"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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How to respond to this flake

jay07

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1. Invited her on a trip this weekend last saturday.
2. She was very excited, said of course. Startex blowing me up all week.
3. Invited me out two times this week in which we met up for a few drinks.
4. Yesterday she acts distant, knew shed flake.
5. Today she tells me she cant go cause she has something else goin on saturday.

Havnt reaponded to her yet. Me and her have history, i needed a date so i asked her. Im upset she only gave me a days notice considering i could have asked someone else, my fault for not having a plan b. I will not be attending this trip now as my boys are bringing their girls, but i was wondering how to respond.

Was thinki g about either ignoring the text; or waiting a few hours and responding with "ok".

I would like for her to be a bootycall option in the future but if i have to cut ties for good to keep my pride then its w.e. what would you guys do.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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skinnyguy

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you're about to get 20+ responses about how you should go "no contact"
 

jay07

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No contact to the flake text is an option i considered but if she texts me later wanting to bang it out im gonna respond. I want her to be around as an option so thats where my curiosity cimes in. To respond or not to respond..

Were fwb but it aggravated me she waited a day before to tell me, even though i seen it coming last night
 

NewJack

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Here's a great thing to learn from this: realize how little control you actually have.

She knows how much she likes you. If she wants to reach out, she can.

You will NOT succeed at creating interest where none is, you will NOT succeed at fanning flames of desire by strange withdrawal moves. That is an ILLUSION.

What you do now doesn't even really matter. Her internal desire is going to determine the future of your relationship and there's nothing you can do about it.

How's that for male empowerment? lol. Sorry man. Im just trying to represent what I think is truth. Guys spin their wheels when their actual ability to influence things is just so pitifully small.
 

jay07

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I disagree. I can text her back "YOU STUPID SLVT!" and ill look like a desperate idiot. I can text her back "hey no problem its totally okay i understand!" And shell walk take me as a beta she can walk over. I can respond "k" and shell see im pissed off and it could go a few ways.

This is a chick ive known for a while. I want to get the point across she wasted my time and ruined my trip, without having to demonstrate it.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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jay07

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Why what? She disrespected me in the fact she had a week to flake and she waited til the last minute. I can find other things to do but next time i have the opportunity to lay her ill take it out in bed.
 

XY.

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jay07 said:
I want to get the point across she wasted my time and ruined my trip, without having to demonstrate it.
Why this
 

VikingKing

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Respond with indifference. Find a new one. If she comes around, try to **** her. Otherwise don't waste your time, it should be more valuable than that.
 

jay07

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Cause there was no apology in her flake. "oh i have this to do saturday i have to be there".

No apology. She proby dont care, and the fact weve been texting all week probably gave her ego a little boost she wanted. I want to pull that rug from right out under her. After 3 hours though i think im just gonna ignore it.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

Desdinova

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The only time you respond to a flake is when they counter-offer. When that happens, there's a higher chance that her excuse is legitimate. No counter-offer = no interest.
 

Solomon

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Desdinova said:
The only time you respond to a flake is when they counter-offer. When that happens, there's a higher chance that her excuse is legitimate. No counter-offer = no interest.
This

Although girls are catching on

"Hey I'm not feeling well today can we hang out another day"
Would you consider that a counter-offer dez, even though there is no time or place

:nervous:
 

nismo-4

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Drop her ass. Your princess is in another castle.

Case closed. Get out of my court.
 

Desdinova

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Solomon said:
This

Although girls are catching on



Would you consider that a counter-offer dez, even though there is no time or place

:nervous:
It doesn't hurt to pursue it. I've had women use that on me and then successfully meet up on the second attempt. I think some women get "cold feet" when it comes to a first date, but then go for it.

If she cancels the second attempt, then she should be dropped.
 

PlayHer Man

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I don't always drop flakes immediately. I've gotten some good sex from flakes.

What you should do now is raise the stakes. This means work LESS and make her work more.

No more "dates" from now on. She needs to come directly to your apartment/house or you cut her loose. Those are the terms you should follow now.

Next night you're free and have no plates to f*ck send her a text like:

YOU: Hey, free tonight?

If she says yes say:

YOU: Great. Come to my place for a movie.

If she rejects this offer THEN go NC. :up:
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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jay07

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Yea i aint gonna respond. Just weird she was all about it til last night. Caught me off guard. Oh well lol
 
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