How to turn ex into fb?

[Neon Owl]

So I should be going to my ex's house next week, it'll be the first time we've seen eachother since the split. We'll likely be having a few drinks and ordering some food in.
I haven't mentioned anything about wanting to get back together but she keeps making it clear that she wants to be friends. I have no problem with that but I also want to keep seeing her as a fb.

She has quite low self esteem but when she's had a drink she gets a lot of confidence and usually gets touchy-feely, or at least she did when we were together.
I should also mention she has bpd tendencies which tend to come out when she's drunk, not sure if that makes any difference in how I should approach this.

She's not the sort of person to talk about anything serious unless it's through txting on the phone. She's very immature like that so I can't just bring up the subject of us becoming fb as I'm sure she'd just giggle and say no way.

What sort of approach should I use?

Thanks.

 

[Mr. Bond]

You aren't going to like this reply, but why would you want to do that? You can fvck lots of other girls without the complications that arise from fvcking an ex. If you think that she's all you can get, you are wrong. You can absolutely find someone else.

 

[Neon Owl]

You aren't going to like this reply, but why would you want to do that? You can fvck lots of other girls without the complications that arise from fvcking an ex. If you think that she's all you can get, you are wrong. You can absolutely find someone else.

I'm fully aware of that mate. I actually have other girls available to me but I just want to keep seeing her for some reason.
I know I can get other girls no problem that's not an issue for me.

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

I should also mention she has bpd tendencies which tend to come out when she's drunk, not sure if that makes any difference in how I should approach this.

It does make a difference. Run like hell.

 

[Neon Owl]

It does make a difference. Run like hell.

lol no tips then?

I don't have any emotional attachment anymore I know her game well enough. If she goes off on a crazy streak again I'll just get a taxi home, I don't mind.

If I go in too hard i know she'll stop things and say we should just be friends. I'm thinking it would be best to just game her like a girl i've never met and escalate slowly by flirting with some light kino to begin with.

I probably won't even kiss her on the lips at first as that may put her guard up straight away.

Please guys can I get some real ideas about how I can go about this?

 

[Mr. Bond]

Well, I still don't recommend it. The fact that you still want to fvck her instead of focusing on other girls tells me you still have some sort of feelings you aren't admitting to yourself....

But that being said, if you really insist on fvcking her, don't bring it up in words. Don't bring up some serious talk. Just start doing it. That way it "just happened" in her mind. Later you can clarify that you don't want to get back together.

 

[Aristippus]

Let it be her idea that you both have sex. You NEVER verbalize the desire. You have to do things non-verbally that get her aroused without actually pushing for sex. Then what will happen is she will get so hot and bothered that she will jump you.

So start with touching. If the touching intensifies, then kissing. And kissing can easily lead to sex. Once you verbalize the desire, you kill the chances of it happening in most cases. This isn't something you should verbalize anyway. All progress is made through action. Action and emotion prevent her from jumping into the rational part of her brain and keep her in the emotional part.

 

[asa_don]

wow...all the women out there in the world that you can be fvcking and this guy resorts to going back to an old ex for some pvssy....very sad indeed.

 

[Aristippus]

I actually agree with everyone who says you shouldn't go back to exes. They are exes for a reason, but I felt like saying it again would be redundant. Consider this the disclaimer/warning. Try what I mentioned above at your own risk.

 

[Neon Owl]

Thanks for the replies fellas. Much appreciated.

Would it be a good idea to mention that I'm seeing other girls? She started seeing me as low value near the end so I'm thinking if I let her know I have other options it might help raise her attraction in me.

Should I talk about the relationship we had in the past tense or should I just act like it all never happened and I'm just gaming her all over again like we just met?
I'm thinking once I get her to lay against me when we're watching the movie it should be pretty easy from there. I know she'll be keeping her distance from the start and will not be cuddling up like she used to. I'm thinking once the movie starts I'll just pull her over and get comfortable. Once she's relaxed and we've done a good bit of flirting it shouldn't be too hard.

Tbh I think it'll all depend on how much she has to drink lol she becomes a different person when she's had a few.

Anyone else got any tips for me?

 

[Neon Owl]

Am I right in thinking she wouldn't agree for me to come over and have drinks if she didn't think something could happen?

I told her I'd come over late afternoon next week and we can get a takeaway and watch a movie. I'm guessing she knows what is going to end up happening or she wouldn't agree to it I mean she's not stupid, though she does like to play dumb like butter wouldn't melt in her mouth.

 

[Cremasta]

If you're going to go see her and aim for the fb status, you can go all out on this one.
In a previous life, I had an ex who I got back after two breakups, by the third one I'd had a gutful and made it permanent.

Fast forward six months, found this site and went back to see her with a whole new mindset. I didn't want a relationship with her anymore, I just wanted to see if I could get her kit off.

Enter Mr Super confident Cremasta, throwing out dumb lines like "So, what would you do if I just came over and kissed you right now?", "Make me a coffee." and "I really just want to see you naked again."

Fast forward another 10 minutes and her kit was off

 

[casaanova]

It depends on the circumstances: Who broke up with who? What was the reason for the breakup? And how often were you guys intimate during the relationship?

 

[Neon Owl]

It depends on the circumstances: Who broke up with who? What was the reason for the breakup? And how often were you guys intimate during the relationship?

I broke up with her because I found out she was still talking to guys on the dating site we met on. Since the breakup she's been trying to regain frame control by making it sound like she wants to get back with me, then when I hint at meeting up she says let's just be friends.
I had to work to get her to see me again. I fed her some bull**** about how it was just as much my fault for what happened...basically I had to absolve her of any blame to get her to want to see me again. She hates being in the wrong and would never have agreed to meet me if she thought I'd still have a grudge against her.

So now things are cool between us but she thinks she has frame control because i've been pushing to meet up again, even though she has always been the one to initiate contact every time since the split.

We were intimate every time I saw her which was nearly every weekend I would go stay at hers for a couple days. We'd have sex every night at least once but near the end she started to use sex as a way to control the relationship.

So what is your advice??

 

[Aristippus]

So what is your advice??

**Don't work so hard for it and if she tries to use sex as a means to control you, be willing to walk away. Otherwise, you need to just stop caring, do what you want to do, say what you want to say, without caring whether or not she likes it.

You can try saying one or two things that you think might cause her to back away. Either she will go for it or she won't but you could care less what her opinion is. "You know, I just realized something. I think this should be the last time we hang out. I only want women for one thing and I'd be no good for you.". Who cares whether she likes it or not? Then she will either jump you or she will back away. The thing is, when you say it, you keep your distance. If she cuddles up to you, you act like you enjoy it, but either she comes to you or she doesn't. Either way, you know where things stand without the b.s.

 

[Neon Owl]

So what is your advice??
You can try saying one or two things that you think might cause her to back away. Either she will go for it or she won't but you could care less what her opinion is. "You know, I just realized something. I think this should be the last time we hang out. I only want women for one thing and I'd be no good for you.". Who cares whether she likes it or not? Then she will either jump you or she will back away. The thing is, when you say it, you keep your distance. If she cuddles up to you, you act like you enjoy it, but either she comes to you or she doesn't. Either way, you know where things stand without the b.s.

That's a good idea I think I'll use that as a last resort if she puts up resistance to my advances. Thanks.

 

[Neon Owl]

Usually when I go round (when we were together) I'd walk into her flat and give her a kiss for a few seconds then sit next to her and talk for the next hour or 2. Then maybe we'd put a movie on and after a few minutes she'd turn and start cuddling up to me resting her head on my chest. I'd put my arm around her and she'd usually move it up to her breasts as she likes me paying attention to them.
Then we'd kiss randomly and have some foreplay and (depending on if her son is home) I'd end up fingering her pvssy and sucking on her breasts while watching the movie.
Then at the end of the night obviously move into the bedroom for sex...though sometimes she would be reluctant to do this and would just tell me to go to bed even though she told me she was tired and we'd just been fooling around. One trick I used to use was to tell her I'd give her a back rub which she loves.

So how do I change how I act this time to not scare her off straight away?

Should I even kiss her on the cheek at first? I don't want to do that is it's something only friends do and i don't want to frame myself like that straight away.
I'm thinking I should keep my distance at first without even hugging her when I see her and slowly move towards her and start very light kino throughout the first couple hours while being c&f.
Then when we start watching the movie if she doesn't end up getting close to me I'll just reach out and pull her onto me. Once she's on me it should be easy to escalate the kino to touching her breasts which is bound to get her worked up.
Then I'm thinking I might just say "I bet you'd love a good back rub right now wouldn't you" and if she agrees it'll be easy from there.

 

[DonGorgon]

only works if you dumped her first and she still wanted you ... if thats the case just pant a seed of possibility in her mind that she may have you one day (which she never will) and F her brains out and talk to her when she orgasms and say you will always F her.. as soon as she tells you she will always F you no matter what she is you sex provider for ever... I have two females in that position on my team now..

 

[Neon Owl]

I should also mention that her 2 bottom front teeth have just fallen out (she had a gum problem) so she's going to be very embarrassed about it until she gets it fixed lmao

How can I use this to my advantage? Should I make fun out of her when i see her or is that a bad idea as it might make her too self-conscious to kiss me and get intimate.

Her sister txtd me last night when she was round at hers and we were both making fun of her and she took it well and was laughing along.
I think she likes it when people are mean to her because that's what she seems to respond to (she's told me I might have been too nice to her and she wasn't used to it)...though at the same time if I'm trying to get sexual with her I don't want to make her self-conscious.

 

[Aristippus]

Don't make fun of a health problem or appearance issue related to it. That's off limits. No need to beat a person when they're down.