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How to go on a date for free

El Roi

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In the context of looking for an LTR, how do you establish a chill atmosphere where it isn't a big deal that you don't pay? Most men are eager to pay for a woman on a date so many women expect it. Not paying breaks the mold.

It's really easy to respond with vague/abstract ideas that aren't actionable. Please talk specifics. Examples of how a situation like this progresses; certain ideas that are helpful to get across; actionable stuff.
 

SargeMaximus

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Try not going for a date but instead try to meet at her place from the start. That’s what I’ve done. Haven’t payed or been on a date in a few years not including when I was with my ex who I took on dates after a few months of banging like rabbits
 

El Roi

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Try not going for a date but instead try to meet at her place from the start.
Thanks for the reply, Sarge. Let's say you're just interacting with a girl for the first time. What has making those plans to hang at her house looked like? Like how has that conversation gone?
 

SargeMaximus

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Thanks for the reply, Sarge. Let's say you're just interacting with a girl for the first time. What has making those plans to hang at her house looked like? Like how has that conversation gone?
Pic attached. I eventually had to adjust my plans and she gave me a bj in my car. I fvcked her at her moms house a week later.

But that’s a perfect scenario. I normally start with direct and sexual or simply feel out how compliant she seems, then push for a meet at her place. If you have your own place, you can invite her there. You’d have more success than me. I’ve lost many girls who would have been down but they didnt have their own place.
 

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BackInTheGame78

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In the context of looking for an LTR, how do you establish a chill atmosphere where it isn't a big deal that you don't pay? Most men are eager to pay for a woman on a date so many women expect it. Not paying breaks the mold.

It's really easy to respond with vague/abstract ideas that aren't actionable. Please talk specifics. Examples of how a situation like this progresses; certain ideas that are helpful to get across; actionable stuff.
Go for a walk and talk and maybe some ice cream after...why are you trying to get out of paying? Are you a cheap ass?

There is a difference between not paying for a $150 dinner on a first date and not paying for $10 ice cream or $25 drinks.

One is justifiable and the other isn't. Don't take it to the extreme and be a cheap ass.

It's called etiquette and social tact. You are the one inviting her out, you should expect to pay. This is common sense but apparently it's lost on the younger generation.
 

SargeMaximus

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Go for a walk and talk and maybe some ice cream after...why are you trying to get out of paying? Are you a cheap ass?

There is a difference between not paying for a $150 dinner on a first date and not paying for $10 ice cream or $25 drinks.

One is justifiable and the other isn't. Don't take it to the extreme and be a cheap ass.
Whereas I say, why pay for her till she’s earned it
 

BackInTheGame78

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Whereas I say, why pay for her till she’s earned it
Again ..you at taking it to the extreme like so many tend to when they learn something new. It's like when people start working out think they should do it 7 days a week until they realize it works a lot better when you give your body time to rest and do it 3-5 days instead.

You also apparently don't understand social interactions very well...when you invite someone somewhere you should expect to pay. I can't help it if you have poor understanding of social interactions, by your own admission perhaps that is why you struggle with them outside of sales.
 

SargeMaximus

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Again ..you at taking it to the extreme like so many tend to when they learn something new. It's like when people start working out think they should do it 7 days a week until they realize it works a lot better when you give your body time to rest and do it 3-5 days instead.

You also apparently don't understand social interactions very well...when you invite someone somewhere you should expect to pay. I can't help it if you have poor understanding of social interactions, by your own admission perhaps that is why you struggle with them outside of sales.
Probably. But I also don’t have to since I can get laid using my own methods.
 

Bigpapa

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Probably. But I also don’t have to since I can get laid using my own methods.
i am curious about the quality of the girls though + your age

if you are around 20 , you can still get away with it … after 24 - 25 will be almost impossible, unless you are into trolls
 

BackInTheGame78

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i am curious about the quality of the girls though + your age

if you are around 20 , you can still get away with it … after 24 - 25 will be almost impossible, unless you are into trolls
Kind of my thoughts as well...I don't even know why someone would bother trying to save an insignificant amount of money that has potential to greatly limit their chances if only for that reason.

And if that amount of money is significant you are solving for the wrong problem.
 

Georgepithyou

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I go to starbucks, she orders coffee for her self and i order the starbucks water which is free. I do this for almost every single date since 2014.

I don't understand why some guys go out to expensive resturuants for a first date.
 

BackInTheGame78

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I go to starbucks, she orders coffee for her self and i order the starbucks water which is free. I do this for almost every single date since 2014.

I don't understand why some guys go out to expensive resturuants for a first date.
Me either. I rarely spend more than $25 and usually $10 or less. Most women will buy the next round if they are into you.
 

Bigpapa

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Kind of my thoughts as well...I don't even know why someone would bother trying to save an insignificant amount of money that has potential to greatly limit their chances if only for that reason.

And if that amount of money is significant you are solving for the wrong problem.
things that guy tend to forget or go to extremes

women cost money , directly or indirectly
 

Bigpapa

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I go to starbucks, she orders coffee for her self and i order the starbucks water which is free. I do this for almost every single date since 2014.
Man , no offense , but why would you go to a Starbucks to drink the free water ?

for sure you will give out that you are a cheap vibes to the girl :)
 

SargeMaximus

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If you are happy with the quality of the results then keep doing it. You seemed to indicate that wasn't the case in other threads, or maybe I was mistaken.
I do want to get hotter girls of course, and I have been on proper “drinks” dates in the past. My main issue is you just point out I suck at social skills but don’t offer a useful solution here. Weren’t you the one telling me my brain is just not wired for social skills? So then why tease me with saying I can improve when you believe I can’t? That’s troll behaviour
 

Georgepithyou

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Man , no offense , but why would you go to a Starbucks to drink the free water ?

for sure you will give out that you are a cheap vibes to the girl :)
No woman has ever had a negative reaction to it, it's actually a good conversation topic as well. The water even comes in the special starbucks cup.

Don't knock it until you try it.
 
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