"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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How to let a girl down easily?

Peacebewithyou

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 24, 2012
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How do I let a girl down easily. There is this girl I have known for three years. I liked her on an off for the three years. She friended me explicitly this past September. With my natural temperment, I simply went my way and became very disinterested in her. Come late October, she was highly interested in me and until now she has some interest. We have hung out quite a bit since late October. Right now, we are on break from college. However, she takes too much of my mental energy, which I want back haha. How do I distance myself from her for now? How do I let her down easily?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Trailboss

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 21, 2012
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In a house
I'm no expert, by any means but: do the obvious. You are in control of your life are you not? If you want distance: take it. If she is smart, she will get the picture. If not...well...you will have to escalate the intention to verbalization of intent. That is, she will confront you at some point and you will have to state what you were trying to avoid. But that will be up to her, whether it is necessary to go that far.
 

pinkfl

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 11, 2012
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Tell her in person you want distance. Don't be a coward. If you have been any level of intimate with her and she thinks it is some sort of relationship just tell her to her face that she isn't what you are looking for. Then she will have closure and you don't have to worry about her constantly harassing you.
 
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