"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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How to win her over again?

time2change

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Well, shortly, she was interested in me, we kissed one another once, would go out kinda often, she would talk about marriage, kids with me, etc lol, but problem - I was way too clingy. She is now interested in another guy. She admitted it and stated that I was too needy. Is it possible to win her over again? I don't want to next her yet, she's damn hot.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Renegade357

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time2change said:
I was way too clingy.

Describe what you mean by too clingy. What kind of things would you do to be that way? How often would you text, call? Did you dote on her? Real clingy huggy in person, ect..
 

Plutoman

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Unlikely. You'll have to go without being clingy; ideally, not even speaking to her for a while and reengage sometime in the future, to have a chance with it.

That's my experience, at least. I ended up doing that to a girl, back in high school days. About a year and a half later we had some random contact restarted (she initiated) and I ended up getting a nice evening with a movie at her place.
 

time2change

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Well, I was jealous, would tezt her sometimes too often with questions" whats worng" "Are you mad for sth"? And so on. I also would question her loyalty too often. Ebglish is not my native language so it's kinda difficult for me sometimes to express what I wanna say.
 

alpha_ash

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No winning over a girl who's sucking someone else's ****. You need to next her, go NC, and find other women.

Why would you want to take back a girl who knew you, knew you were in love with her, and then LEFT YOU BY CHOICE for another man? It's blatant disrespect. There are many other women out there who will give you the respect you deserve.

I live by quote: "Treat people the way they treat you." Sure you can give them the benefit of the doubt by being extra-nice in the beginning. Then when they **** up, you **** them up or go NC which is as good as ****ing them up ;)

Enjoy!
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Renegade357

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time2change said:
Well, I was jealous, would tezt her sometimes too often with questions" whats worng" "Are you mad for sth"? And so on. I also would question her loyalty too often. Ebglish is not my native language so it's kinda difficult for me sometimes to express what I wanna say.

Now you know what you did wrong. Tell this girl you wish her well and you're not interested in being friends but if she changes her mind she can call you. Then walk away and don't look back. Do not contact her. It will be hard but you have to man up. That's the best you can do. Learn from your mistakes with the next one.
 

time2change

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She aint sucking nobody's **** at the moment :D well, yeah, I know I did bad, but would like another shot with her. Deleted her of facebook week before, today I texted her again(know it's no good) we have a friendly chat with one another at the moment, but I guess I'll go no contact for a few weeks now. Then I'll see if there's still a chance.
 

Renegade357

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time2change said:
well, yeah, I know I did bad, but would like another shot with her.

There is nothing you can do or say to make her want you more. You can only do things to make her want you less. That's why it's best to do nothing.
 

time2change

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Renegade357 said:
There is nothing you can do or say to make her want you more. You can only do things to make her want you less. That's why it's best to do nothing.
That's what imma do right now. Should I respond to her texts when she contacts me?
 

Renegade357

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time2change said:
Should I respond to her texts when she contacts me?
Yeah, if she contacts you keep the convo super short and then immediately and unemotionally ask her out on a date. If she says no which she probably will just say "Okay.". Then don't contact her again. Repeat forever until she stops contacting you lol. The only reason you want to be communicating with her is to setup date opportunities for sex.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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time2change

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Well, yeah, now as I think more clearly, imma probably next her ass. Apparently that ***** was lying to me. Won't initiate no contact with her. If she starts(and I have a good reason to think that she will) I'll stay short and not too emotional. Will see where this leads. Just interesting how fast can a woman's IL drop... In a few days lol. One day she talks about marriage, etc, a few days later she LJBFs you. Cool.
 

time2change

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ok, deleted her fb, blocked her and moving on. Even if there was a possibility to work everything out at the moment, I still believe that once a cheater, always a cheater.
 

Groblin

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time2change said:
Well, shortly, she was interested in me, we kissed one another once, would go out kinda often, she would talk about marriage, kids with me, etc lol, but problem - I was way too clingy. She is now interested in another guy. She admitted it and stated that I was too needy. Is it possible to win her over again? I don't want to next her yet, she's damn hot.
The more you try, the more you're pushing her away. Forget about her and go after that girl in your dorms. You don't want to give up on her, but giving up is your only hope, seriously. Everyone will tell you, just go no contact. She'll hit you up - the trick is to not answer when/if she calls you. Either way, you win, since you'll have time to heal and move on.

Otherwise, yeah, stick a fork in it, it's done. It's not what you want to hear, but it's the way things generally are.
 

time2change

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lmao, she just texted me asking whether I had deleted her from fb once again. NC
 

VladPatton

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Punch out, Maverick, it's over!
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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P

perseverance

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time2change said:
lmao, she just texted me asking whether I had deleted her from fb once again. NC
Send her a text message telling her to go and snort cocaine out of her Daddy's Ars*hole.

That should get the message across loud and clear.
 

time2change

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Naaah, I just instantly deleted the message, that's all, I don't even have her number anymore, just remembered it when she texted me.
 

Packers2010

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i'm going to give you a mind **** her...


how about she wins over you?


why are you trying to " win her over" ?

lets face it. your never going to "win her over" she isn't the prize to be won here son. YOU ARE!

if it was me. i would put her on the back burner for a bit. you can't just give her everything up front. once she has everything and knows you. then it's game over.

try giving it in small BURSTS. she dose something you like. reward her with a small burst of something. tell her a little bit more about you.

YOU are the tree and SHE is the squirrel that runs around you. be more grounded man. know who you are and what you believe in. have hobbies and hit the gym.

you feel me?
 

time2change

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she texted me a few hours ago asking what I was doing. After an hour I sent her(roughly translated from my language): "I've moved on;)". No response from her since then.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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