guys, i'll probably meet a coworker I dated several months ago, whom I had sex with, then I became needy and clingy and, as expected, she tried to LJBF me but got the "thanks, but no thanks" answer. I walked away and 3-4 months have passed now. What's the best answer to her likely "I'm sorry that things didn't work out"? Of course this is not because she's really sorry for me, it's just because she feels uncomfortable and has to stop her hamster running thanks my unlikely validation
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
how would you reply to this?
- Thread starter joker79
- Start date
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Man up and own the fact that you like her.
Face the reality of her disinterest without blaming her for it, or demanding to be treated according to some special protocol of how you think guys should be treated.
Accept the pain and frustration without covering it up or pretending not to care. Its brave to be vulnerable, its brave to love someone who doesnt requite it, and the heroes reward is often suffering. Any shortcut over these truths I see as something that will hinder your development as a man.
Ego-protection and saving face is beneath us, that is my feeling.
Face the reality of her disinterest without blaming her for it, or demanding to be treated according to some special protocol of how you think guys should be treated.
Accept the pain and frustration without covering it up or pretending not to care. Its brave to be vulnerable, its brave to love someone who doesnt requite it, and the heroes reward is often suffering. Any shortcut over these truths I see as something that will hinder your development as a man.
Ego-protection and saving face is beneath us, that is my feeling.
Skyline
Master Don Juan
Sounds like to she's trying to satisfy her ego. I would respond with:joker79 said:
Nothing.
Just walk away from her, just like you did before.
nismo-4
Moderator
- Joined
- Jan 31, 2005
- Messages
- 4,438
- Reaction score
- 1,142
Walk away. Say nothing. Drop her ass. Your princess is in another castle anyway.
Case closed. Exit the courtroom.
Case closed. Exit the courtroom.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.