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How to get rid of an obsessed girl?

squirrels

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Well...I took your advice...kept seeing her casually. It's maybe a month and a half in and she is already professing undying love to me, creating fake accounts on PoF to stalk me and see if I'm talking to other girls, and trying to smother me with affection hoping to "fix" me.

FAIL! :mad:
 

thedude4242

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I had a girl who liked me for years. then I started calling her all the time and calling her a bunch of times if she didnt answer. I no longer have a problem with her.
 

Stagger Lee

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thedude4242 said:
I had a girl who liked me for years. then I started calling her all the time and calling her a bunch of times if she didnt answer. I no longer have a problem with her.
That was what I suggested to squirrels, to go AFC on her since he wanted her to break it off instead of him having to do it. Instead it seems he acted like a DJ with her. What do expect?
 

Slickster

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Aww squirrels you love it!

Having girls obsess over you is part of the package when you signed up.

I had a friend last summer who had 3 women all vying for him pretty hard. He was letting himself get super stressed about it all until I talked him down. Here is basically what I told him:

Take a look at the big picture. You are young, in demand, and have women lining up to get a piece of you. The more the better. You are in the "zone". The place every guy wants to be.

Don't worry and stress over relationships, or hurt feelings. Just go with the flow and have fun. You are all adults and shouldn't take yourselves or any of this stuff too seriously.

Years from now when you are old and shrivelled you will look back at this moment and wish you stayed in that "pocket" as long as possible. Now is your time.


Now squirrels, go find a couple more and let's get this sh!t storm really fired up!
 

squirrels

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Slickster said:
Aww squirrels you love it!

Having girls obsess over you is part of the package when you signed up.

I had a friend last summer who had 3 women all vying for him pretty hard. He was letting himself get super stressed about it all until I talked him down. Here is basically what I told him:

Take a look at the big picture. You are young, in demand, and have women lining up to get a piece of you. The more the better. You are in the "zone". The place every guy wants to be.

Don't worry and stress over relationships, or hurt feelings. Just go with the flow and have fun. You are all adults and shouldn't take yourselves or any of this stuff too seriously.

Years from now when you are old and shrivelled you will look back at this moment and wish you stayed in that "pocket" as long as possible. Now is your time.


Now squirrels, go find a couple more and let's get this sh!t storm really fired up!
That'd be fine if she was sane. She's not.

I'm not loving this. What's more, I now can't trust any girls I meet on PoF, because they could be her under a fake account. So this is a big problem.

Here's the thing...she's not in love with ME. She's in love with her idea of what I am...and she believes the reason I'm not the person SHE wants is because I'm somehow "broken". She thinks if she smothers me with love and affection, she can somehow "fix" me and I'll become the person she believes I am deep down inside.

But she's NEVER gotten to know me. I know, because I've tried to talk to her before...she blows it off as all part of my "condition". :p

What really scared me is that she wanted me to f**k her without a condom last night...I know she's on BC, but I'm afraid she could "miss" and end up trapping me. She says she's not doing that...but I just don't trust her any more.

Everything she's doing seems to have an angle, and I even think her affection isn't a result of her liking ME, but her liking the idea of being with someone, and being smitten with me and thinking that I can be that guy to her...or that I WANT to be that guy to her.

You say I "love it"...I really don't. I'm tired of this. Women my own age...they can't grow into a relationship. They're all desperate and against the clock to fulfill their Prince Charming fantasies. You can't even DATE them because they all catch one-itis after three or four dates. They're on a timetable and they refuse to take NO for an answer...and when you stand firm they think there's "something wrong with you", because they can't see how any man who's not married at 32 wouldn't WANT to dive head-first into a pit of emotional commitment.

She literally believes she's here on this world to "save" me. :nervous:

I don't need to be "saved".

I just am blown away by people sometimes. They honestly think that romantic "love" is THAT important that EVERYONE ought to crave it. I guess it's what they've been told by Hollywood and Disney since the early days.
 

Scaramouche

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Dear Squirrels,
The basic problem is that you are a bit close minded on a few things....Just as Sir Hugh Dowding believed in his Fairies,and Crookes believed he materialised a living creature from the ether, I also believe that something incredible happened at Roswell in 1947...There was a crash there,the remains were removed by the USAF and probably subsequently taken to area 51...The Stealth was back-engineered from that craft....There probably were remains of some living creature there too...The propulsion system seems Anti-Matter........"There is more in Heaven and Earth than is dreamt of in your Philosophy Horatio...."
 

Slickster

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squirrels said:
That'd be fine if she was sane. She's not.

I'm not loving this. What's more, I now can't trust any girls I meet on PoF, because they could be her under a fake account. So this is a big problem.

Here's the thing...she's not in love with ME. She's in love with her idea of what I am...and she believes the reason I'm not the person SHE wants is because I'm somehow "broken". She thinks if she smothers me with love and affection, she can somehow "fix" me and I'll become the person she believes I am deep down inside.

But she's NEVER gotten to know me. I know, because I've tried to talk to her before...she blows it off as all part of my "condition". :p

What really scared me is that she wanted me to f**k her without a condom last night...I know she's on BC, but I'm afraid she could "miss" and end up trapping me. She says she's not doing that...but I just don't trust her any more.

Everything she's doing seems to have an angle, and I even think her affection isn't a result of her liking ME, but her liking the idea of being with someone, and being smitten with me and thinking that I can be that guy to her...or that I WANT to be that guy to her.

You say I "love it"...I really don't. I'm tired of this. Women my own age...they can't grow into a relationship. They're all desperate and against the clock to fulfill their Prince Charming fantasies. You can't even DATE them because they all catch one-itis after three or four dates. They're on a timetable and they refuse to take NO for an answer...and when you stand firm they think there's "something wrong with you", because they can't see how any man who's not married at 32 wouldn't WANT to dive head-first into a pit of emotional commitment.

She literally believes she's here on this world to "save" me. :nervous:

I don't need to be "saved".

I just am blown away by people sometimes. They honestly think that romantic "love" is THAT important that EVERYONE ought to crave it. I guess it's what they've been told by Hollywood and Disney since the early days.
If you really wanted to get rid of her you would. I think this one is gettin to you a bit squirrels.
 

Die Hard

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I dunno why, but somehow I missed this thread completely. So I just read all through it... Give us an update!
 

squirrels

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Die Hard said:
I dunno why, but somehow I missed this thread completely. So I just read all through it... Give us an update!
There's nothing to be said. She's still in love with me, and I really am not seeing anyone else right now.

I don't know what to do, man. This game...people think they can own it, that they can control it...it chews you up and spits you out. And soon you start wondering WHY...why you're bothering with attracting women. What do we gain from this? Why are we doing it?

Everyone has their own drug of choice. For the VAST majority of people, it's oxytocin. (not to be confused with oxyCONTin) It's that natural high we get from having sexual relations and from pair-bonding.

We're hard-wired for it. Our susceptibility to intoxication and addiction to our body's own natural chemicals is what has kept mankind reproducing for such a long time, and what has drove men to go to such lengths, create such an awe-inspiring world, all in the name of women. It's amazing how far you can go when your next "fix" is motivating you.

It disgusts me...it really does. And I don't know why that is...I think I've just wired myself over time to reject it out-of-hand. This "game" has BECOME my life...and I just keep driving myself. My drug of choice is adrenaline...I keep pushing myself. I don't feel right on oxytocin, or endorphins, or serotonin...it's all a mess to me.

I keep seeking clarity...and it BOTHERS me that I'm slowly becoming a victim of my humanity. Romance, to me, means being sucked down into the void.

I have to laugh and cry at the same time...I hear this girl's stories, about how nearly every guy friend she has or has ever had has just been another chump hoping to get into her panties. All of them. It's revolting. It's like...wow...is that what "we men" are?? A sick desperation for p*ssy? F*cking wow. I'm blown away.

How can anyone grow up exposed to that CONSTANTLY and ever hope to turn out normal?? It's nothing short of MIRACULOUS that this girl is as sane as she IS. Dragged into the "party lifestyle" by horny guys who just want to scramble her mind enough to get into her pants...constantly led on and betrayed by "friends" who are waiting "their turn", even FORCED against her will in some cases by men who were too worthless to even control themselves...pretty much animals and filth.

I don't understand my gender. These people are what society calls "men"?? No wonder people are misogynists.

I don't know if she's ever seen a man who can just honestly say, "This is who I am, I know I'm awesome, and I'm offering you a good time. You can take it or leave it." before she met me. It's no small wonder she's "obsessed". ANd I know that sounds arrogant, but I'm convinced that most people in this world are just filthy apes.

Sh*t, I wish a meteor would crash into this rock and end us all. It'd be doing the universe a favor. If she's right in her little conspiracy world and aliens share the same genetics as us...then God help us all. God f**king help us.

I know sooner or later I'm going to have to embrace my humanity and watch as it destroys me, like every other before me. I just wish there was something more noble to live for.

She is a constant reminder to me that I am no better than the disgusting human filth I see around me every day.

God damn it.

</rant>
 

Johnnyventana

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I think you have bought into her line of thinking. That she is who she is, because of men. That none of her actions are her responsibility. It's no different than her gas-lighting of you that you have "issues" that only she can fix.

She's slowly breaking you down.

You want to get rid of her? Close out your POF account and profess your undying love. She'll be gone soon enough.
 
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squirrels

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Johnnyventana said:
I think you have bought into her line of thinking. That she is who she is, because of men. That none of her actions are her responsibility. It's no different than her gas-lighting of you that you have "issues" that only she can fix.

She's slowly breaking you down.

You want to get rid of her? Close out your POF account and profess your undying love. She'll be gone soon enough.
Haha yeah, it doesn't work QUITE like that. And I just don't have it in me to "go chump".

You're right that her life is her responsibility...I'm not absolving her of that. In fact, I've talked to her before about putting herself in bad situations. But I DO see how attractive women get into this situation. After a while, you start to think it's NORMAL. I mean, you have a dozen guys that openly express their desire to f**k you. Then you look for someone you can trust to talk to, and you find some guys who are more than willing to lend you an ear and be your "friend", then suddenly you find out THEY want to f**k you. So you try to put your trust in your female friends, and then when you hang out with their husbands and boyfriends, you find out that THEY want to f**k you...or at least lure you into a three-way f**k with their wives/girlfriends. (not to mention that the girls start to resent you because of how their boyfriends react to you).

If this goes on long enough, you start to believe that this is just the way it's SUPPOSED to be, that it's NORMAL for guys to want to f**k you and for girls to hate you because their guys want to f**k you.

I mean, if you're a woman, the obvious answer is to distance yourself from all of these desperate chumps, but when every guy you meet turns into a desperate chump, what do you do? Just shut EVERYONE out??

And you wonder why the hot women you meet turn out to be snotty b!tches...they always seem cold to you. Because if they're nice AT ALL, guys think they "have a chance". You can't just giggle and say "no", because everyone on this forum knows that guys see that kind of "no" as a "not right now...try again later". You have to tell them basically to "f**k off", and then they cop the attitude..."what a b!tch!!"

This girl is too nice to have developed a b!tch-shield, and she pays for that every day by having to deal with desperate chumps 24/7. She's not even THAT hot, but she's hot ENOUGH that her lack of a b!tch-shield makes guys throw themselves at her and girls hate her just for being sexy. When you're a sexy girl, NOT being a b!tch is seen as being "flirty" or "teasing".

Honestly...it's refreshing to see a girl who's sexy, but still hasn't become an outright b!tch. I don't want her to change in that regard. But I'm like...how can I go to meet her friends, knowing that in their narrow, hormonally distorted minds, I'm the only thing standing between them and her p*ssy?? I'm not looking to beat asses. And that's why hot girls are so often seen with violent douchebags with assault charges...because every frustrated CHUMP with descended balls wants to take a shot at the girl and the only way she can avoid being a TOTAL b!tch is to have some tough guy standing in front of her ready to beat some asses.

This case should put more of an onus on YOU guys to be confident, upright, masculine men. You think the AFC-approach to dating and romance doesn't hurt anyone...but MOST of the problems you b!tch about with modern women are the results of defense mechanisms they build to cope with sneaky, passive-aggressive beta-males trying to beg, borrow, or steal their way into girls' panties. If MEN were MEN, then WOMEN could be WOMEN. Instead, "men" have to be little b!tches and "women" have to be ignorant, flakey, bipolar b!tches.

The "Don Juan lifestyle" isn't about getting women to like you or about getting laid. It's about restoring the MASCULINE way of life. It's about MEN being MEN so WOMEN can be WOMEN. If HALF of us could do that, then we would get laid NATURALLY and we wouldn't NEED a damned forum.

This is all a result of:
- Crummy romance movies designed not to tell the truth, but absorb you in an emotional BS story
- Advertising using sexual imagery and ideas to sell every damned thing and convincing a generation of under-parented kids that "sex is the best thing in the world"
- A victim-mentality and a society that rewards people for not taking responsibility for their lives...rewards them for giving more power to governments and institutions to "help" them instead of taking responsibility fo themselves

Sex is dumb. I spent all yesterday morning f**king this girl. My d*ck was sore by the end of it. I dunno why I do it...it's just something my body is wired to do. I tell her I'm done, no more today, and she wants to keep f*cking, and once she gets her lips on my d*ck I'm not gonna say no. But it's dumb. It's fun, yes...but it's dumb.

And I laugh...I laugh because there are probably a hundred guys still patiently waiting for their chance at this girl, and here I am, able to get into her pants on a second date, just by being a MAN. Not necessarily an extraordinary MAN, but a MAN nonetheless. But then ANYONE being a "MAN" is extraordinary in today's postmodern western society.

Someone posted a quote recently that's been attributed to a couple of authors, including Aldous Huxley: "An intellectual is a person who has discovered something more interesting than sex."

That's probably THE most true thing I've heard in a very long time. Sure, sex is fun. But the extraordinary and dramatic importance that these "boys posing as men" attribute to it is laughable at the very best and pathetic/pitiable at the very worst. And women...yeesh, don't get me started.

Just...wow. I'm starting to realize how many of guys' problems on this website are CREATED and could be pretty much SOLVED by them "getting a life" and finding something to think about besides how to get into women's panties.

That's why when you meet a "natural" and act fascinated by the ease at which he attracts women, he blows it off as "nothing really". To him, that's all it IS. And you have NO IDEA how refreshing it is to a woman to find a man who can just have FUN with the whole dating game/attraction cycle, instead of being all hung-up and tense and serious about "succeeding with her" and "not blowing his chances".
 

zekko

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squirrels said:
But I DO see how attractive women get into this situation. After a while, you start to think it's NORMAL. I mean, you have a dozen guys that openly express their desire to f**k you. Then you look for someone you can trust to talk to, and you find some guys who are more than willing to lend you an ear and be your "friend", then suddenly you find out THEY want to f**k you. So you try to put your trust in your female friends, and then when you hang out with their husbands and boyfriends, you find out that THEY want to f**k you...or at least lure you into a three-way f**k with their wives/girlfriends. (not to mention that the girls start to resent you because of how their boyfriends react to you).
Lol, that's pretty funny, but probably a pretty accurate assessment. There has to be worse things in the world than everybody finding you sexually attractive, though. Look how many hot girls get addicted to it. But I do see where it can cause problems with other girls.

squirrels said:
I mean, if you're a woman, the obvious answer is to distance yourself from all of these desperate chumps, but when every guy you meet turns into a desperate chump, what do you do? Just shut EVERYONE out??
Of course, then she meets a guy who isn't a desperate chump, and surprise, he wants to fvck her, too. What's a girl to do?

This kind of reminds me of the old 60s movie Candy, where everybody this girl runs into wants to have sex with her.
And to a lesser extent, There's Something About Mary, where every guy she meets is secretly in love with her. Funny stuff.

squirrels said:
The "Don Juan lifestyle" isn't about getting women to like you or about getting laid. It's about restoring the MASCULINE way of life. It's about MEN being MEN so WOMEN can be WOMEN. If HALF of us could do that, then we would get laid NATURALLY and we wouldn't NEED a damned forum.

This is all a result of:
- Crummy romance movies designed not to tell the truth, but absorb you in an emotional BS story
- Advertising using sexual imagery and ideas to sell every damned thing and convincing a generation of under-parented kids that "sex is the best thing in the world"
I agree sex isn't the big, great, all encompassing thing that it's packaged out to be. It's pretty overrated in modern society.

I don't think all the problems between the sexes are created by the media, though. I bet there were a lot of guys back in the old west, before they had movies, making some pretty awkward approaches toward attractive women. I bet more than a few made AFCs of themselves, too. There have always been betas.

squirrels said:
And you have NO IDEA how refreshing it is to a woman to find a man who can just have FUN with the whole dating game/attraction cycle, instead of being all hung-up and tense and serious about "succeeding with her" and "not blowing his chances".
I think this is what women mean when they say "Be yourself". They just want you to relax and be yourself, instead of getting all tense and stressed out, like you say. Relax and have fun with it.

When you get all nervous, it shows you're putting too much importance on the interaction, which makes you look desperate and lower value, and shows that you're putting her on a pedestal.
 

Die Hard

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Ugh, it's the middle of the night, I just got home from a party and want to sleep. So forgive me if my post isn't that structured, if my explanations aren't that clear or if my sentences aren't that well put.


Look, there's your intellect, your emotions and your instinct. Intellect and emotions get into conflict many times, they are of the same value: sometimes you listen to your emotions, sometimes you listen to your intellect.

Instinct, however, is always above those two. When your intellect or emotions go against your instinct, they are going outside their jurisdiction, so to speak.

Your intellect can get to a point where it thinks it can function independently from your instinct. That's a misconception, however. The intellect is there to serve the instinct, it should not try to become independant of the instinct and act on it's own. It has no ''own way'', all it can do is to serve the instinct. After all, how is the intellect supposed to make decisions independently from the instinct? The instinct provides the intellect with criteria on which the intellect can base it's decisions.

If the intellect was totally independent, it would not know what decisions to make. Is pain good or bad? Objectively, it's none of both. Your instinct tells you it's bad, and so you try to avoid painful situations, your intellect makes decisions that serve this purpose. If the intellect was disconnected from the instinct, it would not know whether to avoid pain or not, it would get caught up in some sort of deadlock of indecisiveness... ABOUT EVERYTHING. Every single decision you make in your life, is based upon serving the instinct. The instinct provides the intellect the criteria on which it bases it's decisions. Without these criteria, the intellect would be totally paralysed, incapable of making any decision because it would have no criteria to base it's decisions on.

Just as it is nonsense to think about the possibility of "loving pain'' (you cannot love pain. It will never feel good, no matter how much you want it to feel good, you can't change this.), it is nonsense to think about the possibility of "not liking sex". Human instinct tries to seek pleasure and try to avoid pain. No way you can change that, no use to think about the possibility. Human beings try to get sex and try to avoid sex deprivation. No way you can change that either, and no use to think about the possibility either.

I'll tell you why the sex drive disgusts you. It's because you feel like you''re a slave to it. Well guess what, you are a slave to your instinct and this is just one of many manifestations. Why don't you get disgusted by the idea that a razor cutting through your skin causes you pain? You're a slave in that regard too! You have to always avoid painful situations! You can''t cross the street if cars are passing by, coz it will get you hurt. Oh, what a bummer! You can''t do what you want, you can''t cross the street. You're a slave to your instinct that tells you to avoid getting hurt. DIGUSTING ISN'T IT?!?!

Don't you see how ridiculous that is? So why are you disgusted by the idea that you have a sex drive which you have to follow? (or else you'll feel bad). It's nothing different from follwing the drive to ''not get hurt'', or the drive to get nutrition in your body (Jesus, how disgusting! We have to put food in our bodies 3 times a day, otherwise we'll feel bad! We're all slaves to our "need for food''!! Let's write endless posts about how disgusting this is and how bothered we are by it! :))

The reason you feel bad about this particular manifestation of your instinct, and not those others, has to do with the way your mommy treated you as a child. I suspect you've learned to control your feelings/desires as a child, coz mommy would hurt your feelings/desires if you let them flow freely. You don't want to be ''dependent'' of a girl, coz you've learned as a child that being dependent will get you hurt. You're projecting your experiences with mommy onto the women you are dealing with now.

It's not bad to be a slave to your sex drive, just as it is not bad to be a slave to your drive for food. You just feel like it's bad to be a slave to your sex drive, because your subconscious has set a rule for you when you were a kid: do not become dependant of mommy! Whatever you want from her, do not become dependent of it! Coz this will get you hurt! Now you long for other women and want things from them, just liek you did with mommy as a child. So the subconscious starts nagging: "Hey Squirrels, wtf are you doing? don't become dependent of what you want from women, it''s the same as in the past, when you wanted things from mommy and ended up getting hurt!'' So you feel uncomfortable with this idea that you need something from women, that your whole life is almost based upon this need!.

Again, this need is not bad. Just as the need for food isn't bad. It's simply your subconscious and your childhood experiences trying to dominate your thoughts and behavior. Pretty understandable, but they are going against the instinct and like I said: Instinct is King, intellect nor emotions can overrule it!

So instead of going against your instinct, you need to get rid of this subconscious mechanism which is constantly convincing you that it''s disgusting to be a slave to your sex drive. How to do that? Fvck man, no easy answer. Go back to the core, get access to the pain you've experienced as a kid, re-live it and dissolve it.

That's what I meant with ''allowing yourself to be weak''. Re-living feelings of intense pain and helplessness from your childhood. They're buried inside of you, rotting and festering inside of you, paralyzing your thoughts and behavior from the inside, messing you up!

Most problems men have with women, are due to prblems they had with mommy as a child. Most of us just don't want to know and acknowledge this, coz it is too painful. We'd rather tell ourselves that''s all Freudian bullsh!t and convince ourselves that we are now strong, independent MEN. Truth is, the little helpless boy we once were, is still inside of us and we should acknowledge that boy, instead of burying him deeper away inside of us. Coz no matter how deep you bury him, he will not dissapear and he will keep causing great unrest from deep inside of you, until you deal with him and the negative experiences from your childhood.

The storm inside of you is caused by your childhood experiences, Squirrels. Gain access to them, gain acces to negative childhood experiences and the associated negative feelings. Let it all out, experience it, deal with it and eventually dissolve it. They are causing major unrest, setting your intellect up against your instinct etc. Your system is a mess. There's supposed to be harmony between your consciousness and subconsciousness, harmony between your intellect, emotions and instinct. Etcetera, etcetera. But you are totally out of sync, it's all out of balance.

If there's a tiny, little piece of rock inside your sock, you can put the most comfortable shoe in the world around your foot, but you'll still walk uncomfortable. No matter what you do on the surface, what kind of super soft texture the shoe is made of and how much Nika Air technology is integrated into the shoe's sole etc. etc. As long as you don't get to the core, which means removing all everything on the outside, the shoe and the sock...and get that piece of rock out, you will not solve the painful feeling that you experience while walking.

Just as well, you can do whatever you want: refine your thought processes, your ideas, your phillosophies, fvck hundreds of women, reject hundreds of women, do this, do that, whatever... As long as you don't get to the core of your problems, the sh!tstorm inside of you will keep blowing.
 

squirrels

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Yes, we all instinctively have fear, but it is precisely when we learn to control and conquer those fears that we become "great" as a species and a civilization. I'm sure, instinctively, Neil and Buzz felt a lot safer right on terra-firma than they did strapped to that rocket. Ships are safe in harbor...but that's not what ships are for. To argue that all reason and feeling are hopelessly enslaved to instinct is to argue against the existence of human courage, human thirst for understanding, human thirst for power. In fact, these forces THEMSELVES are "instinct"...the best and brightest part of our instinct.

Our generation has LOST itself to the idea that, "It's only natural to chase p*ssy, so it's perfectly acceptable for you to ignore reason, courage, and emotion and throw your past, present, and future to the winds in pursuit of it". This idea defines us as a people, and is the reason WHY we have websites devoted to reclaiming the masculinity, all that is good about us as MEN.

In the pursuit of ass, you find, ironically, that "ass" pursues those who rise above it. You're right to invoke parents...because women get the "gina tingle" from men who remind them of their fathers...men who had standards, who created a world and stood firm in it and defined their daughters' existences by it. Not all of these "AFC" boys running around, tongues wagging hoping for a taste of what's between women's legs, justifying their mindless, soulless baseness by saying, "Hey, I'm just a slave to my nature". Would daddy have ever said that??

Certainly, sexuality and other instincts are the "engine" of action in mankind. But untamed by the greater human spirit, left to their own devices, they're merely a cosmic biochemistry experiment, the organisms acting chaotically to whatever end the chemical processes drive them.

There are SO many things in life that are better to be passionate about than some gooey meat-flaps between some girl's legs. In the face of ALL the experiences, all the adventures, all the creation that life has to offer...how WASTEFUL is it for a man to put ALL of his worldly effort into the singular goal of holding the affection of a woman? To the detriment of his career, his passions, his friendships, his character and good name...why will he let go of all his manly virtue in pursuit of a vague shimmer?

Is it NORMAL in today's society to abandon all for a chance to enslave oneself to one's sexuality? Of course it's normal...otherwise Paris Hilton wouldn't be a celebrity, Sarah Palin wouldn't have a political career, and no one would know or care who Casey Anthony was. But that doesn't make it RIGHT, god damn it.

THAT is why I have such a love-hate relationship with my own sexuality...because as I try to fight the temptation to surrender to it and let it take me to my "natural conclusion", I am surrounded by lesser men telling me, "Give in! 'tis only natural! Be weak!"

And yes, the weakness runs in my blood as well. Isildur couldn't resist the Ring...how can I? Why SHOULD I? I should claim it for my own...it's only natural.

I'll not fall victim to the Faustian dilemma and accept my instincts under the false belief that there is no better destiny man can achieve than one of temptation and failure. It scares the p!ss out of me...that's what I'm always babbling about. I see people around me who heed your advice and "be weak" and give into instinct and fall apart, one after the other.

Their eyes cast down...and fixed upon the ground.
I'll keep my eyes fixed on the sun.
 

Slickster

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squirrels said:
I don't understand my gender. These people are what society calls "men"?? No wonder people are misogynists.

I don't know if she's ever seen a man who can just honestly say, "This is who I am, I know I'm awesome, and I'm offering you a good time. You can take it or leave it." before she met me. It's no small wonder she's "obsessed". ANd I know that sounds arrogant, but I'm convinced that most people in this world are just filthy apes.
I believe that most men are pretty much filthy apes too. In my opinion the entire purpose of this website is to become a better man and place yourself above the common ape. That's why I come here anyway.

Sadly I think this forum seems to have turned into an ape colony sometimes. Too many guys place too much value on pvssy. At times it seems like they are willing to sell THEMSELVES out just to get it. It is as you say, DISGUSTING.



squirrels said:
Just...wow. I'm starting to realize how many of guys' problems on this website are CREATED and could be pretty much SOLVED by them "getting a life" and finding something to think about besides how to get into women's panties.
100% TRUE!!!! Getting a fvcking life is pretty much the only thing a guy (budding DJ) needs to do.

Also stop blaming the other gender for your problems with women. As you say most of this crap is self created. Whenever I hear a guy b!tching about women I know he's still a struggling ape and has more work to do on himself.

Squirrels, I sense change in you. Keep going!!
 

Die Hard

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Meh, you're still attaching different meanings to my idea of ''being weak''. You've been doing that more than once now... Going back to your youth, connecting to the sh!t buried inside of you, is what I mean. Giving in to your sex instinct could be named as ''being weak'' also, but that's not what I'm aiming at when I talk about ''being weak''.

It seems some part of you just WANTS to misinterpret. Why that is, I leave for you to find out... Defense mechanism?


Anyway, speak to ya soon. Got too much chaos in my own life and mind to delve deeper into all these musings, at the moment.
 

Kailex

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squirrels said:
I'm not loving this. What's more, I now can't trust any girls I meet on PoF, because they could be her under a fake account. So this is a big problem.
You want to get rid of her.
What's the problem?

You would be so lucky if it WAS her under a fake account.
Then maybe she'd truly take a hint.
 

squirrels

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You know, I've warmed up to the idea of having a "steady girl"...and honestly, she would make a great "starter girlfriend"...a girl I could date for a year just to get used to the idea of "being with someone".

The problem is...well...she's just not SPECIAL to me in any way. She does everything a "good girlfriend" should do, but she doesn't really impress me/enrich my life in the day-to-day aspect.

In that regard...yeah, I could see dating her exclusively for a little while, but at 32yo, I'm starting to debate whether a "starter relationship" is something I even want to get into. And she's pushing 36 and been in a few...she has no need for a "starter". She's looking at this as "the one".

There's just a ton of hassles along with it as well. Her description of her family is less-than-impressive. I've already told you about all her horny chump friends. Her past is nothing but sex and drugs. The only admirable thing is that she seems serious about distancing herself from that crap.

I haven't officially "made a commitment" and I still half-joke about seeing other women, but I'm not seeing anyone else right now. I've thought about going out "trolling" over the last couple of weeks but then she calls me on the weekend and gives me the, "I'd really like to see you tomorrow"...and for some reason I just don't have the spine to outright say "no".

Then she gets here and she practically forces herself on me...partly my fault because I get her all riled up with kino...but I tell her "not right now" and she's unzipping my pants and god knows what else. Eventually my sexual side gets the best of me (thus the long lament above) and we end up doing it...cuz God knows I wanna f**K her...she's still hot and DTF all the time, even if I CAN'T see her as a long-term girlfriend.

I'd go in on it, give up "the game" for 6-9 months...if I thought there was a way out. I think she'll be sold on me by then and go completely psycho if I try to dump her. She wants to plan her life around me...she's debating taking this part-time job she was offered because it will reduce the time she can spend "playing with me".

I guess I'm just really afraid of when the "other foot is going to drop". She's honestly fine right now. But the amount of chaos in her past back home...there's no way she's as "normal" as she pretends to be, and I'm just waiting for her to explode into total insanity.

Plus she's almost 36! Those eggs are approaching their expiration date...how is THAT going to work out??

I mean...sometimes I feel like I'm becoming attached...most of the time I feel like she's a constant stress on my mind and I wish she would go away. If she called me tomorrow and told me, "I've met someone...we can't see each other any more", aside from the obvious blow to my ego, I'd actually feel pretty relieved.
 

Die Hard

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squirrels said:
Those eggs are approaching their expiration date...how is THAT going to work out??
:crackup::crackup::crackup::crackup::crackup:


Anyway, I guess you're being confronted with your own emotions and desire for intimacy. This girl is able to get to your heart and reach your deeper feelings...you feel you might become emotionally attached to her. Actually, this is supposed to be good and make you feel wonderful, lol. But it's frightening as well!

All of us have this desire to give into such feelings, to grant her access to our heart. But I believe that when you do this, you should do it SLOWLY! and stay in control of the ''process''. Based upon your anxiety over all of this, I'd say things are definitely moving too fast! You can't control your feelings and are, rightfully so, worried about going beyond the point of no return, where you can't disattach yourself from her no more!

I also believe that when you do this, you should choose the right woman for it. With these red flags you've named, I'd say this woman is definitely not suitable to do this!

I get the idea you just wanna lie down and be taken care of...take down the wall around your heart and let her soothe your wounds... But this doesn't seem like the right time and place to me, man. If I were you, I'd start disattaching myself from her emotionally. Not saying you should break it off totally, but you should definitely create some distance emotionally.


Just my two cents...
 
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