"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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How to make she gets the feeling that you have standards? (High standards?)

Goosberry

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hello everyone, a quote from the thread "The Truth About Women"
Make sure she gets the feeling that you have standards and that you are judging her based on them. Ask her questions that show her you are checking her out to see if she is up to snuff. Women don't like to feel like you are with them only because you can't do any better. They prefer to feel like you have high standards; you can get any chick you want, but you chose HER because she is SOOOO special and SOOOO different from all the others. Yeah, I know.
How can I do that? I search about this topic then I've found that Mr.fingers was mentioned about this too. So we can make she know that we have the standards by telling her like this?
YOU: You are kinda hot...but you could never be my girlfriend.
HER: What? Why do you say that???
YOU: I only date nice girls and you have trouble written all over you.
HER: No I am nice! Really!
YOU: Right...sure.
HER: (Trying to convince you she is nice)

The above is just an example, instead of “nice” insert whatever quality you are looking for. You can even say the complete opposite, that she is too nice for you and what you really need is a bad girl! It doesn’t matter as long as you are giving her something to strive for. Set your standards and let her try to make the grade so she has to actually work for your affection.
First of all, I want to tell you that I love Mr.fingers, no doubt. But I'm just confused.So, I feel I got the confirmation by Senior DJ which actually agree with this advice. And then, he said..
Find out what she is looking for in a lover, then look at your life to see which of these qualities you possess. Try not to qualify yourself to her using adjectives to describe yourself (I am smart, funny, sensitive, etc), instead use stories and anecdotes of your life to convey these values indirectly.
Isn't it the way of trying to impress her? Which opposite with this quote.
As soon as she perceives that you are trying to prove yourself to her, she loses all interest.
And then I'm confused again now. Anyone help? How can you make she gets the feeling that you have standards? How would you do that?

p.s. I'm so sorry about my English, I only learnt it by translated pook's articles.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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The Duke

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Quality people have high standards. To get the point across that you have high standards, start asking questions that exhibit high standards.

-Ask her what her credit score is. People with high standards have high credit scores. Having a high credit score typically means you agreed to some certain terms and did what you said you would do for an extended period of time!

-Do a little detective work. See if they have any sort of criminal record. For instance driving while intoxicated, public lewdness, etc. Keep that information to yourself. At some point in time, prompt them to share that information. Don’t let them realize you know what you do. A person with high standards will be forthcoming. You shouldn’t have to dig for details.

-At some point, comb thru her social media. When you are done, tell her you went thru it to see what kind of person she was. She will know you aren’t messing around and have high expectations when you tell her what you have done. If you see something you don’t like, tell her. People with high standards don’t tolerate much drama.

The concern I have with you, is why are you worried about showing her you have high standards? She needs to impress you.
 

Serenity

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1. Have standards.
2. Live by the standards.
3. Act accordingly.

People with standards don't intentionally try to impress, that is a side effect of having standards which some find impressive. You keep your standards through acts when appropriate. It is appropriate when someone is getting close to or below your standards. Showing off unprovoked is awkward.
 

El Payaso

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By actually having standards.......
 

Goosberry

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Thank you everyone. It just simple as it own word, but i have no idea what it is haha. How idiot i am.
By actually having standards.......
This quote makes me even more realize about how I over analysis was.

Thank you very much
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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bigneil

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Whenever I walk up to a stripper who is on stage I will ask:

1) Do you have any tattoos?
2) Is that your real hair color?
3) Do you smoke?
4) (your qualifiers here)

It's amazing how it flips the script on them.
 

EmotionalGeek

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1. Say what you like
2. Say what you do not like
3. If she disrespects you then immediately say she has to respect you with bit of explanation.
 

marmel75

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Simply actually having high standards instead of pretending you have high standards is enough
 

Goosberry

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This definitely works ... when she tries especially-hard to convince you of her worth - that's also a sure sign of high IL.
Alright, just tell her something that you don't like about her? when'd you do that? when she give you high interesting level? Or when she ignore you? (Please forgive me, I know this is kind of stupid questions. I'm just curious about this)
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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