I broke up a 2 year old relationship

Focal core

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After the incident I am actually better now maybe the crying helped me and I don’t feel any anger(weird) I am ready to let this one go. I think holding back just gave me more pain.
Nothing weird in it.. Honoring your feelings is always a way to go towards healing.. Congratulations.
 
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Clamslammer

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After the incident I am actually better now maybe the crying helped me and I don’t feel any anger(weird) I am ready to let this one go. I think holding back just gave me more pain.

Time again I forget that women are just what they are no matter how long you be with them it was foolish of me to think she was any different or anyone could be.

I just went through my old pictures where I was in the best shape being happy, exercising and confident.

My health is something i will be taking care of moving forward. I always wanted to learn swimming and I think I will start that on weekends for now. Deleted our pictures, texts from my phone blocked her contacts.

Sosuave has always been the place where I share things when women let me down and the guys here have always helped me gain perspective. Thanks
Do not beat yourself up dude 95% of girls are pretty much not relationship material. Your job is to weed out the crap to find the small percentage that is quality. The pros are that you learned this early and learned what too look out for in regards to red flags for your future relationships without going through a divorce and kids...count yourself lucky. I know its hard out there because you thought she was quality and you think you will not find another but you will. Always focus on yourself and girls will throw themselves at you, your job is to screen them.

I bet you saw the red flags even before getting into the relationship but you just ignored them because you did not know what to look for and you were infatuated with her looks and attention. The day you can reject an attractive girl because she does not have the qualities you look for is the day you know you have arrived because it is hard to reject a nice piece of a$$.
 

andreihaha

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Imagine if you had married her, dodged a bullet. Imagine her stealing your kid to be raised by this new guy lol. Once a cheater always a cheater. None of my exes that cheated went on to have good relationships, just bounce around forever.
That last line is pure gold.
Never thought about this, but you're right, my cheating exes do the same.
 
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bcude

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That last line is pure gold.
Never thought about this, but you're right, my cheating exes do the same.
Once heard a cheater talk about that in media, how easy it is to cheat again once you've already done it. It's like an addiction almost and they really have to restrain themselves not to do it again. Sad really. It becomes their way of coping with certain situations, a learned behavior.
 

stormrider

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There is no such thing as “relationship material,” “the one”, etc. These are all social constructs.

There is attraction, chemistry, and connection. All of these things fade away over time.

And just because you have it with one person does not mean you cannot with another person.

If you get rid of all social constructs, romance becomes fun. Because there are no delusional expectations.

A lot of women are having their cake and eating it too nowadays. They live in the “fun” world and the world of social constructs at the same time.

But the average guy only seems to be living in the social construct world where he’s looking for unconditional love and the one as if these things have any meaning.

It’s a made up world. Most women know this. They’ll give you your fantasy though if it makes you feel better. But they can also go party with the fun guy and have inconsequential sex.

Seems like the average woman is more capable of living in reality than a lot of guys are these days.

A woman can easily out put you into a relationship frame while at the same time sleep with a guy just because he has a huge penis.

Their duplicitous nature is something every player knows about. It starts off at puberty. You don’t have to be heart broken or divorce raped to find out about it.
 
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bcude

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There is no such thing as “relationship material,” “the one”, etc. These are all social constructs.

There is attraction, chemistry, and connection. All of these things fade away over time.

And just because you have it with one person does not mean you cannot with another person.

If you get rid of all social constructs, romance becomes fun. Because there are no delusional expectations.

A lot of women are having their cake and eating it too nowadays. They live in the “fun” world and the world of social constructs at the same time.

But the average guy only seems to be living in the social construct world where he’s looking for unconditional love and the one as if these things have any meaning.

It’s a made up world. Most women know this. They’ll give you your fantasy though if it makes you feel better. But they can also go party with the fun guy and have inconsequential sex.

Seems like the average woman is more capable of living in reality than a lot of guys are these days.

A woman can easily out put you into a relationship frame while at the same time sleep with a guy just because he has a huge penis.

Their duplicitous nature is something every player knows about. It starts off at puberty. You don’t have to be heart broken or divorce raped to find out about it.
"Men are the romantics pretending to be realists and women; vice versa."
Iron Rule of Tomassi #6
Women are utterly incapable of loving a man in the way that a man expects to be loved.

- Rollo Tomassi
 

rayv12

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**Update
It is almost more than a week now and I am doing good. She has been constantly trying to get in touch with me. The other day she wrote me multiple emails stating how much we were good together and she can’t live without me etc sending me our pictures . Last night got a call from a random number and it was her I just acted normal and said that she should move on as I am not interested in getting back. She thinks she still has chance in the future after all of this and she can’t be with anyone else. WTF!
 

AttackFormation

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**Update
It is almost more than a week now and I am doing good. She has been constantly trying to get in touch with me. The other day she wrote me multiple emails stating how much we were good together and she can’t live without me etc sending me our pictures . Last night got a call from a random number and it was her I just acted normal and said that she should move on as I am not interested in getting back. She thinks she still has chance in the future after all of this and she can’t be with anyone else. WTF!
She wants her sense of power over you back, not "you". She is trying to nail you with emotional hooks, seeing which one will stick, to get that sense back.
 

andreihaha

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She wants her sense of power over you back, not "you". She is trying to nail you with emotional hooks, seeing which one will stick, to get that sense back.
You're not necessarily right about this. The "no contact" probably made her doubt her own decision. Maybe she regrets letting him go, maybe she still has feelings, but she migh as well just feel insecure and just try to keep him on the hook for some validation. We can't know for sure and it doesn't matter that much to him.
What we do know for sure is that his "fk that b1tch" attitude is working in his benefit. Don't fix it if it ain't broken, my man! She doesn't deserve your respect, that's for sure.

Yes, my overall point is to let him know that he shouldn't take her seriously or respond to her.
Agreed.
 
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AttackFormation

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You're not necessarily right about this. The "no contact" probably made her doubt her own decision. Maybe she regrets letting him go, maybe she still has feelings, but she migh as well just feel insecure and just try to keep him on the hook for some validation. We can't know for sure and it doesn't matter that much to him.
What we do know for sure is that his "fk that b1tch" attitude is working in his benefit. Don't fix it if it ain't broken, my man! She doesn't deserve your respect, that's for sure.
Yes, my overall point is to let him know that he shouldn't take her seriously or respond to her.
 
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corrector

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I broke up with my ltr a week ago when my friend saw her at some bar with a guy she works with. She was ignoring my calls and acting weird for weeks.
A year ago she was all over me, now I am going through some health issues, gained weight(>10kg) and a new job where I work (>11hrs).

I saw the relationship going down the drain and broke up stating I don't wish her to see anymore as I felt disrespected by her behaviour and she should be more open about things rather than lie and party with some dude.

She is still partying with a new guy who is all over her Instagram. I felt terrible last night got drunk broke NC after a week and ended up answering her call asking(crying) why she did this to me, she said she just wanted to enjoy a bit and she still loves me.

I am a bit lost at the moment after 2 years when I thought she is the one, and things are getting serious she starts going out with some dude over me.
Is Love even a thing?
At least it was longer than 9 months.
 

bcude

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Show her just plain indifference when you interact, that's the most powerful thing you can do. Will definately make her go crazy from the sound of it.
 

rayv12

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Show her just plain indifference when you interact, that's the most powerful thing you can do. Will definately make her go crazy from the sound of it.
I don’t want to make anyone crazy. Indifference is the thing to do for sure but not to make her crazy but To make it very clear that the things which happened were not good for any of us and I don’t want anything.

It’s a lesson for both of us.

Also I’ve just realised how much I’ve changed from my true self and need to get back to my best.

Bought some nice clothes, will start my swimming classes beginning next month and plan to start working out soon once I figure out a gym in my budget and I feel great already.
 

rayv12

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Yes, my overall point is to let him know that he shouldn't take her seriously or respond to her.
This was the girl after I went NC on the cam girl if you remember a while back. I’m getting used to this ****.
 
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Focal core

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After the incident I am actually better now maybe the crying helped me and I don’t feel any anger(weird) I am ready to let this one go. I think holding back just gave me more pain.

Time again I forget that women are just what they are no matter how long you be with them it was foolish of me to think she was any different or anyone could be.

I just went through my old pictures where I was in the best shape being happy, exercising and confident.

My health is something i will be taking care of moving forward. I always wanted to learn swimming and I think I will start that on weekends for now. Deleted our pictures, texts from my phone blocked her contacts.

Sosuave has always been the place where I share things when women let me down and the guys here have always helped me gain perspective. Thanks
We're drawn to people who match our level of emotional development. Your very best option is to begin to heal and grow, so you can make wiser, more gratifying choices. In the future, cheers to that.
 

Howiestern

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First off, she has absolutely no control over how she feels. It is a mental health point for a woman to act on her sexual drives and breeding strategy.
Like I can't control how I feel when I see a 25yo with long hair, long legs, flat stomach, and big tits in a short skirt. Should I act on my feelings when I'm in a committed relationship?
 

Focal core

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Like I can't control how I feel when I see a 25yo with long hair, long legs, flat stomach, and big tits in a short skirt. Should I act on my feelings when I'm in a committed relationship?
You wouldn't called it committed relationship when youre easily blown away by hot girls. lmao :rofl:
 

MatureDJ

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I broke up with my ltr a week ago ... She was ignoring my calls and acting weird for weeks.
A year ago she was all over me ...

Is Love even a thing?
I had a dumping like that. I now consider any such behavior as being dumped, and I tentatively move on (she could always call).

Oh, and this could happen with a week or two of getting well-sexed.

Here's an old song, performed by a legend, about women being fickle:

 
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