"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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I Finally Didn't Mess This Up!!!

Mayfly

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I was in the library tonight and I saw this HB 8 sitting at a computer station. I made eye contact with her and we shared smiles, then I went upstairs for a second. I came back down and she was still there, so I sat down right next to her and began to look for some stuff that I needed for class. She seemed a little flustered with her work, so I took her mind off of it for a little bit. She had a Philadelphia Eagles jersey on so I opened with "did you watch the game last night?" She said yeah, and we developed a real nice conversation, intermittent with getting printouts and stuff, but a good one nonetheless. I found that she works for the team and she goes to a lot of the games. We had some common friends or acquaintances. After a short while of silence after her friend came over to talk to her about something important, I attempted to close. It was my first number close, so I was kinda nervous. But it came out pretty well.

Me: Hey, I really enjoyed meeting you (shakes her hand)
HB: Yeah, it was really nice. Tell Matt I said hello (one of our mutual acquaintances)
Me: No worries. I was fun finally meeting another passionate Eagles fan as me. I would like to continue this conversation sometime, do you mind if I get your number?
HB: (after a short pause) Sure...it's ....

I smiled and left. I guess I'll give her a call tomorrow to see what's up. Thoughts on how I did? :cool:
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Rex Man

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+ Damn good opening with something relevant to you observation. That's how it's done baby

+ Good job going for # close instead of pvssying out

- # close sounded a bit unnatural

Good job man.
 

Mayfly

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Rex Man said:
+ Damn good opening with something relevant to you observation. That's how it's done baby

+ Good job going for # close instead of pvssying out

- # close sounded a bit unnatural

Good job man.

yeah man...I was kinda nervous cause she was pretty hot lol

Other thoughts
 

DJArlington

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first off bro - congrats. takes balls at the library.

during the close you could just say next time "we should get together sometime, then see her reaction. if she says yea then just ask for her number. remember when love attention and sometimes we cant figure out their true intentions.

good job.
 

Sun Tzu

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Good job, Mayfly.

One point, though... Never ask for a number. You should always tell her to write it down or to punch it into your cell phone.

This fulfills her innate need to be led. It makes you look very confident.

But you did great, all the same.

Sun Tzu
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Mayfly

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Can I get an opinion on how I should go about getting a date soon out of her?

Calling her tomorrow and opening with a Philadelphia Eagles comment or what?
 

danielzxc

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Enough with the Eagles man, it's gonna start sounding played out. She seems to like you man, so move on from the Eagles gimmick.
 

Mayfly

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what would someone suggest then...quick convo ask her out for a drink at a bar?
 

sparky0000

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Mayfly said:
I was in the library tonight and I saw this HB 8 sitting at a computer station. I made eye contact with her and we shared smiles, then I went upstairs for a second. I came back down and she was still there, so I sat down right next to her and began to look for some stuff that I needed for class. She seemed a little flustered with her work, so I took her mind off of it for a little bit. She had a Philadelphia Eagles jersey on so I opened with "did you watch the game last night?"
dude, it was going good until the part about her wearing a sport team's jersey :crackup: . things really have gone to hell in america. girls can't be considered "hot" when they wear such things. she should have heels on. probably a nice skirt. makeup. things like that. it is what god intended.

seriously, what type of girl decides to go out in public with such a thing on? mmm...come to think of it...most american girls are built like linebackers these days. ok, now it is starting to make some sense.
 

Mayfly

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nah...HBs wear sports jerseys all the time over here...


any suggestions on how i can continue this when i call tomorrow/today
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Pimp-sicle

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Mayfly:

First off good job on approaching a girl that your attracted to, if your getting good EC and smiles its your duty as a man to approach. Secondly, that was a great opener, you found a common interest and started off the conversation well.

Now about the not so good. As someone already said, you asked for her number instead of telling her. As subtle as this seems, its HUGE in a girl's mind. Its the difference between who's in charge and who's crossing their fingers hoping for the best. And for the love of god how much more unnatural can you sound by saying "I would like to continue this conversation sometime." Ugh!! I know somewhere in cyberspace David D will be blushing, but that line is very unnatural and corny. I realize it was your first cold approach so I'll cut you some slack.

Now, wait it out a few days. Don't be so anxious to go out with her. Its ok to be excited, but don't show her that. Calling her the next day would show her that. If she's interested in the least she will be waiting for your call. As far as date ideas, I'd take her to some type of competitive event. Bowling, mini-golf, the gym etc.

Lastly learn to dig deeper than her looks, try and see if she's actually worth your time or if she's just a pretty face. Lots of guys don't think about the whole point of a date when they're out with a hot girl. They're too worried about trying not to mess it up. That's the kiss of death. Relax, and be confident and you'll be fine.




PIMP
 

Mayfly

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Yeah...I need to work on my closes, but this is a good start


I got my confidence up on this one. I am going to try to meet and # close a girl in my class tomorrow that gave me real nice eye contact and a smile on Monday.

I also have a semi-formal for my university cross country team, so I was hoping to have a date by then. That's why I wanted to call that girl I met today tomorrow. But any more suggestions will be great.
 

realsmoothie

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sparky0000 said:
dude, it was going good until the part about her wearing a sport team's jersey :crackup: . things really have gone to hell in america. girls can't be considered "hot" when they wear such things. she should have heels on. probably a nice skirt. makeup. things like that. it is what god intended.

seriously, what type of girl decides to go out in public with such a thing on? mmm...come to think of it...most american girls are built like linebackers these days. ok, now it is starting to make some sense.
A skirt and high heels? Surely you jest. Shouldn't she be barefoot? And now that I think of it, what's she doing studying in the library, shouldn't she be cooking your dinner in the kitchen?
 

Mayfly

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So I talked to that girl that gave me good eye contact in my class. We had our final today, and I pretty much waited after I finished it for her to be done. Her friend left, so I was thinking it would be the perfect opportunity. So she got done and I walked up and dropped my test off, and went back to get my belongings. We both walked outside at the same time and I opened it with "how do you think you did on the test?" We had a good conversation, to the point where she forgot her friend was sitting on a bench across from us. I had the isolation and everything. I asked what she was doing tonight, and she said celebrating at a local bar. I thought that was enough and didn't ask for her number. I should have! Dammit. I plan on going to the bar she said tonight with a friend of mine to chance upon her. I am banging my head against the wall for not asking her number, but my confidence is sky high right now.
 

Charm

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Dont go te the bar tonight or you'll look like an AFC intending to meet her. If you didnt have the foresight to make plans, she'll realize youre following her and her IL will most likely drop. Better to go somewhere else IMO but you are welcome to test my theory and prove me wrong.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Rex Man

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It doesn't really matter whether you go to the bar or not. Just as long as you're in the right state of mind. Go looking for females. Keep approaching girls.
I mean, you WILL see her again, but if she seems important enough that you will
try to chance upon her, knock it out. Whatever you do, keep it smooth and go with the flow.
 

Mayfly

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I guess this is becoming my own personal journal...but onwards

Last night I was invited to a pretty big party in this apartment building on my campus. I planned on going to that, then out to the bars. My friend cancelled on me to go out to the bars saying he wasn't feeling in the mood for that, so I went to the party. I knew no one there, but I felt like I was the king of the party. I went up to a lot of guys who were there, it was a total sausage fest at first. I made some good contacts, and when some girls entered, I got some nice looks. I brought this guy I met up to a set of girls, but unfortunately i couldn't think of my opening. I was real deep in the drink at that point...9 shots in 40 minutes. So the night goes on, a group of guys are chillin around the keg, so I go up and we just start pounding back beers. This girl, HB 6 comes up to the keg and asks for a fill.

HB: Can i get some? (holding her cup out)
Me: Nah, I'm real sorry. We gotta cut you off.
HB: What? You don't even know me.
Me: Well I guess this is my opportunity to (winks)

So we talk for a while, and it's going real well. Eventually we start dancing and I give her a little kiss, nothing serious. She turns around and pulls my shirt towards her, and we just start making out in the middle of the room. I usually don't do that, but I just didn't care. After we kiss for a good three minutes...

HB: I don't know if I should be doing this. My brother is here.
Me: I didn't know you were into that kind of stuff.
HB: Shut up (playfully slaps my arm)

So we walk into the other apartment, and she sees some people she knows in there. While she is holding my hand, this girl (HB 8) passes me and bumps into me.

Me: If you want to talk to me that bad, then just tell me.
HB: (confused and smiling) Oh really.

So we talk for a while and I almost go for the kiss close, but I figure I don't want to play the first girl that much. HB 6 gets more aggressive with me, holding my hand tighter (girls love competition). I meet her brother, and we have some good conversations. She asked him if she could go home with me that night. He was like, "nah...I don't have a problem with it." I didn't even invite her home yet!

So we talk a little longer and kiss a little bit, then she was like...

HB: So you're not going to be a gentleman and invite me back to your place?
Me: Someone's a little forward aren't they?
HB: Maybe

Long story short, we go back to my place and hook up a little bit. Let's see what I can do the rest of this weekend.
 

realsmoothie

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Mayfly said:
I guess this is becoming my own personal journal...but onwards

Last night I was invited to a pretty big party in this apartment building on my campus. I planned on going to that, then out to the bars. My friend cancelled on me to go out to the bars saying he wasn't feeling in the mood for that, so I went to the party. I knew no one there, but I felt like I was the king of the party. I went up to a lot of guys who were there, it was a total sausage fest at first. I made some good contacts, and when some girls entered, I got some nice looks. I brought this guy I met up to a set of girls, but unfortunately i couldn't think of my opening. I was real deep in the drink at that point...9 shots in 40 minutes. So the night goes on, a group of guys are chillin around the keg, so I go up and we just start pounding back beers. This girl, HB 6 comes up to the keg and asks for a fill.

HB: Can i get some? (holding her cup out)
Me: Nah, I'm real sorry. We gotta cut you off.
HB: What? You don't even know me.
Me: Well I guess this is my opportunity to (winks)

So we talk for a while, and it's going real well. Eventually we start dancing and I give her a little kiss, nothing serious. She turns around and pulls my shirt towards her, and we just start making out in the middle of the room. I usually don't do that, but I just didn't care. After we kiss for a good three minutes...

HB: I don't know if I should be doing this. My brother is here.
Me: I didn't know you were into that kind of stuff.
HB: Shut up (playfully slaps my arm)

So we walk into the other apartment, and she sees some people she knows in there. While she is holding my hand, this girl (HB 8) passes me and bumps into me.

Me: If you want to talk to me that bad, then just tell me.
HB: (confused and smiling) Oh really.

So we talk for a while and I almost go for the kiss close, but I figure I don't want to play the first girl that much. HB 6 gets more aggressive with me, holding my hand tighter (girls love competition). I meet her brother, and we have some good conversations. She asked him if she could go home with me that night. He was like, "nah...I don't have a problem with it." I didn't even invite her home yet!

So we talk a little longer and kiss a little bit, then she was like...

HB: So you're not going to be a gentleman and invite me back to your place?
Me: Someone's a little forward aren't they?
HB: Maybe

Long story short, we go back to my place and hook up a little bit. Let's see what I can do the rest of this weekend.
That is some f*cking all-star ****y/funny, man. You must have some brass ones down there. Do you consider yourself good looking? It seems to me that the women are just waitin' for ya.
 

realsmoothie

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DAMN that is one ugly shirt!

Sorry, LOL! The girls obviously like it!
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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