How to Proceed

[l__i__l]

Guys,

Looking for some advice on how to proceed.

I’ve been on three dates with a girl. No kissing or sexual intimacy in that time.

On date 3 I asked her if she was interested in a relationship, as that’s my intention.

She states she has just come out of an on-off long term relationship of 10 years with an ex 6 months ago and needs time for herself. She stresses that it has got nothing to do with me but is bad timing. She offers to be friends and wants to continue to hang out.

I can understand her position, but my gut says to move on as I don’t want to end up in the friend zone. Interestingly I came across this study which found less than 10% of couples started off as friends.

She seemed genuine in her response and really wanted to continue to hang out. She also has been really enthusiastic on our dates hanging around as late as possible.

How would you proceed?

 

[manfrombelow]

Guys,

Looking for some advice on how to proceed.

I’ve been on three dates with a girl. No kissing or sexual intimacy in that time.

1. Three dates without physical intimacy communicates that you lack game, and everything seduction & human psychology-related.

On date 3 I asked her if she was interested in a relationship, as that’s my intention.

2. You made two mistakes here: First, why the fvck did you have to ask her if she's interested in a relationship? It's too fvcking soon to discuss a relationship anyway. Dating should be fun and relaxing, and by asking this question, you killed all the fun. Secondly, by asking her this question, you came up as weak, needy, and desperate to her unconscious mind. Too long, didn't read: You dried up her pvsssy.

She states she has just come out of an on-off long term relationship of 10 years with an ex 6 months ago and needs time for herself. She stresses that it has got nothing to do with me but is bad timing.

3. BULL-FVCKING-SH~T all chicks say to weak beta guys who dry their pvssies up.

She offers to be friends and wants to continue to hang out.

4. DO YOU WANT TO BE HER "FRIEND"? Ask yourself this.

I can understand her position, but my gut says to move on as I don’t want to end up in the friend zone.

5. Finally some wise sh!t from you now.

Interestingly I came across this study which found less than 10% of couples started off as friends.

6. You don't need "science" to know this sh!t, buddy.

She seemed genuine in her response

7. Of course she did. She was genuinely turned off by you.

and really wanted to continue to hang out.

8. And continue having free meals and free companionship from a beta orbiter.

She also has been really enthusiastic on our dates hanging around as late as possible.

9. Only deem a chick "enthusiastic" if and when your d~ck is embraced by her mouth & tongue. Anything else is BULLSH!T.

How would you proceed?

10. Cut all contact with her immediately, and start hitting on other chicks.

 

[Mike32ct]

Unfortunately, she’s recruiting you to be the “friendzone guy” which is basically the “half boyfriend” or “fill in guy.” It’s essentially an “unpaid internship” of unspecified duration until she finds a “full time hire” boyfriend or “part time hire” FWB.

I’m not exaggerating at all. This will drag on for a long time; you’ll get more attached to her; it will feel like a relationship is inevitable; and you’ll be crushed when she finally tells you who she’s “dating” (ie sleeping with).

You must get out now while you still can.

I would just say, “I enjoy your company, but I’m not really looking for a friend. If you’re up for something more, give me a call. Take care.”

Then disappear completely.

 

[Murk]

You ruined it by not escalating to sex in those 3 dates, we've all been there. It's very hard to reframe once you've introduced yourself into her life like this. Easier to move on and do it properly next time (being sexual from the off).

 

[Am Shaegar]

She states she has just come out of an on-off long term relationship of 10 years with an ex 6 months ago and needs time for herself. She stresses that it has got nothing to do with me but is bad timing. She offers to be friends and wants to continue to hang out.

In todays world most women outside of a relationship keep riding the **** carousel until they find one big enough that it gets stuck. The fact that she isn't riding your **** at the moment, but spends time with you, is all the proof that you need that you are already deep in the friend zone.

 

[manfrombelow]

OP, tell her this before cutting all contact:

"I'm not interested in being your friend, honey. I had enough friends already. Let me know when you've changed your mind."

 

[RBK]

For the love of god never ask a girl about a relationship, that's their job not yours. You messed this all up.

Welcome to the friendzone.

 

[Bethatsocialguy]

Guys,

Looking for some advice on how to proceed.

I’ve been on three dates with a girl. No kissing or sexual intimacy in that time.

On date 3 I asked her if she was interested in a relationship, as that’s my intention.

She states she has just come out of an on-off long term relationship of 10 years with an ex 6 months ago and needs time for herself. She stresses that it has got nothing to do with me but is bad timing. She offers to be friends and wants to continue to hang out.

I can understand her position, but my gut says to move on as I don’t want to end up in the friend zone. Interestingly I came across this study which found less than 10% of couples started off as friends.

She seemed genuine in her response and really wanted to continue to hang out. She also has been really enthusiastic on our dates hanging around as late as possible.

How would you proceed?

It sounds like she was interested a little. You went on 3 dates and you didnt do anything. No progression on the dates. She either now thinks you're not confident enough or you're wanting something more serious than it is. She probably just wanted some fun to get away from relationship stress and you didn't provide it

 

[andreihaha]

OP, tell her this before cutting all contact:

"I'm not interested in being your friend, honey. I had enough friends already. Let me know when you've changed your mind."

Or just "I'm not interested in being your friend." Nothing more.
And then cut contact.

If she'll consider it(seems unlikely but possible), she'll let you know.
If not, you won't be hearing from her any more.
Win-win.

 

[The Duke]

OP, the vast majority of girls will want a relationship at some point. It's there job to bring that up. Your job is to build the connection that gets her there if that is what you want. When a guy asks for a relationship he is usually seen as weak/insecure in the eyes of the woman.

 

[MtmVaott]

If you go against your gut feeling she will eventually sense it and lose all respect that is left

 

[devilkingx2]

It's possible that the reason OP didn't get anywhere in 3 dates is that this girl was always planning to friendzone him.

 

[Mike32ct]

It's possible that the reason OP didn't get anywhere in 3 dates is that this girl was always planning to friendzone him.

Yup. Sometimes a chick just doesn’t give a guy any signs or any openings to make a move.

 

[bat soup]

Guys,

Looking for some advice on how to proceed.

I’ve been on three dates with a girl. No kissing or sexual intimacy in that time.

Dump that biiitch.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

She should be trying to get you in a relationship not the other way around.

You didn't escalate and now want to be her boyfriend before you even did anything with her.

That's not how it works bro. I hope you'll do a lot of reading on this site to learn because you are going to have a lot of issues following this path.