"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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How to quit looking at the facebook/myspace of your oneitis?

lazikia

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Any tips? I think this is worse than following them around or bothering them in person (which I don't do) because it causes you to use your imagination to think more about how great they are rather than thinking about how great they are solely by seeing their actions in person.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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AlexTheGreat

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Proceed to lose the oneitis with a hammer shot to the computer. That will liberate much of your time to go out and meet people and stop being desperate. :)
 

New2Town

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Block them or just delete them off your friends list. It's as easy as that.
 

lazikia

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You can still look at their profile if they aren't on your friends list and if I blocked them I'd end up just unblocking them or creating a new profile to see their profile.
 

dannyegg4575

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not going to be easy, i'm doing the same thing sometimes.... just keep doing it if you want to slow down your recovery... but i'd suggest start going out and meeting other women... slowly but surely her image will dissipate like the cloud
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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dannyegg4575

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no need to break your computer. just cut the cord to your computer. You can't turn it on if you don't have power.

if you want to fix it later, it'll only cost you at most $10
 

Jitterbug

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Well, just check out the profiles of other hotties while you're on it.
 
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Been there too. It just takes a click on "search" and type in her username. And see all the new pics they have up. Just don't do it, have some willpower.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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PrinceBeavis

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Had the same problem with my oneitis....only with texting. It came own to one thing....Self Discipline.

Look, you're just going to have to STOP. You can do it. If you catch yourself starting to go there, yell at yourself to STOP......"NO!!!STOP-STOP-STOP!" It really IS as simple as that. As time goes on, it will only get easier, and you will only get stronger.
 

SunnyD

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If you haven't deleted them as friends yet...do it. If you are still able to see their profile because they are in your same network..then ask them to block you or make the profile private. Seriously. It will save you a lot of grief. I was at a point where I was sitting on his page all day and hitting refresh to see when new girls would leave msgs...how bad is that????? DON'T get like that.
 
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SunnyD said:
If you haven't deleted them as friends yet...do it. If you are still able to see their profile because they are in your same network..then ask them to block you or make the profile private. Seriously. It will save you a lot of grief. I was at a point where I was sitting on his page all day and hitting refresh to see when new girls would leave msgs...how bad is that????? DON'T get like that.

Haha, remind me to cheat on my next girlfriend so I get that treatment. :eek:
 

SunnyD

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My Name is Nobody said:
Haha, remind me to cheat on my next girlfriend so I get that treatment. :eek:
It was before he cheated...it's when I was suspecting...:p
 

Rebound Material

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I think I got lucky cuz my oneitis deleted her facebook and myspace just a little after she had moved...otherwise, I can see myself in this same situation....and yes, your imagination can really amplify how "great"(sarcasm) she is.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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The Deacon

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Prince Beavis said:
Had the same problem with my oneitis....only with texting. It came own to one thing....Self Discipline.
Ding, we go onto double jeopardy.

We can't really give you any tips to restrain yourself, because the simple fact of the matter is that you'll find a way to look at her profile no matter what.
 
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PrinceBeavis said:
Had the same problem with my oneitis....only with texting. It came own to one thing....Self Discipline.

Was she replying to your texts?
 

green69

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Well for one you can change your privacy settings to see less news from ______. That way when she posts on someones wall, changes her status or whatever it won't show up on your wall. The rest is just discipline, habit, and willpower.
 

PrinceBeavis

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The Deacon said:
Ding, we go onto double jeopardy.

We can't really give you any tips to restrain yourself, because the simple fact of the matter is that you'll find a way to look at her profile no matter what.
I'm sorry, I don't get your point.
 

PrinceBeavis

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My Name is Nobody said:
Was she replying to your texts?

Yes, she was. It was some weird "Texting-Land" area of the Friend Zone. But I kind of don't see how that matters. The bottom line, is that I extracted myself
from that pattern, and what it took was good, old fashioned, toughness. Just deleted that number from my phone (even if it took two or three times), quit looking at the screen every five minutes, and walked away.

It's just about will-power. Or am I missing something.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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