Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
ok first of all..I HATE THAT PHRASE...Spade said:lmao, bro wat if i hooked up with her on the first date?
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Just spend some time with her.Spade said:Aite bro i never thought of it that way... i guess ill work ma magic untill she brings it up.
Any ideas, how i can get really close with her?
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
lol. I will tell you from experience that was kinda epic fail. lol. Even tho the girl gave me my 1st kiss, we did not date.loleaglez1177 said:Like I said in the other thread, I still believe your rushing into things way too fast to be asking a girl to be your gf when you've only gone on one date so far.
But if you really wanna go for it (which i dont reccommend cuz i still think theres a shot she may deny you simply cuz she doesnt know you well enough, but hey if you really feel the attraction is there then go for it) heres what I would do:
Hang out with her one night, make sure the two of you are alone. When you feel the time is right (say at like the climax of wen u guys are hanging out, like a time wen you two just really connect), just tell her (maybe you could hold her hand too while you say it) "Hey bla blah I really enjoy being with you and I wanted to know if you would be my girlfriend"
^idk maybe someone can give a lil better advice, i mean how does that sound? Im not a huge expert when it comes to actually asking a girl out.