How to proceed after the 1st date? A bit mixed signals.

[guru1000]

Good Job Rick, in putting your ego aside.

Like I said some of my best women (last three LTRs) gave me the cheek and didn't reach out after the first date. There are no hard rules in asking for a second date EXCEPT that you desire to.

Although distinctions (<15%), anyone who has gone through enough numbers will tell you the same, and you should do exactly the same next time around if you desire to.

 

[Who Dares Win]

This is true. Women still want a man to lead but in today's dating world most women will make it super clear that they want to see you again.

Most women that I go out with for the first time message me shortly after I leave the date. They say things like "I had a great time and I hope we can do it again", etc.

It is not uncommon for a woman to even bring up an event that she will invite me to in the near future, immediately after the end of the date.

IMO if a woman does not reach out to you very soon after the 1st date has ended, its a bad sign.

I normally ask them to shoot me a quick text when they get home safe, especially if we were drinking. I can usually gauge their text in terms of interest level based on that text when she sends it.

Good idea, I'll add it to my routine of checks.

Most of the times its not the message itself but the timing and the lenght of it.

 

[The Duke]

Perhaps, but I was taught that cheek kisses were bad and to move on. It's not that I am protecting from rejection, as I was probably going to reach out anyway, I was just taken back a bit. I will reach out Tuesday or Wednesday and see if we can set something up.

Most of the time a cheek kiss isn't the best sign, however a kiss on the lips doesn't guarantee future success either!

None of this is black and white. There is no one size fits all situations. Keep pursuing if its what you want and she keeps complying to your request. Keep moving the ball down the field towards the goal(sex).

 

[RickTheToad]

Good idea, I'll add it to my routine of checks.

Most of the times its not the message itself but the timing and the lenght of it.

She texted me a few mins ago asking what I'm doing Saturday. I guess we may have a live one here.

 

[sazc]

IMO it never hurts to try. All things aren't equal. If YOU would be interested in seeing her again, ask. The worst she can do is reject, overtly or by ghost. If you're not already in the IDGAF headspace when you are rejected, keep reaching out until you are in the IDGAF headspace.

 

[Who Dares Win]

She texted me a few mins ago asking what I'm doing Saturday. I guess we may have a live one here.

Let us know how it evolves, Im not in the position to give you advices since Im a fast dropper but we can learn something out of it possibly.

 

[Mazer]

Typically if a woman doesnt message you after the date or early the next day its a bad sign.

Yes. 90% of women who message me after the first date always ends up in sex and as a long term plate. Women who do not initiate contact after first date usually leads to no sex, or waiting too long for sex and dissapear after three dates. Never fails.

 

[RickTheToad]

Boy, you guys are so positive here. Thanks. I feel like I am talking to some mgtows here are something.

 

[marmel75]

She texted me a few mins ago asking what I'm doing Saturday. I guess we may have a live one here.

Go out and see what happens. If its another cheek situation I would drop her myself on principal.

 

[RickTheToad]

Go out and see what happens. If its another cheek situation I would drop her myself on principal.

I wouldn't do a thing. Don't contact her again. The both cheeks thing tells me she has low interest......or wants to see if you will chase and how hard.

Don't chase her, see what happens

Edit: I see you didn't contact her, and she reached out. Like I figured.

Still do not like the cheek thing, but who knows. I will say, the last two ladies I did date and bed were similar, but also contacted me right after the 1st date ended. One even said, cause she reached out twice before I saw her again, you were going to ghost if I didn't contact you again because we didn't kiss. I said, yes, life's too short to play the guessing game at my age.

I don't chase, I throw the line out once, if she bites, great, if not, later. I was surprised that this one chased me for two weeks because either her schedule or mine was busy to meet up. But, we'll see.