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I’ve been engaged to my boyfriend for six years. We thought we would get married sooner but between moving to another state and establishing ourselves in our fields, it has taken us several years to be financially stable. Recently, I mentioned to him that I wanted to start planning the wedding and he dropped a bombshell saying that he wants to keep living together but he doesn’t really believe in the formality of a wedding and that the government shouldn’t intervene in our lives, it’s an antiquated sexist custom, it’s a needless expense, etc.
You gave this Chad 6+ of your best years, and all he did was consume them, and spit you out. :rofl:
We’ve had several discussions and he won’t budge. I know his reasoning is practical; for example, he says we could take a trip to France rather than spend money on dinner and a dress I’ll only wear once, but I love the idea of a wedding. My sister says he isn’t serious about me if he’s not willing to make this commitment, and I see her point. She says plenty of other men would give me the wedding instead of dashing my dreams. I’ve invested six years of my life with him and I don’t know if I want to break up with him over this single issue, but I am increasingly snapping at him and fighting. I don’t know what to do. I feel I’ve been tricked and now I’m trapped.
Yes, but you had chosen a Chad thinking that you could seal the deal, and instead he has left you to go back to the tournament, now 6 years older than your competition. Choices ...
 

Hal9000

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I can understand the argument that it's stupid to waste a ton of money on a wedding but we guys all know that's just the hill he's chosen to die on because he doesn't want to marry her period. When guys start talking like chick's about something being an antiquated sexist custom you know they are floundering for any excuse they can latch on to to avoid having to tell her he just doesn't like her enough to get married. It's her fault though for letting his BS excuses drag out for the better part of a decade, and you never want to get married to anyone you have to talk into doing so.
 

Dr.Suave

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D@mn, this guy enjoyed sex with this girl for more than six years and then he´s like "Wedding? Nah, that´s patriarchal, oppresive and sexist etc. I cant marry you because Im a male feminist".

Translation: I dont want to marry you. I have been working on myself all these years and Im pretty sure I can pull someone better.

This guy is a piece of work (in a good way?). She lost the game and deep down she knows it; that´s why she´s been snapping at him and making up fake fights.

Most likely she´s gonna break up with him and ride the carousel until she finds a beta chump provider. She´s gonna have One Night Stands and Same Night Lays with Chads & Tyrones while she makes the beta wait for sex and he´s gonna marry her.
 

The Duke

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I was once in a similar situation. I put off marriage for several years(6yrs of dating, 3yrs of when are you going to marry me, 1yr engagement). Eventually she gave me a schitt or get off the pot date and I gave in. Our marriage lasted about 5yrs.

For me it had nothing to do with me not being into her nor sharing our life together. It had everything to do about feeling controlled by an antiquated, sexist custom so we could spend a bunch of money and have the government meddle in our affairs when it ended. Marriage was not going to change how I functioned in my relationship so I saw no point. It was not going to improve nor guarantee anything therefore they are pointless when you aren't going to have kids.

The second girl that wanted marriage I told her NO. She lasted 2 more years and I finally ended it.

The girl I have now is much younger than me and asked if I would ever consider marriage. I told her HELL NO. She told me "well thats ok, you are amazing enough I wouldn't have to be married". Time will tell if she changes her tune on that or not.

Its no big deal. If thats what they want then they can go find some other chump. I have no problem finding another one. New women can be like fresh air anyways.

But with the two girls that asked for it, they both went on to marry beta males that they despise. How do I know? Because I still hear from them on occasion. They'd both happily come back to me if I wanted it.

So what guy would you rather be? Marriage is meaningless. Its doesn't benefit the male unless she makes more $$$ than you and your'e a mooch.
 

BackInTheGame78

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I was once in a similar situation. I put off marriage for several years(6yrs of dating, 3yrs of when are you going to marry me, 1yr engagement). Eventually she gave me a schitt or get off the pot date and I gave in. Our marriage lasted about 5yrs.

For me it had nothing to do with me not being into her nor sharing our life together. It had everything to do about feeling controlled by an antiquated, sexist custom so we could spend a bunch of money and have the government meddle in our affairs when it ended. Marriage was not going to change how I functioned in my relationship so I saw no point. It was not going to improve nor guarantee anything therefore they are pointless when you aren't going to have kids.

The second girl that wanted marriage I told her NO. She lasted 2 more years and I finally ended it.

The girl I have now is much younger than me and asked if I would ever consider marriage. I told her HELL NO. She told me "well thats ok, you are amazing enough I wouldn't have to be married". Time will tell if she changes her tune on that or not.

Its no big deal. If thats what they want then they can go find some other chump. I have no problem finding another one. New women can be like fresh air anyways.

But with the two girls that asked for it, they both went on to marry beta males that they despise. How do I know? Because I still hear from them on occasion. They'd both happily come back to me if I wanted it.

So what guy would you rather be? Marriage is meaningless. Its doesn't benefit the male unless she makes more $$$ than you and your'e a mooch.
Why would you get married if you expected it was going to end?
 

itouchyou

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D@mn, this guy enjoyed sex with this girl for more than six years and then he´s like "Wedding? Nah, that´s patriarchal, oppresive and sexist etc. I cant marry you because Im a male feminist".

Translation: I dont want to marry you. I have been working on myself all these years and Im pretty sure I can pull someone better.

This guy is a piece of work (in a good way?). She lost the game and deep down she knows it; that´s why she´s been snapping at him and making up fake fights.

Most likely she´s gonna break up with him and ride the carousel until she finds a beta chump provider. She´s gonna have One Night Stands and Same Night Lays with Chads & Tyrones while she makes the beta wait for sex and he´s gonna marry her.
Or he's smart enough to know that getting married "officially" with the government forcing you to sign documents, literally has no benefit for a man.

I would do a wedding in front of religious figures but I would do everything possible to never sign a piece of paper saying I'm married.
 

Agamemnon43

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6 years of ltr and the topic of a wedding has never been brought up before? This guy created more problems for himself now by not being upfront and honest about his intentions. You have to at least indirectly assess whether she would like to get married one day, if not directly. If she wants and you never do, end it right there before wasting years of your lives and find someone more compatible.
 

SW15

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I never did expect it to end. What made you think that?
I think most men going into marriages that way. Some might think women go into marriages that way, but Caleb Jones wrote an article that weddings mean nothing to women and most women enter marriages knowing they will end at some point.


6 years of ltr and the topic of a wedding has never been brought up before? This guy created more problems for himself now by not being upfront and honest about his intentions. You have to at least indirectly assess whether she would like to get married one day, if not directly. If she wants and you never do, end it right there before wasting years of your lives and find someone more compatible.
This is mostly true. He might not have wanted to announce his stance on marriage on the first date, but at least within the first year.
 
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