I ALSO realize what has to happen...

[CapedCrusader08]

Look,I didn't want it to come to this. I really didn't. My problem is the feeling of not having put in enough hard work sooner to be whereever I could be at at now,and this feeling of being stuck,not knowing the ropes. Part of it has to do with my own twisted view on things,caused by loneliness. It feels like I have this deep,dark secret,and no one can know about it.

 

[horaholic]

Allright. This is my LAST attempt. If this doesnt help you, nothing will.

enjoylifenow

CC08, this is just for you, keep it a secret!

 

[DonJuan11]

Look,I didn't want it to come to this. I really didn't. My problem is the feeling of not having put in enough hard work sooner to be whereever I could be at at now,and this feeling of being stuck,not knowing the ropes. Part of it has to do with my own twisted view on things,caused by loneliness. It feels like I have this deep,dark secret,and no one can know about it.

Your secret is your parents pay for everything you own and your schooling, so you are rich.

 

[Igetit!]

Your secret is your parents pay for everything you own and your schooling, so you are rich.

DonJuan11,you're dead set on this fact,aren't you? It seems like every single response you give to Crusader goes back to this one thing of his parents providing for him. It would do him some good to stand on his own two feet,but even he would seek out and find to downside to doing this.

Boy,I meant this thread to be a help to the others here who I see streaks of bitterness in because of this guy,and he just came here and contaminated my thread with more of his hopeless despair.

The horror...the horror.

 

[CapedCrusader08]

I'll say this for now. Aside from having a hard time taking advice,it's a habit, the help I need can only,some of it,come from here,and a professional therapist. Ever since finding this site,I have been both inspired and overwhelmed for many reasons.

I just feel like I am the opposite of the described level success on here,and even in life in general. This worries me in many ways,I cannot seemingly pull my **** together,and this causes great stress for me. Add on the constant sense of loneliness,people say they are afraid of being alone,I have felt that way for a long time. Perhaps I am unable to open to people,due to events that have happened to me before,and have had a long lasting affect on me. All I can say is,this cycle keeps repeating it's self,and I want for it to end.

I mean,it's pretty much been go to work,go home for me. I go out every once in a while,but it's usually someone I know put's something together. I still don't have a decent grip on the idea of game and seduction. Alot of this is possibly the affect of looking at pornography over the years,and whatever affect it may have had on me. Maybe I have a problem with being sexual,or am affected by depression.

 

[horaholic]

Obviously , you didnt even click the link I put down for you.

 

[Igetit!]

Obviously , you didnt even click the link I put down for you.

And that surprised you,Horaholic? He's been ignoring advice since his first day here. If he ignored the previous 5000 attempts to help him,what made you think this latest attempt from you would help?

It's like I said: It's not the advice in our replies he wants,it's simply the replies themselves.

 

[SharinganUser]

It's like I said: It's not the advice in our replies he wants,it's simply the replies themselves.

I wonder if he is some sort of reply vampire whose life is extended everytime someone replies to him...

 

[Igetit!]

I wonder if he is some sort of reply vampire whose life is extended everytime someone replies to him...

Exactly. I logged back on simply to rep you. You hit the nail right on the head.
This is how I see things with him:
He feels bad. His life according to him sucks for all of the thousand reasons he has previously mentioned. Since he feels bad about his life,he joins up here,and makes a thread to get info to make things better for himself.
Now check this out:Our replies are valuable because we only have 10 per day. So when he makes a thread and we reply,we're giving something that we value to him. And he knows that. So us giving something we value to him makes him feel valuable. You see that? We reply,then for a few moments,he feels valued,which destracts him from the way he feels about his life. Then once we stop replying to his thread and it get buried,the feeling of value goes away,then the negative feelings he has because of his life return.

So what does he do then? He starts another thread,gets some more replies,then feeling of value returns......until we stop replying,then the cycle repeats itself.

He uses the threads like a drug addict uses drugs. Instead of dealing head on with the issues in his life,he gets "hi" from our replies so he doesn't have to think about them.

It's funny. We meant the replies to help him out,but instead of taking the content of them to improve his life,he took the value of the fact that we only have 10 per day and transferred that value to himself lol.

 

[CapedCrusader08]

you got this all wrong. Yes I am unhappy,no, I am not trying to find value in this site. I am looking for value in life,I just have gotten confused over time on how to find that.

honestly yeah,there is/has been this part of me that want's sympathy. I am just unable to put something together.

Believe me,I would love to come onto here with a success report,about something,anything.but I get so overwhelmed that trying to get that done seems hard. I know this is making excuses,but it's something like anxiety,or feeling inferior,or comparing myself to others.

 

[cw92]

you got this all wrong. Yes I am unhappy,no, I am not trying to find value in this site. I am looking for value in life,I just have gotten confused over time on how to find that.

honestly yeah,there is/has been this part of me that want's sympathy. I am just unable to put something together.

Believe me,I would love to come onto here with a success report,about something,anything.but I get so overwhelmed that trying to get that done seems hard. I know this is making excuses,but it's something like anxiety,or feeling inferior,or comparing myself to others.

can you read?

if so shut the **** up, and read Igetit!'s posts..no one wants you come in here with ur negativity

 

[DonJuan11]

you got this all wrong. Yes I am unhappy,no, I am not trying to find value in this site. I am looking for value in life,I just have gotten confused over time on how to find that.

Your value is to stop living off your parents and find a job, stop having them pay for everything all the time.

 

[Igetit!]

Your value is to stop living off your parents and find a job, stop having them pay for everything all the time.

Ohhh. Now it all makes sense. He still lives with mommy and daddy. No wonder he keeps complaining bout missing out on things and how he should be farther along in life,dating,and other normal aspects of growing up. I think I can kind of see where he's coming from now. It's kids,children who live with their parents and need to be taken care of. Having your own place to live,dating/sex,and emotionally and financially supporting yourself are all adult responsibilties,whereas he's deficient in ALL three. Oh yes,I see now.

Dude feels like life is passing him by. He's right. He's still at home with his parents at 23 years old,while most people his age are out living on their own supporting themselves. Some are in relationships,some are married,and some are just single. Their relationship statuses may differ,but virtually ALL of them are out of house and taking care of themselves. DonJuan11 is 100% right.

This is "in part" why all if our replies failed. You have to be and at least feel like some sort of a man whenever it comes to you meeting and attracting women. No wonder he keeps avoiding what he needs to do to be successful with women,he doesn't "feel" like a man. How could he living off mommy and daddy. When you have your own place,your own car,your own job to support yourself,and not only that,but you YOURSELF can help someone else out finacially from time to time,the feeling of pride,self-respect,and confidence you have in this area should spill over into your social/dating life as well.
Since this part of his life is out of wack,then of course he's not going to have the confidence to ask a girl out. And even if he did,and she said yes,the lack of self-sufficiency and confidence that comes from standing on your own two feet would eat away at his confience in being with the girl. And guys,we ALL know women can smell weakness a mile away.

All the advice we've given him till now hasn't worked and isn't going to as long as his living off his parents undermines his confidence as a man.

Or to just put it plainly as I said in the original post,we CAN'T help him.

 

[2Pac_Makaveli]

Sorry If I'm Causing More Hassle And Ignorance, But Igetit Is Right

You Get A Job

Job Involves Being Social / Meeting People / Gaining Pride And Self Respect Self Worth

I Know You've Probably Never Had A Job And Think It Is Easier To ****ing Bum Off Your Parents And Don't Know Any Different, But Take It From Me You'll Be A 200% Better Man Than You Are Now, You Sound Like A Whining B!tch, Sorry But You Need To Hear The Truth. As They Say "cruel To Be Kind"

Job Pretty Much Can Form Who You Are As The Skills You Learn From Your Job Open Up Your Social Life, Think Of Getting A Job As The Key To Being A Man.

You Get A Job, Car, Become Independent And Free From The Sorry State Your In Now.

If I Get One More Reply To This I Will Personally Get The I.p. Address Hence What Building The Computer Is At And Send Anthrax Through The Post.

So Use A ****ing Library.

 

[horaholic]

I believe he does have a job, actually.

Damn, did I just defend him?

 

[2Pac_Makaveli]

You are both going to die from anthrax poisoning.

 

[2Pac_Makaveli]

You are both going to die from anthrax poisoning.

 

[2Pac_Makaveli]

And horaholic you are a total a$$hole for posting that enjoylife now link.

If you so called f ucking "men" want a real website for seduction rather than this pisstake I can;t believe i'm actually giving you this but it's

www.mylazysundays.com

Peace

 

[CapedCrusader08]

yes.I said it before. I do have a job. I enjoy it,but it's been more of a focuse for me the past few years. As opposed to things like education,which has been on and off,self respect,esteem,confidence,etc. I would like to be on my own, but certain things seemingly permit that. But this sense of lack of that,or things having passed by,overtook when I was younger. I know you're not a therapist,but I just want to make things clear. It begins and ends with confidence,or is it more? this is something I need to do on my own,but it feels I have been waiting for things to change for me in so many ways,or it's the way I look at the world and how things seem set up against me somehow. Yeah,there's been a feeling of something missing,an emptiness. As Igetit said,the feeling of not feeling like a man. But,I would want to avoid this constant compensation,you know where you constantly do things to try and prove you're a man,cause to me,that's how people get tricked or used,and I wrong in assessing that?

 

[Igetit!]

I believe he does have a job, actually.

Damn, did I just defend him?

Well,if he does have a job,then cool. My bad. He has a job,but who pays the light bill where he lives? Who pays the rent,car note,water,phone,cable at his residence? Does he? And even if he does,all that means is that the source of all his negative feeling and emotions just comes from somewhere other than him not supporting himself.

You say he has a job. Great.

Now what?