"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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How to handle?

flowtheory

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If a friend — man or woman — bailed on your plans at a fairly last minute, would you handle that situation the same as you would a plate bailing on you; silence and distance or would you overtly tell them this won’t fly?

Example: Had a hike planned with a guy friend this morning and was picking him up for 7am. It’s 6am now. During the night at 1:30am he messages me a long message saying he caught up with old friends and is now hammered, so he won’t be coming to hike. In the text he acknowledged it was a douche move.
I read it and was instantly annoyed at his behaviour.

And even though he bailed, I’m still going as it’s what I wanted to do, of course.

My objective: To become alpha in my life. Totally directed in every way; with women, friends, career, etc. Everything. To bleed out my beta ways.
Switching to red pill, alpha mentality and the way of the DJ requires a total transformation of perspectives and how one operates day-to-day. And this, is today’s challenge.

Question: I can’t stand when people bail, like anyone else. It lacks integrity and doesn’t align with my frame, or what I wish to surround or align myself with. How would you men handle people who bail or don’t align with your frame, even if it is a guy friend duh as this situation?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Serenity

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would you handle that situation the same as you would a plate bailing on you; silence and distance or would you overtly tell them this won’t fly?
Neither in a single incident, that's just reactive. If it's repeated I'll stop contacting them though. For a few incidents I'd just ignore it, do something else instead and try again later.

The main point is to NOT be bitter and react like your happiness depends on it. So you're doing it wrong if you're very annoyed by this. Although they don't align with your frame, you're guaranteed to lose your frame if you act all pissed about it.
 

Billtx49

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It’s not a big deal. He made a poor decision the night before. People sometimes do that. If it happens again though, start downgrading your future mental expectations of his friendship.
 
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Milano

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If its a rare thing and they apologize, I would think it sounds like a human being screwing up, something we all could do I guess. When it comes to dates, specially the first, if someone cancel and dont come up with the idea of a new date, they are gone in my book.
 

The Duke

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I stop asking people like that to join me. If I can't count on them to do what they say, I don't need them in my life. No sympathy from me.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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marmel75

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If people disrespect you and your time repeatedly you simply force them out of your life.

There is no "Alpha" and "Beta" in this. This is getting to be utterly ridiculous to see people toss around Alpha and Beta ways of reacting for every situation that occurs
 
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