I enjoy sleeping with this girl, but she wants to get serious

kleathe1

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How do you handle dealing with the situation where you like sleeping with her, but don't want to be in a relationship with her and she is pushing for it? I'm not trying to break her heart, but I'm not trying to settle down with her either.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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How do you handle dealing with the situation where you like sleeping with her, but don't want to be in a relationship with her and she is pushing for it? I'm not trying to break her heart, but I'm not trying to settle down with her either.
Did you promise / imply exclusivity?
 

BaronOfHair

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How do you handle dealing with the situation where you like sleeping with her, but don't want to be in a relationship with her and she is pushing for it?
By saying "I'm not interested in being a couple with anyone right now". If she's fiending for a guy who IS in the market for exclusivity, girl is free to go find herself such a fella. Unless you all are living in Saudi Arabia, in which case it's unwise for us to even be having this conversation...

The Committee for the Promotion of Virtue and the Prevention of Vice has likely been monitoring your electronic communications, and is probably now drawing up warrants for both yours and this chick's arrest. Verily as I loathe being a killjoy, I'm compelled to also observe that Bin Salman's henchmen may very well behead you two by the end of this week, lest they be accussed of failing to uphold ḥisba
 
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AmsterdamAssassin

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If you didn't promise exclusivity, where's the problem?

One of my lovers is clearly angling for more attention, but she's not going to get it. If she's not satisfied with the attention I give her, she can find someone else.

Women often claim to be into ENM, but when push comes to shove they cannot handle non-exclusivity.
 

BeExcellent

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Advice from the old lady:

You tell her you are not looking for an exclusive thing with anyone at this time. Either she plays by your rules or she moves on. Don't lie and don't allow yourself to be bamboozled into a relationship to maintain steady sex and to avoid conflict. That's not honest with yourself, but many men end up nagged into unfulfilling relationships driven by pushy women.

Then they wonder how they married a battle axe.

If she keeps pushing tell her the pushiness is a turn off.

If a woman is relationship minded she's going to realize you are not really into her by your behavior. She will be pushy & either put up with it a while or move on to find someone who will be a boyfriend etc.

Plates have a shelf life & eventually break.
 

Scaramouche

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Hi Kleathe,
Whatever you do,don't be honest or frank with her,it will initially upset her then,after discussion with her Mates, encourage her to be spiteful....You just say in a soft and friendly way,yeah...Sigh.... I would love a committed relationship,in fact I dream of having one and you're just the sort of Girl I am looking for,but I have quite a few objectives I must achieve before that,the biggest problems that break relationships are financial,I passionately believe I must....Get that degree,promotion,whatever,In the mean time let's just enjoy what we have found together....Look into her eyes...please!...For both our sakes!
 
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BackInTheGame78

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Tell her you like the way things are right now and that you are happy to continue as is and see where things go...even tho you know they aren't going anywhere.

It's not up to you to "not break her heart".

She is an adult and can make her own decisions. All you need to do is give her a sliver of hope that it could turn into something more without making any promises and things should continue for a while.

You'll like reach a tipping point at 3-4 months tho, which is when women either want more or will leave for a man who will give them more. Of course there's always exceptions of women who will stay around longer. That is the EXCEPTION, not the rule tho.

If it's been that long already, then this might be the tipping point.

That's the nature of the game. Women want relationships, if you aren't willing to give that to them then you are limiting the length of time you will access to their pvssy. You can't have it both ways. You must learn to accept this and stop acting like this is some problem to figure out. It's not. That's how life works.

If things don't progress past a certain point over a period of time then the woman will give up expecting it ever will and will move on.
 

Hamurabimbi

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How do you handle dealing with the situation where you like sleeping with her, but don't want to be in a relationship with her and she is pushing for it? I'm not trying to break her heart, but I'm not trying to settle down with her either.
Almost every girl wants a relationship. It’s just the way it is. And. They are relentless.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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Almost every girl wants a relationship. It’s just the way it is. And. They are relentless.
And if you cannot hold your ground, your 'frame' was weak.
 

Captain Rizz

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How do you handle dealing with the situation where you like sleeping with her, but don't want to be in a relationship with her and she is pushing for it? I'm not trying to break her heart, but I'm not trying to settle down with her either.
Just curious: why aren't you trying to settle down with her? I mean, you can date her for a long time before putting a ring on it. But many have made the mistake of sticking to a "grass is always greener" mentality and then letting something wonderful slip through their fingers, which they can only sigh about in retrospect
 

HaleyBaron

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How do you handle dealing with the situation where you like sleeping with her, but don't want to be in a relationship with her and she is pushing for it? I'm not trying to break her heart, but I'm not trying to settle down with her either.
Her: "We should become official/ move in together/ go on a vacation together"
Me: "Too busy."

Just deal with putting her down. Eventually, she will leave you for someone who will give her what she wants. That's fine. You won on being on her mind forever. Her next boyfriend/ husband will not be able to live up to what you did so take pride in that.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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Her: "We should become official/ move in together/ go on a vacation together"
Me: "I think we shouldn't and I go on motorcycle camping trips by myself."
 

kleathe1

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Just curious: why aren't you trying to settle down with her? I mean, you can date her for a long time before putting a ring on it. But many have made the mistake of sticking to a "grass is always greener" mentality and then letting something wonderful slip through their fingers, which they can only sigh about in retrospect
Just curious: why aren't you trying to settle down with her? I mean, you can date her for a long time before putting a ring on it. But many have made the mistake of sticking to a "grass is always greener" mentality and then letting something wonderful slip through their fingers, which they can only sigh about in retrospect
There are just several things that I know will be issues between us later (mostly her spirituality and our differences in beliefs) and I really want someone younger. The sex is good, I do enjoy her company or I wouldn't be messing with her in the first place.
 

Fortune_favors_the_bold

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How do you handle dealing with the situation where you like sleeping with her, but don't want to be in a relationship with her and she is pushing for it? I'm not trying to break her heart, but I'm not trying to settle down with her either.
If you meet a decent girl and for reasons regarding your desire or logistics cant provide a relationship to her, just let her go.

Losing a couple of years for a man is no big deal but for a woman can make or break the future of her life.
 

Giovanni SouthSide

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“You're going to make a really great girlfriend for some guy out there" that is all you got to tell her.

Reject her as a potential GF. She will see no hope or future so she will distance herself now. When she meets a new stud she views as potential BF she will disappear for good and will try to do the same to him.
When he disappoints her as well you might receive a "hey" text message from her on some whatever day evening.
“War brides” women are conditioned to move on quickly from failed relationships with men let it be ltr’s, minis, fwbs, etc. She will be alright, man.
 
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